Waiting for the Blessing of My Father
By Gonzalo Salinas In October it will be ten years since I've seen my father. I remember clearly the last time I saw him. We were at the National Airport in Lima. Let me back-track. The flight to Miami was at 8 pm. For international flights, you are supposed to check in three ...
Diner – by Wentworth Miller
april 2013 by wentworth miller i was sitting in a diner on colorado boulevard the other day, enjoying a nice breakfast with a friend (late 40s, a working mother of three), when a homeless man materialized next to us. i say "materialized" because i had no awareness of him entering the restaurant (even though i was ...
Three reasons for Lance Armstrong to Check In! with the ManKind Project
by Boysen Hodgson [caption id="attachment_15063" align="alignleft" width="300"] RAGBRAI Team MKP USA[/caption]The ManKind Project USA cycling team recently participated in our second RAGBRAI (Register's Annual Great Bicycle Ride Across Iowa). We brought over 40 men and women from across the country (and Canada) to Iowa for the ride. Lance Armstrong came out ...
The Power of Going Deep
by Owen Marcus Back in my high school days, being popular meant being liked and respected by many. Being popular was having a lot of friends and a lot of girlfriends. The more friends and girlfriends you had, the more successful you were. As I moved through my early adulthood, the “more” ...
Why you might want a men’s group
by Boysen Hodgson You're invited to sit in a men's group. Feel free to bring a friend. When you're done with the initial raised eye-brow ... you might ask ... Why would I want to do that? You might want to keep building on the success that you are having right now! ...
Everything is Happening, All the Time
In the wake of tragedy. Masculinity, Culture, and Transformation by Boysen Hodgson The world is not a safe place. It never has been. I bet my life it never will be. Shadow and Light. Order and Entropy. The question, for me, is what is the QUALITY of this risky world? How am I co-creating ...
The New Macho
by Boysen Hodgson The New Macho He cleans up after himself. He cleans up the planet. He is a role model for young men. He is rigorously honest and fiercely optimistic. He holds himself accountable. He knows what he feels. He knows how to cry and he lets it go. He knows how to rage without hurting others. He knows ...
Right now, filmmaker Haydn Reiss is working on a documentary film about Bly’s life and career called “News of the Universe.” In the film, one of the things Reiss will do is look at some of the myths about Bly and the ‘men’s movement.’ He also has a great interview with John Densmore, the well known drummer from the 1960’s band The Doors, to talk about an oft misaligned ‘tool’ of men’s gatherings, the drum. Reiss has created a special appeal for the men of the ManKind Project – and also a special offer for MKP fans supporting the production of the film. Contributions are tax deductible.
by Mike Robbins
[reprinted with permission]
(For this week’s audio podcast, click here.)
I was scheduled to fly to Dublin, Ireland a few weeks ago for a speaking engagement and when I got to the airport I realized I’d forgotten my passport at home. I felt mortified and embarrassed – and then angry when I realized I wouldn’t be able to get on my flight. After a few hours of stress and drama, I was able to get myself on another flight, which would get me to Ireland on time for my event – although it did cost me quite a bit of money and forced my wife Michelle to have to drop what she was doing and rush to the airport with my passport.
by James Wilson
How would you define a fulfilling relationship? Does your current relationship match it? Is your current relationship leaving you drained or does it have you energized? How clearly can you identify what is working and what is not?
by Boysen Hodgson
On November 5, 2012, the New York Times published a new op-ed by David Brooks entitled “The Heart Grows Smarter” about a long term research study of men which was launched in the 1930′s and tracked men through the rest of their lives.
Though the researchers hadn’t intended to study male relationships … the most compelling results of the study were all about relationships. More specifically – they learned some key characteristics that would help men lead long, satisfying lives.
EDITOR’S NOTE: Here I will present three separate but connected stories … all concerning meditation. Meditation is a core practice for many New Warriors (men who have completed the New Warrior Training Adventure). There are multiple approaches to this in the ManKind Project, from basic sitting practices, ‘sit-spot’ practices done by many outdoor trackers and indigenous skills teachers, TM (transcendental meditation), Yogic Pranayama practices, Breathwork practices, Hollow Bones or Mondo Zen Rinzai traditions … and many others. Because the ManKind Project is not affiliated with any one religious practice – there are multiple paths offered and explored to increase self awareness. Here are a couple of pieces from within and outside of the ManKind Project on Meditation.
by Steve Harper
I lived in New York on 9/11. It’s a long story and I won’t go into here, but essentially I was heading downtown on a crowded bus (to work) when the second tower fell. It took me 6 hours to get back uptown to my apartment when I realized my workplace was closed. Buses were packed. Subways weren’t running. Pay phones were out of commission: lines were busy or phones were broken. I didn’t have a cell at the time.
by Eivind Skjellum
Often men in movies are portrayed as somewhat incomplete characters – the fumbling dad in the family comedy, the hard-ass action hero, the angst-ridden sensitive New Age ‘guy’ and so on. What chance does a teenager boy, moving into manhood, have of becoming a Jason Statham-type? (Not that I think it is even desirable)
I was born in 1958, part of a generation where many were raised in accordance with Dr. Benjamin Spock’s book, “Baby And Child Care,” often by parents who didn’t have a similar upbringing to which they could refer for any kind of comparative frame of reference.
