So Far Within Reach - una poesia

Categoria: Poesia

da Jeffrey Bates

... Una piccola barca seduto sulle rocce sulla spiaggia
mentre si avvicinava si sentiva appena fuori della sua portata
i remi giacevano dentro mezzo comunicati
il vecchio sulla sedia fece un sogno mentre sonnecchiava.

Il flusso dalla montagna scese alla riva
Se la barca aveva sognato di un uomo che conosceva prima
Si avvicinò e vide il mondo, senza cura,
Come respirava sotto il sole, si sentiva l'aria frizzante del mattino.

Il vecchio, ha spostato un po 'sulla sedia
Aveva pensato di aver visto qualcuno in piedi
"Get in!" Sospirò, mentre passava sul bordo,
"La barca è pronta e la riva è nessuna copertura."

Lui agitò ancora una volta sulla sedia sotto il portico
Il giovane uomo, si sentiva fiamma, ma una torcia.
Mentre spingeva la piccola barca dalle rocce sulla spiaggia
Che una volta era finora era ormai a portata di mano.

9 FEBBRAIO 2014

Jeff Bates

Jeffrey Bates, l'autore e illustratore di The Little Bucket , ha conseguito il BA da Anderson College (Università), in Anderson, Indiana in Religione e Sociologia (1985) e Master of Divinity da Seminary Christian Theological, Indianapolis, Indiana (1990). Ha lavorato con i bambini ei giovani per la maggior parte della sua carriera mentre serve chiese, sia a tempo pieno e parziale e come volontario dal 1986-1996 e 2011-2014. Ha completato la formazione avventura New Warrior nel 1996.

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The Little Bucket - Book A bambini - la risposta è dentro

by Boysen Hodgson


Fratello Nuova Warrior Jeffrey Bates (Bedford, Indiana 1996), ha scritto la storia di un mitico per bambini chiamato The Little Bucket . Con una voce poetica e illustrazioni uniche The Little Bucket è il viaggio di un eroe che animerà e stimolare l'immaginazione. Il libro insegna empatia, i confini, come comprendere il bullismo, raggiungere per aiuto, e anche su cosa vuol dire sentirsi soli e persi e non so cosa fare al riguardo.

Quando ho ricevuto il libro di Jeff all'inizio di questa primavera, ho condiviso con i miei figlie adottivi. Entrambi hanno apprezzato la storia, e ha aperto una conversazione molto più grande di ciò che significa guardare dentro quando le cose sono difficili. In una cultura senza un sacco di forti modelli di intelligenza emotiva e responsabilità personale, questa è una storia che può aprire alcune porte. Sfida colpa e la vergogna modelli che possono ottenere incorporati così in fretta nella psiche di un bambino. Ho parlato di nuovo ai messaggi di The Little Bucket quando si lavora con le mie figlie per ricordare loro che la cosa sta succedendo sul 'esterno' è solo una piccola parte della realtà ... la roba BIG è al suo interno.

Le illustrazioni tematiche sono dolci e colorate. La poesia scorre con ogni giro della pagina come la storia si muove attraverso la perdita e la rivelazione di una risposta misteriosa al problema.

Un membro ha commentato: "uso Jeff Bates 'di rima e immaginazione crea una storia per aiutare i lettori di tutte le età a guardare dentro di sé e vivere la vita nella sua pienezza". (Roxanne L. Pace, Mediateca specialista, Brevard County, Florida)

Jeff Bates dice: "Una delle cose che ci mancano nel nostro approccio per aiutare a costruire il carattere nei nostri bambini e sentire fiducia in se stessi è un modello The Little benna colma questa lacuna e offre l'opportunità per una più profonda discussione su le cose che contano di più.: sentimenti. Una volta che siamo in grado di consentire la discussione di sentimenti, possiamo fare grandi passi avanti per aiutare i nostri figli concentrarsi meglio e diventare forte dall'interno. "

E continua: "Siamo tutti travolti dal mondo digitale divertente che distrae davvero ragazzi del vero apprendimento di cui hanno bisogno di fare. Non sto parlando solo di 'apprendimento scolastico', ma conoscere quello che sta succedendo al suo interno. "

Inoltre, quando i bambini sperimentano la pressione sociale a conformarsi e cedere alle altre, e si sentono distratti o intimiditi da esso, si può perdere traccia di se stessi, hanno difficoltà di concentrazione e poi passare il resto della loro vita cercando di recuperare.

Bates afferma che lui è interessato a vendere il libro, non solo per il gusto di libri, ma per quello che può accadere quando si è sentito. The Little Bucket può aiutare i bambini a scoprire se stessi al suo interno e, secondo Psicoterapeuta Larry Pesavento di Cincinnati, Ohio, scoprono che "la felicità è un lavoro interno."

Se avete bimbi piccoli, o quelli più grandi, e si lotta con iniziare una conversazione intorno a sentimenti come tristezza, paura, rabbia o anche con loro la gioia, questo libro può essere un utile pedale di avviamento.

The Little Bucket è disponibile su Amazon.com o BarnesandNoble.com per ordinare. Visitate anche il piccolo secchio su Facebook ed essere sicuri di dargli un "LIKE". Jeff ha anche la presentazione secchiello dove viene al vostro gruppo / classe / scuola per presentare la storia, hanno una discussione e poi cantare The Ballad of The secchiello. È possibile visitare la pagina dell'autore a http://jeffreybates.net per ulteriori informazioni.

Boysen Hodgson

Boysen Hodgson è il Direttore Comunicazione e Marketing per l'umanità progetto USA, tutoraggio e formazione organizzazione no-profit che offre straordinarie possibilità di crescita personale degli uomini, in ogni fase della vita. Boysen conseguito la laurea con lode presso l'Università del Massachusetts ad Amherst, dopo aver completato 2 anni di progettazione corsi presso la Cornell University. Egli ha aiutato le aziende e gli individui progettare il cambiamento che volete vedere nel mondo per 15 anni. E 'un marito dedicato.

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Amare Through My Shadow - una poesia

Categoria: Uomini e ombra , Poesia

by Les Gaines

Che cosa è questa ombra che mi segue, accidenti?
Solo una bugia di quello che sono veramente.
Un segno di ieri
quando un ragazzo ha detto che non ero abbastanza bravo per giocare.

Quella vecchia macchia è stata come una pietra
bloccaggio via il mio cuore in una catacomba.

Come posso vivere?
Come posso respirare?
Con questo miraggio di limitazione accecante mio destino.

Pago il prezzo per sentirsi degno.
Ma ancora è chiaro che io non sono libero.
No, solo un proxy di quello che dovrei essere,
offrendo un piccolo assaggio di quello che potrebbe essere.

E per quanto riguarda un po 'di autenticità,
Se cado la lancia,
se lascio cadere il mio scudo
se davanti a voi con la mia vergogna rivelato,
Se lascio la mia mente stabilirsi in questo spazio,
e mostra il di anni di paure incisi sul mio viso,
allora posso stare?
Posso restare e ti amo attraverso le mie ombre comunque.

Quell'ombra ha un vicolo cieco su di me,
nulla che io possa fare a volte, ma dire che mi dispiace.

Mi dispiace per mia madre.
Mi dispiace per mio padre.
Mi dispiace per quel mostro in fondo alla strada.
E che 'tutti chiamavano un geek.
Mi dispiace per la mia grande testa.
Mi dispiace per i miei timori.
Mi dispiace che ho morso indietro duro,
quando sono caduto attaccato, e non mi è chiaro.

Ma, se dico che mi dispiace di essere me,
posso stare e ti amo attraverso le mie ombre comunque.

Lo so ...
re hanno altro palazzo
e, ragazzi altri giocattoli.
Gli amanti hanno altre passioni
e, i guerrieri di altri stratagemmi.
Ma un uomo ha un solo cuore per sentire.
E, se è fortunato che sarà lui a tenere su un amico che è reale.
Così, io resterò, resterò e vi amo con le mie ombre comunque.

Les Gaines

Dopo aver ottenuto la vittoria sul invalidante PTSD, Les Gaines torna alla sua missione come un guaritore, allenatore, altoparlante, e avvocato per i sopravvissuti disabili di traumi infantili. Lui è un guaritore metafisica certificata, e uno studente appassionato di Giudeo / mistica cristiana, e sciamanesimo. Les spera di condividere il suo percorso di guarigione e la responsabilizzazione attraverso il suo amore per la poesia, l'arte e la musica. Les ha completato la formazione avventura New Warrior nel mese di agosto 2012, ed è membro grata della igroup BWOE nel DM.

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So trauma - una poesia

Categoria: Uomini e ombra , Poesia

by Les Gaines

Come se addormentato in un mare di smentita, odiando la mia ombra,
il mio amico fedele con me lungo tante miglia.
So che la paura paralizzante di intensificare al di là della porta d'ingresso;
che la speranza di una vita migliore è stata lasciata ignorato migliore.

