What stops you from claiming or more fully living your purpose?
The challenge I see constantly with people who want clarity of purpose, or want to bring more energy or focus to it, is that there’s at least one BIG block (if not several) in their life that’s keeping them from being fully engaged and lit up by their purpose.
I’d like to share with you the top 3 Purpose Blocks that I’ve discovered through the purpose work I’ve done with hundreds of people over the years; and then how to move through these blocks. Today I’ll focus on Purpose Block #1.
Here are the 3 Purpose Blocks:
- The Fear Triad
- The Doubting Voice
- The Distraction Vortex
Purpose Block #1 is the Fear Triad. I have consistently found three specific fears that people face when diving into discovering their purpose, OR when they are trying to put the vision of their purpose into action in the world. The three core purpose fears are:
- Fear of Survival (mostly financial)
- Fear of Failure
- Fear of Ridicule
The survival instinct is deeply rooted in our old brain, the reptilian brain, and is now, in our modern culture, mostly connected with our financial resources.
So the Fear of Survival unfolds like this: If you choose to go after your purpose, living it fully, then it may drain ALL your resources and/or not be sustainable in the future, and you won’t “make it” — you won’t survive. You won’t be able to pay the bills and feed your family. So, it’s just easier to avoid the question about purpose altogether than to face the possibility that you might not survive by living the “fantasy” of your purpose.
The Fear of Failure inside our purpose exploration can become more pronounced because the call of our purpose may stretch us into unknown areas, or test us with new approaches or concepts.
It may unfold like this: If you go for what you really want, your purpose, and fail; then you’ve failed on the really BIG one in life — living your purpose.” This would not just be failing on a project or a task, but may have the sense of a “whole-person failure” — the message being: “I am a failure in my life.”
The Fear of Ridicule unfolds like this: if your purpose is calling you to do something different in your life, to take on a new vision for your life with a new set of actions, you may find yourself misunderstood by family, friends, colleagues and maybe even your partner.
This exposes you to people’s reactions, their own fear and their ridicule. The fear may arise that you’ll be laughed, belittled or rejected because your ideas seem non-conventional or simply strange to others.
So, here is the 3-step flow of how to work with these natural fears in the Fear Triad:
> Awareness of the Fear
Notice and acknowledge the fear. It is important to pause yourself and take a deeper look inside at what these fears are for you. Name them in your OWN way and in your words. Bringing them out of the shadow and into the light of your conscious mind is the first step.
> Allow and Embrace
Once you are aware of your unique flavor of the fear, then you’re ready to embrace this fear as simply a part of you and a mechanism that your ego-mind uses to keep you safe.
This means accepting the fear with self-compassion and seeing it as a natural part of your growth and evolution as a human being. It’s important for you to watch your tendency to push the fear away, to deny it or pretend it’s not there.
> Open to a New Choice
As you allow and embrace your fear, it begins to lose its hold and power over you. It may still be there, but it’s been seen, named and embraced. So, now it’s time to make a new choice that supports your highest growth and calling in the moment.
What you thought was just not possible before because of one of these fears, now may seem possible. Make a NEW choice that serves you and your passionate, creative expression.
In the Man on Purpose 7-Week Online Course we teach you a powerful tool called the Reframing Process that will help you reframe your fear messages and shift them to new possibilities and new choices.
Go to our course information page to learn more.
Chris has trained and coached hundreds of individuals to achieve greater success in their businesses and their lives. In partnership with The ManKind Project® USA, he recently created The Power of Purpose Summit and the Man On Purpose online course. He is also the co-creator, with Amy Ahlers, of the ongoing tele-series, New Man, New Woman, New Life.
In addition to his leadership development work, Chris has spent over 24 years as an executive, entrepreneur, consultant and business coach, working in Fortune 500 companies and owning his own eco-adventure travel company. Chris graduated from Stanford University where he studied Political Science. He lives with his wife in Northern California.
– is a deeply personal issue that everyone decides for himself. Sometimes the price is high, sometimes low. But this is not very important for life. Life is an interesting thing. And the price on Viagra – too.