Tuesday morning, I was driving my 4 year old daughter to preschool for the day.
We got talking about music.
I asked her, “Would you like to learn to play instrument?”
She said, “Sure.”
I said, “What instrument do you think you’d like to learn?”
Just after asking the question, I thought I’d try to stretch her thinking a bit, by adding, “The drums?”
by Peter Clothier
I have just finished reading Patience: The Art of Peaceful Living, by Allan Lokos, the founder and guiding teacher of the Community Meditation Center in New York City. It’s a timely read for a season in which the stresses seem to multiply in direct proportion to the peace and joy we’re supposed to be feeling — and too often, don’t!
by David Kaisar
My friends and clients know the importance I put upon the PERSPECTIVE we operate from. How do you see a thing, what is the metaphor, what is the story you make up? This is always much more important that the actual situation itself. Some of the common metaphors in time management include working on the 1> Big Rocks first (scheduling to make sure your most important tasks get time);2> Eat The Frog (do your biggest, most unpleasant tasks first, so that they are done, and your day can only get better!); and 3> the ever present Discipline. All well and good, if a bit dreary.
by Steve Harper
As the Rolling Stones said: “You can’t always get what you want.” That’s what I’ve been negotiating in my creative life these days. After months of continuing my search for TV writing work, I’ve not yet gotten a job. I’m still in the game, no question, but it’s been frustrating and difficult.
Editors Note: Mike has done a yeoman’s job of putting together this collection of New Warrior Music! Check out my three favorites – Be Real, We are Warriors, and Fall Away! All sales of this album directly support the ManKind Project Northwest Community’s Scholarship program.
by Mike Biskup
by Eivind Skjellum
Last night, I facilitated an evening workshop on the King Archetype with my friend and Brother, Pål Christian Buntz. En route to the workshop, I felt somewhat flat and hollow. I am familiar with that feeling. What I yearn for then is being filled in some way, to “feel seen and embraced for exactly who I am”. And that means, I need to feel blessed.
We live in a disposable culture, addicted to constant stimulation, new thrills, and instant gratification. In that kind of model, with all the blends of media encouragement to keep it up, and the pressures of trying to keep up with life, where is your relationship fitting in? Is it falling prey at all to “Hamster-itis” – my term for living life as if you’re a hamster or guinea pig on one of those wheels in a cage you remember from elementary school. Are you gauging the health of your relationship/marriage by how often you get those hits of feeling like it’s still exciting and giving you enough TPW (Thrills Per Week)?
It’s the original F word.
Not all feedback, mind you. There’s the good kind, and there’s the toxic kind.
In its ideal form, feedback is designed to help someone improve.
When given with trust and respect, feedback can be heard and acted upon.
But when it’s toxic, it can get ugly.
Many a verbal lashing and cruelty has been shed in the name of “Feedback”.
One of the successful strategies employed by the mainstream modernism of the 20th century to marginalize anything that threatened its hegemony was the myth of “art for art’s sake.” Art was supposed to be “about” nothing but itself, an internal system of references that seems, in retrospect, to be shamefully smug and self-congratulatory. This was one of the thoughts that leapt to mind as I walked into the exhibition Now Dig This: Art & Black in Los Angeles, 1960 — 1980, and found myself in a gallery surrounded by the powerful work of an old friend, Charles White. I have a story to tell about Charles White and racism: my own.
by David Kaisar
It’s been a long week, so I am just going to present this article, from the Harvard Business Review, on Nine Things Successful People Do, in list format, and I encourage you to read more.
1. Get specific.
2. Seize the moment to act on your goals.
3. Know exactly how far you have left to go.
4. Be a realistic optimist.
by Steve Harper
A funny thing happened to me on the way home from an event in downtown L.A.
I was performing in a benefit for Playwrights Arena, a theatre company – in an ensemble number from a show written by a friend of mine. Driving downtown can be tricky in Los Angeles, with commuter traffic and parking restrictions, and I ended up making a quick decision to park in a lot a few blocks from the Los Angeles Theatre Center, where the event took place.
by Jim Donovan
Much of what we are experiencing on the planet now has to do with a push towards exponential human evolution. Though your condition has always been one of consistent change, the time has come for that change to happen more rapidly. As we all know, our reactions to change are often accompanied by resistance. This resistance is your natural defense mechanism designed to keep you safe. The paradox is that to evolve involves taking risks, which inherently feels unsafe.