So trauma.

So che il dubbio che viene
quando tutti sbagliato sembra giusto,
e tutto sembra giusto sbagliato;
quando ogni braccio, ma la mia sembra forte.

So che l'impotenza di cercare di sentire come qualcosa,
mentre il mio cervello sta gridando che io sono niente.

So trauma.

L'intrusione di phantom mani, suoni, e profumi
che attraversano il divario di tempo a fare pericolo sento così imminente.
Flashback si chiamano,
per coloro che camminano con la memoria intatta.
So quanto tempo che il panico può durare.

Ma so anche il potere di Bontà e Vita
che scherma un soldato in più vizioso di lotte.
So che la forza delle mani, pronti a sopravvivere.

Vedi,
So come prosperare.
Come cercare le risorse infinite della mente,
per sbloccare le catene del peccato ripristino innocenza,
Ho pensato lasciato alle spalle.

So che il potere del desiderio di libertà
che mi ha fatto stare dalla mia crawl, e
buttare via che zerbino con la scritta "free-for-all".

Questa è la mia vita!
Ed è tempo che il cambiamento
le regole di quel vecchio gioco offensivo
per ripristinare ogni frammento del mio Sé al suo giusto posto.

Dirò quello che sono,
Amore, Vita e Libertà.
Sono Choice. Sono Real.
Io sono qui ... con il coraggio di guarire.

Les Gaines

Dopo aver ottenuto la vittoria sul invalidante PTSD, Les Gaines torna alla sua missione come un guaritore, allenatore, altoparlante, e avvocato per i sopravvissuti disabili di traumi infantili. Lui è un guaritore metafisica certificata, e uno studente appassionato di Giudeo / mistica cristiana, e sciamanesimo. Les spera di condividere il suo percorso di guarigione e la responsabilizzazione attraverso il suo amore per la poesia, l'arte e la musica. Les ha completato la formazione avventura New Warrior nel mese di agosto 2012, ed è membro grata della igroup BWOE nel DM.

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LEADER ferito: A Book Review

Categoria: Recensioni

Guest post di Peter Clothier

"Leader feriti: britannica elitarismo e l'illusione diritto", di Nick Duffell.

In primo luogo, non date per scontato dal sottotitolo di questo libro che è irrilevante per noi qui in America, o per la nostra leadership. È di vitale importanza, non importa la specificità del suo bersaglio. Titolo di Nick Duffell avrà risonanza per chi ha vissuto negli ultimi due decenni in America e ho guardato i nostri capi feriti in azione, o, più correttamente, l'inazione. Che-detto e ci torneremo a questa sua tesi centrale è che il collegio di governo istruita elite in Gran Bretagna sono di per sé inconsciamente disciplinati dalle ferite durevoli sostenute dalla esperienza di essere mandato via dalla famiglia in tenera età, e collocato in un ambiente militarista in cui imparano a proteggersi da un mondo esterno ostile.

Posso parlare di questo. Io sono quello che Duffell riferisce giustamente come un sopravvissuto Boarding School. Come psicoterapeuta praticante, ha una lunga pratica progettato per portare queste persone di ritorno da loro disorientamento emotivo e l'isolamento. Avrei potuto usare i suoi servizi, molto tempo fa, ma ha dovuto scoprire la mia strada attraverso questo labirinto. Sono stato mandato via a scuola all'età di sette anni, e per il momento sono scappato verso la libertà, all'età di diciotto anni, avevo ricevuto una notevole formazione testa-oriented ma è rimasto quello che spesso mi descrivo come un invalido emotivo. Avevo imparato l'arte costosa e pericolosa di evasione e di invulnerabilità emotivo. Come un sette o otto anni, non potevo permettermi di fare altro che reprimere i sentimenti che mi aprirebbero per attaccare dai miei compagni di pensionanti: paura, rabbia, tristezza, dolore, il terribile dolore di essere separati dai genitori che mi ha assicurato che amavano me, anche se era difficile capire il paradosso di essere amato e ancora esiliato dalla famiglia, il luogo di quell'amore.

Il risultato della mia formazione eccellente è che non ho mai cresciuto. Piuttosto, mi ci sono voluti altri tre anni prima di rendermi conto che c'era qualcosa di sbagliato con la vita come una tartaruga in un guscio. Imbarco Scuola sopravvissuti, come Duffell li descrive, sono stentata individui così coinvolti nella loro testa che rimangono scollegati dalla loro cuori. Io semplificare i suoi argomenti profondamente ben informati e sottili, la cui linea di fondo è che la classe dirigente della Gran Bretagna, collegio e Oxbridge educato, sono estremamente qualificato per portare nel nostro mondo del XXI secolo perché ottengono così intensamente concentrati sulla loro distorto, visione razionale delle questioni nazionali e globali che rimangono impermeabili (invulnerabili) per il quadro più ampio dei bisogni umani. Essi sono in grado di ascoltare, di entrare in empatia con gli altri che se stessi e la propria specie. Essi sono guidati dalla certezza del loro senso di rettitudine. Dubitare, a domanda, per avere un cambiamento del cuore è quello di essere vulnerabili, e la vulnerabilità è l'ultima cosa al mondo che possono permettersi. (Capitolo finale di Duffell, il dubbio, è particolarmente eloquente e sul bersaglio.)

Sono certamente qualificato per valutare gli aspetti più tecnici della tesi di Duffell. Per questo lettore, sembra impressionante informati e up-to-date con le ultime scoperte delle neuroscienze e della psicologia accademica. Si basa su una visione ampia dello sviluppo filosofico del razionalismo ei suoi critici, i movimenti sociali compensative di repressione e ribellione, e contestualizza la sua argomentazione in quella prospettiva storica. Nella nostra epoca contemporanea, i suoi esemplari sono in primo luogo quelli come l'ex primo ministro Tony Blair, l'Inghilterra attuale primo ministro David Cameron, e il sindaco di Londra Boris Johnson, i cui atteggiamenti e le azioni sono profondamente e in vista-erroneamente di Duffell reazionaria. Come lo vede, si bullo e spacconate loro modo passato opposizione in azioni militari futili e programmi sociali che arricchiscono il già privilegiato e ricco e contribuiscono all'impoverimento continuo dei bisognosi. Nessuna meraviglia che l'Inghilterra che descrive è un paese arrabbiato.

Verso la fine del libro, Duffell espande la sua visione di una élite diritto a includere breve riferimento alle americane leader in particolare, naturalmente, George W. Bush, il cui perseguimento cieco e sconsiderato di un ossessione illusoria ci correvano a capofitto nella guerra contro l'Iraq. I risultati disastrosi sono con noi oggi, nella forma di un Medio Oriente in subbuglio senza fine. Guardando l'America oggi, una nazione di persone sicuramente arrabbiato come il British-avevo sostengono che ciò che Duffell chiama illusione diritto non è affatto limitato a elitismo britannico. I nostri leader devono essere conteggiati tra i feriti. La nostra leadership è dominata dalla litigi di ragazzini che non hanno mai cresciuto oltre la necessità di proteggere se stessi e il loro territorio da parte di chi non è d'accordo con loro. I nostri problemi politici sono gli stessi di quelli Duffell descrive nel suo paese: il militarismo, il razionalismo sbagliata e pregiudizievole, una mancanza di empatia per i poveri e diseredati, un presupposto di rettitudine che rifiuta altre visioni senza udienza, un rifiuto arrabbiato di dubbio o di rivalutazione di precedentemente detenuta viste.

Il diritto, direi, non è di proprietà esclusiva delle élite britannica. Io stesso credo che sia anche, più in generale, un fattore di privilegio maschile storica, la tradizione patriarcale. C'è un mito persistente nella nostra cultura che vede gli uomini come esseri razionali, il controllo degli eventi, in grado, pratiche, mentre le donne sono (ancora, agli occhi di troppi di noi uomini) percepiti come irrazionale, guidato dalle emozioni piuttosto che la ragione , e quindi meno competente in posizioni di leadership. Duffell sostiene con passione per una via di mezzo, quella che minimizza né la ragione né emozione, ma riequilibra il quoziente di intelligenza con il quoziente emotivo, la testa con il cuore, la ragione con compassione ed empatia. Sono d'accordo con lui, che, se non come una specie in grado di trovare l'equilibrio, siamo in tempi pericolosi per avanti. Il suo libro è un monito e importante della necessità di "cambiare idea" in un modo fondamentale, e aprirci al potente e pratico-sapienza del cuore. Mi auguro sinceramente che il libro troverà lettori al di là del paese di origine di cui scrive. Le sue intuizioni sono profondamente necessarie ovunque, in tutto il mondo.

