Involving Fathers (How we do it in Canada)
by Ryan Stanga
From my perspective, the recognition of the importance of involved Fathering has grown over the last several years. Given my understanding of fathers’ involvement in the middle and later part of the 20th Century, through movies and TV shows, my experience of my own father and the fathers of friends as I was growing up, I am encouraged by what I perceive to be more involvement between of men with their children.
At the same time, I recognize how hard it can be for some of us to be involved in our children’s lives in a meaningful way. I was hit hard by the truth I heard while watching the TV show Mad Men when the main character Don Draper, a non-custodial father at the time, said in response to being asking about seeing his kids:
“I don’t see them enough. And when I do I don’t know what to do. And when I drop them off, I feel relieved. And then I miss them.” [Mad Men: Season 4]
I judge that what we do in the ManKind Project supports men to be meaningfully involved in their children’s lives. I also know that we are not alone in this.
In Canada we have multiple programs and initiatives supporting fathers. One initiative is the Canadian Father Involvement Initiative Canadian Father Involvement Initiative sponsored by the Public Health Agency of Canada. According to the website:
[The Canadian Father Involvement Initiative] encourages the responsible involvement of fathers, grandfathers, uncles, brothers, and any other man who is influencing a child. Fathers play a vital role in the healthy development of children. Amazing things happen to kids, moms, the community, and to dads, when men give their time, attention, and focus to the children they are raising.
Offering support to fathers and community organizers alike, they provide information and link men to programs and agencies in their local communities.
One recent initiative is the 24-hour Cribside Assistance website (www.cribside.ca). With the look and feel of a car manual this site features videos and written instructions on some of the basics of fathering a newborn or baby for new fathers or male caregivers.
Other resources for fathers in Ontario and the Greater Toronto Area include:
• Dads Today (www.dadstoday.org) – “The home for guys raising kids”, offering programs such as (from the website):
o Dad’s Time – a time for dads and kids to hang out together, share some fun, and eat some dinner.
o Dad-canics: Fine Tuning for New Dads – for expecting dads and dads with babies under 1 year old
o Dads and Kids: In Action – gym days
• Caring Dads (www.caringdadsprogram.com) – “an intervention program designed for men who have abused or neglected their children or exposed them to abuse of their mothers…This site is a resource for community agencies and individuals wishing to learn more about the Caring Dads program.”
Ryan Stanga is a married father of 3: two girls aged 16 and 3 and a one-year old boy. His professional time is spent consulting as an organizational development and research specialist, primarily with non-/not-for-profit organizations. He completed his initiation weekend in April 2007, at Camp Wathana, just outside of Holly, Michigan. He is currently the Chairman of the ManKind Project-Toronto Board of Directors.
– is a deeply personal issue that everyone decides for himself. Sometimes the price is high, sometimes low. But this is not very important for life. Life is an interesting thing. And the price on Viagra – too.