Guarda per prossimo romanzo di Peter Clothier sulla sessualità maschile, "il bastone del pellegrino" (un vecchio eufemismo per il pene.) E 'raccontata da due narratori, una figura pittore contemporaneo e 18 ° secolo e gentleman inglese. Scene di sesso Frank e potboiler eccitazione! Pietro è un NWTA 1994 avviare, un anziano attivo rituale di una volta, e scrittore d'arte ben noto. Il suo ultimo libro, "slow Looking: The Art of Guardando Art," esplora i valori di contemplazione e meditazione. Sentitevi liberi di scrivere lui a peter clothier@mac.com .

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Un circolo di uomini

by Les Gaines

Mi siedo in un cerchio con uomini
che sono pronti ad andare dentro,
i cui occhi fiammata come diamanti in incognito
e i cui corpi sono pronti con determinazione.

Non volendo scendere a compromessi,
e con le menti intelligenti come un dispositivo di levigatura,
i fratelli ascoltano.
Per gemiti e gemiti di ombre e dubbi
che totale: "Sono meno."

In questo cerchio di uomini,
troviamo tracce di speranza che abbiamo visto prima,
nascosto dietro le porte d'infanzia
suscitando dolore dobbiamo esplorare.

E in questo viaggio troviamo missione della nostra vita
di essere ciò che siamo, senza chiedere il permesso.
Per fare quello che gli uomini buoni hanno sempre fatto,
essere disposti ad essere "l'Uno."

In questo cerchio di uomini,
un guerriero aumenta all'occasione,
per vedere il mondo ha fatto
e rivendicare il suo potere di cambiarla.

Qui le mani battere su tamburi,
E, ruggisce maschili formano le nostre canzoni,
chiamando le quattro direzioni, il cielo e la terra
e sulle spalle di antenati ci prendiamo il nostro lavoro.

In questo cerchio di uomini,
c'è il potere di trasformare il minerale all'acciaio,
per sciogliere ogni illusione che impedisce
vivere una vita che è reale.

In questo cerchio di uomini,
non vi è verità in proiezioni
e guarire quando un uomo incontra i suoi riflessi dorati.

Les Gaines

Dopo aver ottenuto la vittoria sul invalidante PTSD, Les Gaines torna alla sua missione come un guaritore, allenatore, altoparlante, e avvocato per i sopravvissuti disabili di traumi infantili. Lui è un guaritore metafisica certificata, e uno studente appassionato di Giudeo / mistica cristiana, e sciamanesimo. Les spera di condividere il suo percorso di guarigione e la responsabilizzazione attraverso il suo amore per la poesia, l'arte e la musica. Les ha completato la formazione avventura New Warrior nel mese di agosto 2012, ed è membro grata della igroup BWOE nel DM.

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The Rising di bontà fondamentale - Incarnazione in una società globale

Categoria: Poesia

da Two Crows Calling

In primo luogo abbiamo preso uno sguardo duro al nostro ego
Parlando nostri sentimenti di quello che volevamo in amore, il lavoro e un mondo di pace
Scoprire nelle nostre diadi e nella nostra meditazione che cosa
noi desiderava era così spesso in avaria,
"Stallo", non succede.

Abbiamo visto la nostra auto sabotaggio, che vivono nell'illusione, l'inganno,
incolpare gli altri, catturati in sottili consumatori e famiglia
drammi. La nostra lista di contraffazione, tratti bozzolo ha colpito casa
come all'infinito scoraggiare. Per noi, "guardando bene" così spesso
ha vinto fuori sopra solo di essere Bontà.

Seduto, abbiamo collegato profondamente con la nostra "disordine"
Avevamo messo il nostro carro davanti ai buoi vento della nostra vita.
Non siamo stati vivendo dalle ultime parole del Buddha
"Siate una lampada al Yourself"

Che fortuna buona dharma superato il nostro dubbio, paura e
timidezza. Siamo stati liberati da energie ben più potenti
e vasto di trame ripetitive della cultura dominante.

La nostra pratica affilato la nostra volontà e ampliato il nostro cuore.
I nostri insegnanti hanno ispirato noi -breathing verità e l'amore in noi.

Un giorno, finalmente detto un pieno e profondo "SI"
È sussurrato nel tuo cuore. "OK. Sono stanco di essere
malato e stanco di tutte le mie misure hearted mezze ".

Hai detto la tua mente e il cuore. "Sono pronto a prendere tutto su".

Sono pronto a prendere il dolore e angoscia della società nel mio
proprio tenero, grande e spaziosa Cuore.

E si fece avanti per la parte anteriore del palco grande della storia
È realizzato il poeta Rilke aveva ragione, dopo tutto:

"Qualunque sia la domanda, L'amore è la risposta."

La fame si diffonde in Africa e in Medio Oriente, mentre marcisce grano
nel nostro Midwest riserve di deposito di grano. Più amore necessario. Il 37.000
neonati e bambini morti ogni giorno da acqua inquinata. Più del mio amore necessario.

Le morti apparentemente senza fine di madri e bambini in Siria.
Più amore necessario. Acqua pulita per i bambini? Più amore da me.
Rompere l'orrore del traffico di esseri umani e la schiavitù?
Più amore da me.

Ci si chinò sul vento. Into the Storm. Into the Darkness
del nostro presente Age. Ci siamo rallegrati per il progresso della Bontà.

Abbiamo trovato il dharma era il nostro Scudo, la nostra spada. La nostra luce.
Ci siamo sentiti nelle nostre ossa "Questo è il mio moment.This è il nostro momento."

E così con ogni respiro, abbiamo aperto ampia nostro cuore al dolore
e la sofferenza di questo mondo.

Nel corso del tempo il nostro campo d'azione ampliato sempre di più. Guerrieri sacri
di bontà fondamentale è apparso al nostro fianco. Siamo diventati una Unità.

Insieme ai miei fratelli e sorelle
Andiamo avanti in questo vasto mondo
semi fertili nel vento
Rendere illuminata Società Possibile.
Shambhala! Shambhala!

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The Butterfly King - Edmond Manning sulla Scrittura e Daring

da Edmond Manning

Con quale diritto un uomo bianco raccontare la storia di un uomo di colore? Descrivere lotte che dell'uomo, le sfide che deve affrontare per tutta la vita, i disagi di vivere in una cultura bianco-centrica?

Mi sono fatto questa domanda molte volte.

Nel mese di settembre, il terzo libro nella mia serie 'Kings Lost and Found', The Butterfly King è stato pubblicato. La premessa è la stessa in ogni libro: un gay, meccanico Midwestern invita un altro uomo per trascorrere il fine settimana insieme. He promises “…if you submit in every single way, I will help you remember your kingship. I will help you remember the man you were always meant to be.”

Sound familiar?

It's a bastardization of the NWTA weekend. Well, kinda. There are absolutely no affiliations or mentions of MKP in the novel. There is not a fictional organization cleverly renamed “LKP.” Nope. No crossover activities. None. The car mechanic narrator relies on Joseph Campbell and the masculine archetypes to create experiences that help each man discover his unique giftedness. Combined with fairy tale storytelling, emotional manipulation, and a healthy scoop of man-on-man sex, these books have attracted attention for their innovative look at the masculine psyche and the possibility that all men are kings.

I've delighted in writing about different types of men. My tall tales celebrate the power of men, the beauty of men, which includes their woes: the lifelong consequences on a man whose father died young (the first book, King Perry), an angry man who feels betrayed by love and how shitty his life turned out (the second book, King Mai), and the most recent book, my third, deals with a black man in New York city who sacrificed his own future to care for his family.

The Butterfly King.

But by what right does a white man tell a black man's story?

No right.

I find myself in a curious and difficult position. I want to write about interesting people and fascinating lives. It's what writers do, I guess. But how dare a pasty-white, middle-class man attempt to get inside the head of a man of color? I can't possibly know the circumstances of prejudice he experienced growing up and throughout adulthood. It's very possible my attempts to portray empathy come across as condescending, ill-informed, and patronizing. I worry about this. It keeps me awake at night.

A curious parallel exists in my fiction genre.

Right now, most of the books written about the men-loving-men are written by heterosexual women. I'm not kidding. They compose the lion's share of the market of both writers and readers. Some have adopted a man's name for better acceptance or to hide their identities, afraid of the backlash. Most are open and proud of their writing prowess. In fact, gay men now find it difficult to publish their stories—honest-to-gayness-men-loving-men stories—because women so dominate this field and their preferences have become industry traditions. Gay men must conform to these industry standards to get published or be marginalized.

Huh.

The debate comes up three times a year or more in the blogosphere. By what right do women step in and tell gay men's stories? By what right? They don't experience gay bashing, homophobic slurs, and hell, they don't even have the right junk.

And yet, they write. They dare.

The reasons fascinate me. They feel called. Because the stories are about love. Because it's more interesting than writing about their known world, male-female relationships. Some of these women have gay kids, gay friends, gay garage mechanics and they want to make the world safer, more accepting. Whatever their reasons, they dare.

I love this. They dare.

Don't we also dare?

As men in MKP, don't we dare to love men different from ourselves? Don't we step outside our comfortable skins to love men of different ages, of different colors? Don't Republicans sometimes cradle Democrats as they weep over lost marriages? Have you not seen some granola, hippie leader love a young corporate go-getter, doing whatever it takes to honoring that man's kingship? I know you have.

I've seen it, too.

We do not interfere in each other's lives because it's our right to do so. We do it because we dare to love each other as men, as brothers.

I researched this book thoroughly. I read about shifting ethnic migrations to and from New York City from the 1950s through the 2000s. I read books about race. I read articles about white authors attempting to write black characters. I read blogs about blind-spots in dominant culture and how it shows up in insidious, exclusionary ways. I'm glad I did this research, but none of it gives me the right to write.

But I dare.

I write about men of color because I have loved men of color. I have wept in their arms and they in mine. We told our sad stories and felt each other's masculine healing. On staff weekends, we have wiped away each other's sweat and tears, and went back to the carpet if not refreshed, certainly more sturdy. More ready to bear the next sorrowful tale.

We celebrate each other by telling these stories, stories which are not always ours to tell.

I remember a night long ago when my I-group decided my work that night was to share my coming out story. I shrugged. Although I had been complaining of the lifelong estrangements it has caused, I felt it wasn't really relevant. Happened over two decades ago. As I told the experience telling my parents I was gay, two of the straight men in my group cried. Another man said, “Listen to me repeat this to you.”

When I heard my own story coming from his mouth, I cried myself because the story —surprise, surprise— was sad. Although he repeated a few details wrong, he heard and honored the spirit of the tale. Apparently I had to hear it from someone else to recognize the sadness.
When I think about this latest novel, I'm sure I fucked up in a few places because, like most of us, I sometimes fuck up when I'm attempting a big project. That is one story about me. Here is another story I learned by working with MKP: I am also glorious, ridiculously bold and I radiate effervescent, sparkling love from my fingertips when I type fiction. I have the power to reveal how gorgeous, how beautiful men can be.

I celebrate us.

And so, I dare.

Butterfly King

Edmond Manning is the author of a series, The Lost and Founds. The first three books in this series include King Perry, King Mai (a Lambda Literary finalist 2014), and most recently, The Butterfly King. Feel free to say hello at remembertheking@comcast.net .

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Working on My 'To Be' List

by Stephen Simmer – MKP USA Mission Circle Coordinator

I don't read emails, I scan them. The idea of slowing down and staying fully present with a thought is very difficult, very foreign to me. If you're like me, you might notice a persistent voice, right now, telling you to hurry through this email, to grab the point that Simmer is making, deposit into the meaning-bank for possible future use, and move onto the next email waiting in the inbox. If you're like me, right now you're saying to yourself, “I got it” and hurdling over phrases and sentences to get to the next paragraph to see if there's more you need to grab. If you're like me, you don't read, you plunder for necessary meaning as if you're looting a store for a couple of things of value.

I'm also aware that I'm that way with many parts of my life I supposedly care about. I listen with a half an ear to my kids, I listen to my wife impatiently, hoping she will get to the point so I can move on, I hurry down the road with my dogs to get the walk out of the way as fast as I can so I can get onto some other tasks that I can also hurry through.

When I think of working more on mission, there is a voice in me that says emphatically, “I don't have time to do any more.” The conveyer belt is too fast already. I need to work, sack the trash, lug the air conditioners back to the garage, order the stone for the patio, pick up the prescription. Mission? Maybe I can schedule some world-transformation Tuesday between my son's soccer game and grilling the burgers. If I can't sandwich it in there, I'll get to it next lifetime, or the one after that. My mission gradually becomes my o-mission, what I leave out.

This is all wrong. I was taught on my training many years ago that a mission statement had a vision and an action. An action: I saw it as another task on my endless to-do list. But what if mission is not a job? What if it's really a presence? What if it's a challenge to do less, with magnificence? What if it means slowing down, committing to be fully present in this ordinary, splendid moment? What if mission means that I commit myself to be a human be-ing rather than a human do-ing? What if busy-ness is a symptom of evasion of what really matters?

Athletes talk of special times when the game slows down, and maybe mission is really about a commitment to slowing life down so that moments become momentous. These are the moments of Flow that Mihaly Csikszentmihaly identified. This precious moment with my son outside school when he quietly takes my hand as we walk. This encounter with the CVS clerk. This walk with my dog in the rain, both of us dying, him probably a few steps ahead of me, leading the way. I'm ditching my to-do list and starting a to-be list. And what is startling to me is that there is only one thing on the list: to answer the door and welcome the visitor who has been waiting.

Stephen Simmer

Steve Simmer, for those of us privileged to know him, lives his life in the midst of the constant stream and theme of mission. Abbastanza appropriato, una delle sue dichiarazioni di intenti formale è che "crea un mondo di libertà, incoraggiando gli uomini con il mio coraggio per fare tutto ciò che può essere e di essere tutto ciò che si può fare." Con la professione di psicoterapeuta, lavora continuamente per ispirare gli uomini che vogliono trovare attivamente e impegnarsi nella loro missione in questo mondo. Dr. Simmer ha completato la formazione avventura New Warrior nel 2001, e non è mai stato lo stesso uomo da allora.
Per ulteriori informazioni su Steve e il suo lavoro potete visitare il suo sito web

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My Poem 310: Meeting Wisdom

My Poem 310: Meeting Wisdom

The shaman knows those noises…
They sometimes disturb the hunt…they
are sometimes the result of the hunt…
You see, the shaman has kept
to his roots, not like the shamans
reed flute, having been cut from
its root, its soundings are the
lamentations of the broken hearted
which the shaman knows but he
Also knows of the healed heart…
knows the Icy grags and shadowed
vales…becoming knowing of the songs…
Of the void between notes, between
the lyrics, between the breath taken
in and the breath expelled… There
he finds the knowing of Wisdom…
There, he meets Her…Mother Sophia

——-

Addenda i54: Oscar Wilde said,

“Ah! Don't say you agree with me. When
people agree with me I always feel that I must be wrong.”

Do our poems have
to please everyone?
Do we have
a responsibility to be provocative?

Sì! MEN!
We Have That Responsibility!

Of course! We have that responsibility!
Wilde said that! Wilde lived that!
Our 'modern' circumstances demand that …
How could we not … but to invite another Hitler …

Gaia, Mother Earth is demanding that!
Creating storm after massive storm
beyond our experience …

I am demanding that! … of
my Brothers & my Sisters!

The call has been made! It is international!
grass rooted, calling but walked upon …
springing back up into the calling air …
but CALLING again … every society … every Heart
The Mother and mothers everywhere are calling …
Fathers drop war from your consciousness.
It has no future … It begets no future …

But … ITSELF!
And an Earthen hell is the result …
Over and over … again and again …

MEN! What more proof need be portrayed than that goriest
Glorious 20th Century …???

MEN…WHO ARE WE THAT WE CAN”T SEE
IN ALL THIS LIGHT???!!!

Wali Qutbuddin Loren Ruh Smith
August 6, 2014

Qutbuddin Loren Ruh Smith: I'm 75 years old, born in Tacoma, WA and went to high school in Arcata, CA. I served in the US Army, met my first wife and had our first son in France. I started writing poetry in my first college English class in 1961. I've published a book called The Path to The Beloved and I have several books ready to publish. I lived in the Sierras in Grass Valley for 30 years before moving to Albuquerque, NM, in 2012. My book about fathers and sons called This Child and His Tree will be going to the publishers shortly.

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BOYHOOD: Not Exactly a Film Review

GUEST POST: by Peter Clothier

Originally published at the Buddha Diaries

(for Luka, a bit later in his life)

I woke this morning thinking about Barack Obama, and how perfectly he fits the model of manhood proposed by Rudyard Kipling in his unjustly maligned and frequently parodied poem “If.” In case you don't remember it, here's how it starts out:

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise…

Doesn't that sound like Obama?

First, though, Boyhood, which provoked these thoughts. We finally got to see this beautiful and profoundly moving film last night. I loved the twelve-year journey of these skillful and committed actors, playing out the emotional development of fictional characters engaged in a fictional narrative as they themselves physically aged. I loved the “truth” of the story itself, of a family struggling with the realities of life—the failed and failing marriages, the financial woes, the abuse of alcohol and drugs, sibling love and feuding, school and the relationships with classmates, the pain of the teenage years, and so on. All along, start to finish, the story had the convincing “feel” of life as most of us experience it.

And the film is true to its title. It is about boyhood. Even at the end, the young boy, Mason, whose life we have been following from elementary school to college has not yet emerged fully into manhood. The last shot shows him, literally high in the beautiful natural surroundings of the mountains, and high on the mushroom fed him by his brand new college roommate. With a lovely young woman at his side—they sit still shyly side by side and not in some false, premature embrace—he gazes out in ecstasy into the landscape as though into a future filled with allure. But it is abundantly clear that he is still a boy. Boyhood still glows in his face; he's all promise, no completion.

Which should not surprise us. He had no models of real manhood as he was growing up. Mason's biological father is a charming rogue in his early years, unable to accept the responsibilities of marriage, job, and family. The subsequent relationships his mother forms are with men whose manhood is as questionable as his father's: a smooth academic whose insecurities lead him to drunken tyranny; a former military man whose immaturity is revealed in his insensitivity and inflexibility. With one notable exception—a photography teacher who attempts to move our Mason beyond his obstinate, lethargic adolescence—the strong, mature figures who surround the growing boy are women. The men are simply grown-up little boys.

Which leads me to reflect, beyond the parameters of the movie, upon this question: what are the qualities of manhood? We find what I think of as a real man all too infrequently in our contemporary world. We are surrounded everywhere by ungrown men: the drunks, the abusers, the workaholics; priests and teachers who take advantage of their positions of trust and exploit the vulnerabilities of children; lovers who take what they need and reject responsibility; politicians who lack the spine to govern and capitulate too easily to those who would manipulate them; gun-toting idiots who insist so stridently on their “rights” and are quick to spurn the rights of others; sports heroes pumped up with illicit drugs and phony testosterone; spoiled cultural idols, many of them scarcely more than teenagers.

Too often, the models of manhood we are offered are characterized by a false notion of strength. To return to the President and his current predicament, surrounded as he is by well-meaning progressives to the left and fanatics blinded by their own rectitude on the right, all nipping at his heels and demanding displays of strength. They fail to understand that the qualities of true strength are not intellectual inflexibility and rash, foolhardy action (the former President and his enablers come inevitably to mind) but the maturity to step back and take the longer view, the wisdom to listen and, when necessary, to change. Even to bend. That too is strength. They have not learned the ancient lesson of the oak tree and the reed .

The qualities of manhood, in my view, are these: integrity, a sense of mission, a devotion to service. We know how to teach these qualities. We do it with our military men in boot camp (women, too, these days, of course, but I'm concerned here with men.) While I'm not a fan of militarism in any form, I'll concede that in most cases even this crass form of initiation can produce admirable men—men who have not only strength and skills, but a sense of purpose greater than themselves. Our armed forces are worthy of the respect that they receive. What turns boys to men is this kind of ritualized initiation—a process that's significantly lacking in the development of the youngster who's portrayed in “Boyhood,” as it is to the majority of us today. Of myself, if I'm to be honest, I must acknowledge that I reached some measure of manhood only in my fifties. For genuine initiation in our culture we have substituted such tepid rituals as Christian confirmations and bar mitvahs.

They don't do the trick. In traditional cultures, the transition was a far more dangerous journey, involving genuine threat to life and limb as boys were sent out into wilderness or jungle to temper the vulnerability and fearfulness of boyhood into the steel they would need to function as a man. We in the modern Western world have no wild animals to deal with, unless we count those within. We forget that these are powerful enough to rule our lives if we don't learn to acknowledge and confront them. The early myth of initiation for us is the ordeal of the knight apprentice, who rides out into the forest to test his mettle against the dark knight—or the dragon—and returns prepared to serve his queen.

What is integrity? In simple terms, it is the fortitude to say fearlessly exactly what I mean, and do exactly what I say. Which implies, of course, a clear vision about who I am and what I am given to do. If I'm in doubt or confusion, I lack resolve. I dither. The answer lies not in denying doubt and confusion—they are a part of being human. No one escapes them. In denying them I risk precipitous and futile action, when what I need first is to consult the inner wisdom that I've wrestled with myself to find, and rediscover the clarity before I act. A man of integrity is a man who “has his act together,” in the sense that his actions are in full congruence with his words. He has “integrated” the four mainstays of his being: mind and body, feeling and spirit, and they are properly in balance. Action that is not backed by all four of these in unison–action that lacks thought, or heart, or energy, or purpose–is as ineffectual as the failure to act at all.

Inseparable from a man's integrity, then, is the understanding that he has left behind the innocence of boyhood, along with the freedom that accompanied it. He lives in a world of accountability to others and acknowledges his duty (yes, sorry, a quaint, old-fashioned concept!) to serve others than himself. Sadly, it's true that most of us fail to live up to this ideal. We look around us, searching vainly for the most part for our Mahatma Gandhis, our Nelson Mandelas, our Martin Luther Kings—men who were certainly not lacking in the failings that made them human, but who managed to be magnificently greater than their weaknesses, and of spectacular, historical service to their fellow human beings.

We cannot all be men like these, but we can be men. Without the challenge of traditional initiation rites, we are required to find, or invent, our own journey from boyhood into manhood. It is no easy task to face the darkness and the inner demons that, without our awareness, can control our destinies. All of us need some form of support as we make that journey: a church, perhaps, a spiritual guide, a trained therapist… And the journey, for most of us, is never ending. Who can sit back on his laurels and say with certainty: I have reached the fullness of my manhood? Even in, at best, my last quarter here among the living, I still struggle with my own.

So we leave our young protagonist, in “Boyhood,” with the journey into manhood still ahead of him. He may already have been initiated into sex and drugs, into the drudgery of work and now, finally, the college dormitory, but none of these has opened the door to the real, deep, inner work he will have to do if he is to become the man he needs to be if he is to fulfill his life's destiny. And that is yet to come…

Watch for Peter Clothier's forthcoming novel about masculine sexuality, “The Pilgrim's Staff” (an old euphemism for the penis.) It's told by two narrators, a contemporary figure painter and and 18th century English gentleman. Frank sex scenes and potboiler excitement! Peter is a 1994 NWTA initiate, a one-time active Ritual Elder, and a well-known art writer. His latest book, “Slow Looking: The Art of Looking at Art,” explores the values of contemplation and meditation. Feel free to write him at peter clothier@mac.com .

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The Transformational Power of Daily Rituals

By Gonzalo Salinas

According to Charles Duhigg author of The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business , approximately 40% of what we do every day, we do unconsciously. We have formed a habit that we tend to repeat every day, and it's making our choices for us.

So, think about all the things you do every day. Some of them probably don't serve your highest purpose but still, you repeat them religiously … even knowing specific behaviors are putting you away of the reality you want to live. Duhigg explains that every time you repeat those habits your brain reinforces them … so it craves, later on, this repetition. Even if is not beneficial, you get a neuro-chemical reward in your brain that not only will create some sort of addiction but also reinforces the identity you have created for yourself.

I have tried many times to change bad habits and create new ones. With a sincere heart I must confess that I have failed more times than I have succeeded. But I noticed something happened every time I was succeeding; the positive new habits were daily rituals.

Sì. I do have rituals. Ritual – “a series of actions or type of behavior regularly and invariably followed by someone.” I repeat certain rituals every day, and believe me dear reader of the MKP Journal, to repeat an action every day, is not an easy task, especially when I am trying to create a new self.

Let me share some daily rituals hoping that this will inspire action to enhance lives.

I do my rituals first thing in the morning: I wake up and I go for a run. The running part is simple. I already told myself that as soon as I hear the alarm I must jump out of the bed. At the beginning it was hard, now is automatic. My recommendation is to avoid dealing with ANY logistics – so your sportswear must be ready next to the bed from the previous night.

rising-sun

A second ritual is: I carry in my wallet one handwritten page. One side of the page is divided in two: on the left side I have a few statements: my flaws or weaknesses to become aware of what I want to change, and on the right side my good qualities and virtues to remind myself the tools I have for my own growth. Deliberately this second list is bigger than the first one. On the other side of the paper I've written a brief composition about who I want to be. I've included goals and projects and a description of how I see myself in the next three years.

I read this paper three times a day. As soon as I wake up, at lunch time, and before I go to sleep. It takes me two minutes each reading. When I read it I focus on staying present: just reading.

Third: In the morning I also do a brief visualization … right before I come back from running I stop and I visualize: It takes me three to five minutes. I visualize the same three goals I have written on the paper I carry on my wallet.

Finally, is my gratitude time. On a notebook I got specifically for gratitude, right before I go to sleep, I write three things that I'm grateful for that day. It doesn't matter if it's as simple as “the kid I saw having some ice cream at Lincoln road in South Beach.” If I feel like writing it, I write it. Then I say a brief prayer, and I go to sleep.

These four rituals have changed my life   dramatically in the last two years. Have I been 100% consistent with them?… absolutely not. I used to give to myself a guilt trip, this usually led me to abandon my regular practice for a while. If for some reason I miss my rituals now, instead of the self punishment, I just carry on.

Questo è tutto. Just a couple of thing before I finish: You may notice that my rituals are very simple; they are simple because when I create a complex plan, I find I'm planning to fail. Start small and keep going; it is a great exercise of self love.

And lastly, be creative with your rituals! Some people create a vision boards with images, others do mantras or incantations, others meditate or do breathing exercises. The rituals become habits because of repetition, and the daily practice causes transformation.

I've got more from my 2 years of rituals than from my entire previous life without them. Use them and then you tell me!

Gonzalo photo

Gonzalo Salinas is an Assistant Editor for the ManKind Project Journal, a publication of the ManKind Project, a nonprofit mentoring and training organization offering powerful opportunities for men's personal growth at any stage of life. Salinas studied Literature in Lima, Peru at San Marcos University, and has been living in the United States since 2003. He lives in Miami, FL. Salinas is committed to his own personal development, and to spreading the word about the vision and mission of the Mankind Project .

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Your Distraction Vortex – Purpose Block #3

by Chris Kyle

If you missed the special Live Q&A call on April 15 for the Man on Purpose Course and want to listen to the audio, go to the Man on Purpose Course web site to listen.

Over the last week, I've shared with you the first two core Purpose Blocks which are:

Purpose Block #1 = the Fear Triad
Purpose Block #2 = the Doubting Voice

Now it's time to explore the third of the 3 Purpose Blocks. Purpose Block #3 is the Distraction Vortex .

In our modern, media-saturated and technology-driven culture we have a never-ending list of things we can do in our daily lives to keep us busy and our schedules extremely full.

The daily choices are mind-boggling … TV shows, books, internet surfing, sports, phone calls, porn, email, movies, hobbies — and on and on and on. And all of this is in addition to our daily work (that hopefully pays the bills).

All these possible activities make up the Distraction Vortex: a swirling pool of constant and seemingly endless things TO DO … that can suck up all of our precious time.

None of these activities, in and of themselves, are inherently “good” or “bad.” However, if we are spending much of our time in the Distraction Vortex — there is a good chance that we are also distracting ourselves from what we might want most in our lives: deeper connection, greater joy, more meaning, and a clearer sense of purpose.

And because the journey into these states can be more subtle and unclear, it's frankly easier and likely more soothing to numb-out or check-out with a juicy distraction like a TV show, a series of YouTube videos, or a trashy novel.

The challenge and question is, “How do I consciously navigate this Distraction Vortex, so it doesn't suck up all of my time — and instead frees up my time for focusing on living more fully into my purpose?”

Here are three steps you can take to help set you free from the Distraction Vortex.

1. Slow Down and Observe Your Activity
The first step is to use whatever stillness practice you have, like meditation or mindfulness, to slow yourself down each day (and if you don't have one, then start one), and begin to observe what pulls your attention toward what you would consider unhealthy distractions.

Then take on a one week “distraction awareness practice” by tracking where you are spending your time in the activities that you consider distractions. This brings to conscious awareness what activities YOU use as distractions to not face something else in your life.

2. Notice What You're Avoiding
The second step is to notice what you may be avoiding in your life that the distractions helps you not have to face. It is typically something you don't want to look at, and which makes you uncomfortable… something that you struggle with in your life.

Being more conscious of the activity, feeling or the energy that you're avoiding helps to burst the bubble on your distraction patterns. Now you have the awareness to make a new choice about whether to engage the specific distractions or not.

3. Recommit with Support
As you see more clearly how your particular distractions don't serve you, you can now recommit yourself to the actions and activities that truly support and serve you — your own growth and your purpose.

By declaring your commitment to the activities that feed your passions and purpose to another person close to you helps you stay accountable to not slipping back into the unhealthy distractions. This support is key to breaking out of the Distraction Vortex.

In the Man on Purpose Course, starting tomorrow (April 17, 2014), we spend two of the 7 weeks on looking at the patterns and habits that take us out of the fuller expression of our authentic power, creativity and purpose. This helps clear the way to bringing more energy and power to our purpose.

To your distraction-free purpose,
Chris

PS The Man on Purpose Course starts tomorrow, April 17th, and there's still time to register and lock in your seat in the course. Go here to register for the course. One man who took the course last year said:

“The course opened me up to the desire and passion to start living as a man who lives to be more of service in all aspects of life. Not “what is my purpose?” but rather how to LIVE with purpose!” — Edward Werger

Chris Kyle

Chris has trained and coached hundreds of individuals to achieve greater success in their businesses and their lives. In partnership with The ManKind Project® USA, he recently created The Power of Purpose Summit and the Man On Purpose online course. He is also the co-creator, with Amy Ahlers, of the ongoing tele-series, New Man, New Woman, New Life.

In addition to his leadership development work, Chris has spent over 24 years as an executive, entrepreneur, consultant and business coach, working in Fortune 500 companies and owning his own eco-adventure travel company. Chris graduated from Stanford University where he studied Political Science. He lives with his wife in Northern California.

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Curious about Why you are Here? Special Q&A Call!

Special Q&A Call Tonight & Important Announcement

We've received a lot of great questions over the last week around the topic of purpose and wanting to know more about our upcoming course — Man On Purpose: The Essential 7-Week Online Course for Men which starts on April 17th.

As I mentioned in my last post, George Daranyi and I will be hosting a special interactive Q&A call tonight – Tuesday April 15th. We will be answering some of the most frequently asked questions about the course, and also about how you can access your hidden power to activate your passions and purpose in the world.

If you have any lingering questions about the course, please join this special Q&A call TONIGHT, MARCH 15TH at 5:30 pm Pacific Time to get the answers you need.

===========================================

Here's how to access the Q&A Session with George and me:

TONIGHT at 5:30 pm Pacific / 8:30 pm Eastern / 12:30 am+1 UTC

To listen by webcast online, go to:

http://InstantTeleseminar.com/?eventid=54169320

To listen by phone dial:
Number: (425) 440-5100
Access code: 405934#

============================================

A number of men who have experienced the work with us were eager to share how it had improved and changed their lives:

«Mi hanno fatto vedere come avessi dormito per la maggior parte della mia vita, e come avevo bisogno di" svegliare "e farsi carico della mia vita, di assumersi la responsabilità ed essere responsabile delle mie azioni. Nel programma, ho ricevuto gli strumenti per tornare in integrità con la mia famiglia, i miei amici, e soprattutto con me stesso ... Ho imparato che per fare la differenza in questo mondo, a vivere nel mio scopo, in primo luogo ho dovuto cambiare me stesso "-. Joe A.

"L'approccio di Chris 'mi ha aiutato a vedere dove non sto rivelando pienamente nella mia vita e le ombre che mi stavano trattenendo. La sua intuizione e la consapevolezza mi ha guidato a confrontarsi con queste ombre e mi ha aiutato a rimanere presente, anche quando era scomodo. Con l'aiuto di Chris, ho trovato il mio bordo in crescita e imparato a prendere quello che ho vissuto nelle sedute nella mia vita professionale e sociale, le mie relazioni intime e soprattutto, il mio viaggio interiore. Sperimentando questo luogo di "profonda knowingness", le finalità e feroce amore, ho sperimentato l'essenza della mia vera natura. "- Tim C.

Volevo anche farvi sapere che la nostra opzione 3 di pagamento si conclude questo Venerdì. Quindi, se avete intenzione di iscriversi al corso e potrebbe beneficiare della possibilità di diffondere i pagamenti oltre tre mesi, assicuratevi di iscriversi entro domani per approfittare di questa opportunità.

Per saperne di più e registrarsi visitare la pagina informazioni corso.

Per vivere il vostro scopo,
Chris Kyle & George Daranyi

Chris Kyle

Chris ha addestrato e allenato centinaia di persone per ottenere un maggiore successo nelle loro imprese e le loro vite. In collaborazione con il genere umano Project® Stati Uniti d'America, ha recentemente creato il potere di Intenti Summit e il Man On Purpose corso online. Egli è anche il co-creatore, con Amy Ahlers, del corso tele-serie, New Man, New Woman, New Life.

Oltre al suo lavoro di sviluppo della leadership, Chris ha trascorso oltre 24 anni come dirigente, imprenditore, consulente e business coach, che lavorano in aziende Fortune 500 e possedere la propria agenzia di viaggi eco-avventura. Chris si è laureato presso la Stanford University, dove ha studiato Scienze Politiche. Vive con la moglie nel Nord della California.

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Quello che si è tenuta dal Incredulità Voice? - Scopo Block # 2

Se vi siete persi il primo post: ecco i 3 blocchi Scopo:
The Fear Triade
Incredulità di San Voice
The Vortex Distraction

Mentre avanziamo lungo il nostro sentiero scopo viaggio siamo probabile imbattersi in secondo blocco scopo: Incredulità di San Voice.

Questo Dubitare Voice dentro si potrebbe suonare come questo:

  • Pensi davvero che si può vivere il vostro scopo - quello di fare abbastanza soldi per la famiglia?
  • Sembra troppo rischioso cambiare carriera ora ... perché si vuole fare questo?
  • Dove si ottiene il supporto di assumere questo nuovo progetto?
  • Che cosa succede se non funziona?
  • Pensi di avere il talento per scrivere il tuo libro, è davvero difficile ...

In sostanza, questo voce interiore è quella parte del nostro modello di pensiero che è in discussione negativamente tutto quello che diciamo o facciamo.

E il problema è che quando il vostro Doubting Voice si scontra con la vostra vocazione, il vostro scopo dispiegarsi, allora vuole trovare tutti i modi per impedirti di andare al "bordo sconosciuto" - ai luoghi che dovrete estendere te stesso, a rischio, e di crescere in modo probabile disagio.

La missione del Doubting Voice è quello di eliminare il rischio, mantenere le cose il "sicuro", e di non essere a disagio. Questo, ovviamente, si pone in contrasto con se stessi, a volte, e perché si tratta di un blocco di base per vivere il vostro scopo.

Quindi, come lavoriamo con e neutralizzare la nostra Incredulità Voice?

Ho scoperto che il modo migliore per lavorare con il Dubbio Voice è di fare amicizia con lui.

Lo so, più facile a dirsi che a farsi. Ma qui è il mio processo di be-friending, o detto in altro modo, integrando la mia Doubter interiore.

Inizia con denominazione del Dubbio voce in te. Si potrebbe chiamare: Dubbio Amico, o Cantankerous Cathy, o semplicemente il signor Doubter. Quello che fa è duplice:

Porta leggerezza e umorismo per quella parte di noi stessi che è abbastanza pesante e un limitatore per la nostra piena, autentica espressione
Consente parte testimonianza di se stessi per arrivare in modo da poter vedere la prospettiva più grande oltre il vostro timoroso, dubitare pensieri ego-mente / voci.

Poi è il momento di avere un breve dialogo con il Doubter. Scorre come questo:

"Sig. Doubter, do you have some true wisdom for me that I should know about?” Here you're investigating for important information that might be in the doubting voice. A grain of truth that you feel may be important to the issue at hand. Listen to what comes back.

Then say to yourself: “Thank you for sharing. I don't need you at this time. I'm now going to make room for a choice that is for my highest good – my empowered choice.”

And now there is space for you to make a new choice toward your purpose, toward that which brings you more alive.

In the Man on Purpose Course , George Daranyi and I will speak on how to turn your negative inner voices (what we call Inner Bullies) into allies for your growth and expansion. So, I encourage you to let your Doubting Voice be the new fuel for your growth, for a deeper self-acceptance, that will bring more energy and clarity to your purpose work.

To your purpose adventure,
Chris

PS George and I are hosting a special live Q&A Call on Tuesday, April 15th at 5:30 pm PT / 8:30 pm ET to answer all your questions about the upcoming Man on Purpose Course , which starts on April 17th. Mark you calendars now and we'll be sending out Access Details on Monday. Go here to learn more and register for the course.

Chris Kyle

Chris has trained and coached hundreds of individuals to achieve greater success in their businesses and their lives. In partnership with The ManKind Project® USA, he recently created The Power of Purpose Summit and the Man On Purpose online course. He is also the co-creator, with Amy Ahlers, of the ongoing tele-series, New Man, New Woman, New Life.

In addition to his leadership development work, Chris has spent over 24 years as an executive, entrepreneur, consultant and business coach, working in Fortune 500 companies and owning his own eco-adventure travel company. Chris graduated from Stanford University where he studied Political Science. He lives with his wife in Northern California.

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What stops you from claiming or more fully living your purpose?

The challenge I see constantly with people who want clarity of purpose, or want to bring more energy or focus to it, is that there's at least one BIG block   (if not several) in their life that's keeping them from being fully engaged and lit up by their purpose.

I'd like to share with you the top 3 Purpose Blocks   that I've discovered through the purpose work I've done with hundreds of people over the years; and then how to move through these blocks. Today I'll focus on Purpose Block #1.

Here are the 3 Purpose Blocks:

  1. The Fear Triad
  2. The Doubting Voice
  3. The Distraction Vortex

Purpose Block #1 is the Fear Triad . I have consistently found three specific fears that people face when diving into discovering their purpose, OR when they are trying to put the vision of their purpose into action in the world. The three core purpose fears are:

  • Fear of Survival (mostly financial)
  • Paura di fallire
  • Fear of Ridicule

The survival instinct is deeply rooted in our old brain, the reptilian brain, and is now, in our modern culture, mostly connected with our financial resources.

So the Fear of Survival   unfolds like this: If you choose to go after your purpose, living it fully, then it may drain ALL your resources and/or not be sustainable in the future, and you won't “make it” — you won't survive. You won't be able to pay the bills and feed your family. So, it's just easier to avoid the question about purpose altogether than to face the possibility that you might not survive by living the “fantasy” of your purpose.

The Fear of Failure inside our purpose exploration can become more pronounced because the call of our purpose may stretch us into unknown areas, or test us with new approaches or concepts.

It may unfold like this: If you go for what you really want, your purpose, and fail; then you've failed on the really BIG one in life — living your purpose.” This would not just be failing on a project or a task, but may have the sense of a “whole-person failure” — the message being: “I am a failure in my life.”
The Fear of Ridicule unfolds like this: if your purpose is calling you to do something different in your life, to take on a new vision for your life with a new set of actions, you may find yourself misunderstood by family, friends, colleagues and maybe even your partner.

This exposes you to people's reactions, their own fear and their ridicule. The fear may arise that you'll be laughed, belittled or rejected because your ideas seem non-conventional or simply strange to others.
So, here is the 3-step flow of how to work with these natural fears in the Fear Triad:

> Awareness of the Fear
Notice and acknowledge the fear. It is important to pause yourself and take a deeper look inside at what these fears are for you. Name them in your OWN way and in your words. Bringing them out of the shadow and into the light of your conscious mind is the first step.

> Allow and Embrace
Once you are aware of your unique flavor of the fear, then you're ready to embrace this fear as simply a part of you and a mechanism that your ego-mind uses to keep you safe.

This means accepting the fear with self-compassion and seeing it as a natural part of your growth and evolution as a human being. It's important for you to watch your tendency to push the fear away, to deny it or pretend it's not there.

> Open to a New Choice
As you allow and embrace your fear, it begins to lose its hold and power over you. It may still be there, but it's been seen, named and embraced. So, now it's time to make a new choice that supports your highest growth and calling in the moment.

What you thought was just not possible before because of one of these fears, now may seem possible. Make a NEW choice that serves you and your passionate, creative expression.

In the Man on Purpose 7-Week Online Course we teach you a powerful tool called the Reframing Process that will help you reframe your fear messages and shift them to new possibilities and new choices.
Go to our course information page to learn more.

Chris Kyle

Chris has trained and coached hundreds of individuals to achieve greater success in their businesses and their lives. In partnership with The ManKind Project® USA, he recently created The Power of Purpose Summit and the Man On Purpose online course. He is also the co-creator, with Amy Ahlers, of the ongoing tele-series, New Man, New Woman, New Life.

In addition to his leadership development work, Chris has spent over 24 years as an executive, entrepreneur, consultant and business coach, working in Fortune 500 companies and owning his own eco-adventure travel company. Chris graduated from Stanford University where he studied Political Science. He lives with his wife in Northern California.

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Wake up call

Category: Memoir

by Gonzalo Salinas

Every morning after my run on the beach and my morning rituals, as I drive to work, I see the kids from the South Beach Elementary crossing the street, I see the cuban windows full of people buying their morning cafe cubano , I see the many yoga fans carrying their mat to their morning practice and I see the magic atmosphere of the beach waking up and starting the day.

I cross the MacArthur causeway admiring the breathtaking view, with the Miami skyline and the port of Miami on one side and the mansions in front of the ocean and the Miami bay on the other one. I take the I95, my usual shortcut to the roads in Coral Way to get to my office.

I'm grateful for all the things I get to see every morning. Perché? Because everything I get to see every day is a blessing. I know it firsthand…

south beach

When I was a kid, I absolutely loved to play. I was always organizing the games. I remember always playing with my older brothers, with my friends or my cousins. Inventing games, running, jumping, screaming … one of my favorites was playing soccer with a paper ball covered in duct tape. I was always busy being a kid.

Sometimes at school, the bell rang earlier than usual. I was very happy because I had the chance to go home and play, but, at that young age, I wasn't aware of how dangerous the reason was of why they were sending us home hours before the end of the school day.

My grade school was threatened by the terrorist movements of Shining Path or the Tupac Amaru Revolutionary Movement. Both terrorist groups that had taken my city, Lima, and were destroying everything they touched. When they threatened the school, the only solution was sending everyone home for the day. Most of the time, these were false alarms, somebody calling for no reason, but in the rest of the city, you couldn't go to a cafe or a restaurant because the terrorist were bombing the commercial areas, public offices, banks, private companies and every public place you could possibly imagine, spreading chaos and terror all over Lima and the rest of the country.

I grew up on that environment, without being aware of the constant risk that was just walking on the streets of my city. In 12 years of horror from 1980 to 1992, the result was approximately 70 thousand people killed. Fortunately the Peruvian government was able to bring the terror to an end.

There are many places in the world right now, like Pakistan, Iraq or Somalia where terrorism is part of the daily life. I feel so blessed to live where I live now. And I am awake – awake to the reality that not everyone experiences the world I live in. And I am also responsible for staying awake.

So every morning, I am grateful for what I see on my way to work. Gratitude, for me, is the opposite of fear. Be grateful for what you have and send your positive energies or say a prayer for those places where terror is the reality. I pray for a world where all the kids can go to the streets, and play.

Gonzalo photo

Gonzalo Salinas is an Assistant Editor for the ManKind Project Journal, a publication of the ManKind Project, a nonprofit mentoring and training organization offering powerful opportunities for men's personal growth at any stage of life. Salinas studied Literature in Lima, Peru at San Marcos University, and has been living in the United States since 2003. He lives in Miami, FL. Salinas is committed to his own personal development, and to spreading the word about the vision and mission of the Mankind Project .

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Lighting the Darkness – Lumos

Guest Post

New Warrior Brother Michael Marlin from Hawaii will enlighten audiences with his stage production of LUMA: Art in Darkness during a ten-city tour at performing art centers across the country beginning March 28th.

A top comedy juggler who played Las Vegas and opened for the likes of Jay Leno, Jerry Seinfeld, George Carlin, and REM, Marlin walked away from his successful solo career in 1986. He sold his house in Redondo Beach, CA and moved to the island of Hawaii to co-found an alternative community while building and living in a tree house with no electricity.

In 1989 while standing on an active lava flow he noticed the hypnotic effect it had on people and had the epiphany, “All life is drawn to light.”

This was the genesis of LUMA, a show that has now appeared in 15 countries, 44 states and has been touring since 1998. LUMA, with a cast of seven, is a show about the subject of light that combines all manner of physical disciplines from rhythmic gymnastics, puppetry, magic, dance, acrobatics, physics and experimental methods.

Fused with a myriad of light technology from incandescent to bioluminescent, from LEDs to lasers, the tour will take it from Arizona to Massachusetts over a five-week period.

“Three years ago Marlin came to Houston and opened with his juggling act,” Sonny Elliot, a ManKind Project ritual elder recalls, “[LUMA] was a brilliant and over-the-top performance. With the 'visual' music and 'technical' dancing, along with the crowd's enthusiasm, it was a home run.”

In manifesting his vision of LUMA, Marlin encountered a lot of skepticism. He has stayed true to his brainchild, expanding the show and building on new technology as it has evolved, watching as other artists have recently flirted with some of the theatrical light elements he has pioneered, popularizing it on shows like “America's Got Talent”.

Marlin has long been a pioneer and visionary. His work in the field of comedy and juggling back in the 70's and early 80's influenced a generation of jugglers who followed. Barry Friedman from the ManKind Project in Northern California and half of the juggling duo “The Raspini Brothers”, reports, “I remember standing in our family kitchen when I was 18 years old and seeing Michael Marlin on a TV show called Real People.”

“It showed me a bigger picture of what was possible if I stuck with juggling: the possibility of having fun and making people laugh. Marlin has continued to raise the bar both artistically and professionally. His show LUMA has brilliantly merged the visual appeal of juggling with the mind-boggling technology of electronically controlled lighting.”

COME SEE LUMOS

Come see LUMOS this spring.

“The journey to take a vision bigger than one person can pull off and turn it into a physical manifestation with so many moving parts was daunting,” says Marlin. “The work I have done in the ManKind Project has helped me in an incalculable way in my ability to lead others in a clean way and not pull my hair out, (or theirs) when things don't go as planned.”

“I have no doubt that the ripples Marlin is making in the lives of both his audiences and the members of his cast will spread out and touch millions of lives,” said Friedman.

Ticket information and videos of LUMA can be found online at http://www.lumatheater.com .

Show Schedule:

March 26th Gilbert, AZ – Higley Center
April 4th Ft. Collins, CO – Lincoln Center
April 6th Santa Fe, NM – Lensic Theater
April 7th Las Vegas, NM – University of New Mexico Highland Center
April 11th Chippewa Falls, WI – Heyde Center
April 12th Madison, WI – Barrymore Theater
April 13th Schaumberg, IL – Prairie Performing Arts Center
April 20/21st Roanoke, VA – Jefferson Center
April 27th Storrs, CT – University of Connecticut Jorgensen Center
April 29th Queens, NY – Queens College
May 2nd Worcester, MA – Hanover Theater

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Video: “The Revolution is Love” with Charles Eisenstein

shared by Chris Kyle

This powerful 4-minute video features Charles Eisenstein, author of Sacred Economics , from a documentary about the Occupy Movement. Charles will be a featured speaker at the ManKind Project USA's upcoming Power of Purpose Online Summit in March 2014 (more details are coming soon).

I love Charles' last line of this video clip: “…Everybody has a unique calling and it's really time to listen to that. That's what the future is going to be. It's time to get ready for it, and contribute to it, and help make it happen.”

Charles Eisenstein is a teacher, speaker, and writer focusing on themes of civilization, consciousness, money, and human cultural evolution. He is the author of 6 books includingSacred Economics, The Ascent of Humanity and The More Beautiful World Our Hearts Know Is Possible.

“Remember that self-doubt is as self-centered as self-inflation. Your obligation is to reach as deeply as you can and offer your unique and authentic gifts as bravely and beautifully as you're able.”
— Bill Plotkin, author of Soulcraft*

* Bill is also speaking at the Power of Purpose Summit in March.

Chris Kyle

Chris has trained and coached hundreds of individuals to achieve greater success in their businesses and their lives. In partnership with The ManKind Project® USA, he recently created The Power of Purpose Summit and the Man On Purpose online course. He is also the co-creator, with Amy Ahlers, of the ongoing tele-series, New Man, New Woman, New Life.

In addition to his leadership development work, Chris has spent over 24 years as an executive, entrepreneur, consultant and business coach, working in Fortune 500 companies and owning his own eco-adventure travel company. Chris graduated from Stanford University where he studied Political Science. He lives with his wife in Northern California.

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My Elder Soul ~ a poem

Category: Men as Elders , Poetry

by Reuel Czach

Elders, we are losing our Soul.
We are so caught up individually in petty offenses
and bickering and wounded-ness,
that we are letting our civilization and our planet die.
But most importantly,
we are letting our souls die.

When I chose to be wounded,
and walk through life withdrawn in my cave,
or I choose to be over-armored,
to the point of being weighed down,
with such heavy baggage,
nothing else matters,
…..my soul is lost.

I chose to take a step toward claiming,
my lost soul,
when I chose to meet with men in an honest, open circle.

I choose my soul,
when I decide to be so humble,
that no one can offend me.

I choose my soul,
when I chose wisdom,
over being right.

I choose my soul,
when I chose service,
over selfishness.

I choose my soul,
when I chose looking within,
to find all the evil I see outside myself.

I choose my soul,
when I walk the path of life,
where I am nothing,
and I am everything,
in sacred balance.
My choices mean everything,
my offenses mean nothing.

My offenses mean I still have inner work to do
and for the sake of generations to come,
I better get it done as quickly as possible.

My choices mean I have the power to save myself,
my loved ones, my friends, and possibly many more people,
from a mean, selfishness and a lonely death.

I feel great sadness and sorrow,
for all that is being lost.

While the distractions of hurt,
wounded-ness and bickering,
suck so much energy out of my soul,
…..and the soul of my people.

Every hurt and wound and chance to be right,
is a mirror of my soul,
and an opportunity to heal.

Fallo! Choose healing.
Then choose wisdom and kindness,
and be the Elder you were meant to be.

Distractions are my enemy,
anything that tries to pull me off,
my narrow mission.

I just need to let Spirit control my life,
where my spirit joins and serves,
a much bigger wisdom,
than I could ever fully understand.

I am asked this day to request of myself,
and men who call themselves Elders.
A humble request,
that we focus on the wisdom to light a path,
for those who come after us.
Humble man, Jan 2014

Reuel Czach

Reuel Czach is a 60 year old, Christian man with a wonderful wife and two sons, a daughter and a stepson. He has lived in San Luis Obispo County, California for over 30 years and practiced architecture for most of those years. Czach is an I-Group Coordinator for the Swallow Creek Coastal Circle in Cayucos. He actively supports and builds the Elder community in San Luis Obispo and is the Co-Elder Chair of the MKP Santa Barbara Community. Czach leads a weekly men's circle in my church and is a leader in the men's ministry.

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