Besked fra din indre kriger

Social Del Tællere

af Gonzalo Salinas

Kære kriger:

Du behøver ikke at arbejde på din mission for at få tingene. Du behøver ikke arbejde på din mission for at få et ønsket resultat: Ikke berømmelse eller formue, ikke en helt ny bil, og heller ikke pigen. Du behøver ikke tilstand din mission til et resultat.

Hvad hvis du arbejder i din mission at få tingene og når du er færdig, får du ikke de ting? Eller endnu værre, du nå målet, får du de ting, men du får ikke opfyldelse? ...

Du ved bedre end det.

Dybt i dit hjerte, det er hvad du virkelig vide: Du arbejder på din mission, fordi det er der du er. Periode. Du ved, at din mission vil enten redder nogens liv eller vil gøre denne planet til et bedre sted at leve. Så du vågner op, du arbejder på din mission, uanset mængden af ​​tid, så længe du gør noget relateret til din mission i dag.

Og så skal du indse, at den lille mængde arbejde, du lægger på din mission i dag, er nok grund til at tillade dig selv at være glad lige nu. I morgen vil være en anden dag.

Kærlighed,

Din Indre Kriger

Gonzalo foto

Gonzalo Salinas er en assisterende redaktør for menneskeheden Project Journal, en offentliggørelse af menneskeheden Project, en nonprofit mentoring og uddannelse organisation, der tilbyder kraftfulde muligheder for mænds personlig vækst på alle stadier af livet. Salinas studerede litteratur i Lima, Peru på San Marcos University og har boet i USA siden 2003 Han bor i Miami, FL. Salinas er forpligtet til sin egen personlige udvikling, og at sprede ordet om den vision og mission Menneskeheden Project .

Mensaje de tu Guerrero Interiør

Kategori: Mænd og Mission
Social Del Tællere

por Gonzalo Salinas

Querido Guerrero:

Tú ingen trabajas da tu Misión para obtener cosas. Tú ingen trabajas da tu Misión para obtener NINGUN resultado. Ingen por Fama o fortuna, Ni por un carro nuevo ni para conseguir una mujer. Tú ingen condicionas tu Misión en un resultado.

¿Que pasaría si trabajas da tu Misión y al endelig ingen obtienes el resultado que Esperas? O-Peor Aun, ¿Que pasaría si luego de trabajar da tu Misión, obtienes la cosa y ello ingen te llena como esperabas? ... Tú Eres mejor que ESO.

En un lugar Profundo da tu Corazón, esto es lo que sabes: Tú trabajas da tu Misión porque ESO es quien tu eres. Así de enkel. Tú sabes que tu Misión salvará La Vida de alguien o que Hara que este Planeta hav un mejor lugar donde vivir. Entonces te despiertas, trabajas da tu Misión, synd importar El Tiempo que le dediques tan pronto como Hagas algo por tu Misión el Día de hoy.

Y luego te das cuenta, que ESE pequeño Monto de Trabajo que pusiste hoy da tu Misión, es Razon suficiente para autorizarte en ser feliz ahora mismo. Mañana Será otro día.

Con Amor,

Tu Guerrero Interiør

Gonzalo foto

Gonzalo Salinas er en assisterende redaktør for menneskeheden Project Journal, en offentliggørelse af menneskeheden Project, en nonprofit mentoring og uddannelse organisation, der tilbyder kraftfulde muligheder for mænds personlig vækst på alle stadier af livet. Salinas studerede litteratur i Lima, Peru på San Marcos University og har boet i USA siden 2003 Han bor i Miami, FL. Salinas er forpligtet til sin egen personlige udvikling, og at sprede ordet om den vision og mission Menneskeheden Project .

The Legacy Letters, magtfulde lektioner for at leve

Social Del Tællere

En god mand

En god mand


Redaktionel note af Boysen Hodgson: Barry Friedman emailet mig at fortælle mig, at jeg måtte få denne bog, The Legacy Letters af Carew Papritz, og læse det samme. Han mente, at dette var en vigtig bog for nye krigere, en bog, der taler til vores værdier som bevidste mænd, og på betydningen af at handle nu for at sikre, at de vigtigste ting, vi har at sige, er sagt.

Jeg foreslog, at Barry komme i kontakt med Carew, og rakte ud for at gøre forbindelsen ... og som sædvanlig ... Barry sprang ret i og over udført ... at sammensætte en stor interview med Carew herunder en særlig læsning af hans søn af en særligt gribende sektion af bogen.

Det er en stærk historie, fuld af visdom, undren, taknemmelighed og velsignelser. Lyt til interviewet, kan du læse uddrag nedenfor - og bestille dig en kopi af denne utrolige bog . Carew er sikker på at blive et stort navn. Han er allerede ude på vejen gør bog signings i hele landet.

Interview med Barry Friedman

Klik for det interview.

Uddrag fra brevet: On My Boy Becoming A Man

for menneskeheden Project

(Fra The Legacy bogstaver ved Carew Papritz)

Min Søn,

Som din far, jeg har så meget at fortælle dig, at vise dig, hvad det betyder at blive en mand. Forsøger at besvare alle dine nysgerrige-boy spørgsmål om dagens mysterier og undere med den perfekte papa-given blanding af præcision, enkelhed og klarhed. Ser du falde ned og stå og derefter falder igen som alle drenge skal gøre med sådan vildskab og evighed, at lejlighedsvis samle dig op, men ikke alt for ofte. Førende dig gennem den lange brand, der er dåb af min søn at blive en mand. Og en eller anden måde må jeg gøre alt dette gennem dødeligheden af ​​mine ord.

Med din mors nåde og nærhed, vil din søster lære hendes mor visdom. På en eller anden måde, min søn, jeg skal finde en måde at være ved siden af ​​dig. Flying tværs af en massiv canyon af hukommelse og tid, håber med al den styrke, klarhed og kærlighed jeg kan forgather som din far, jeg håber, at disse ord vil klogt guide dig hen imod en dag at blive din egen mand.

En eller anden måde, min søn, i vores halsbrækkende lyst for fremtiden for nu, vi fik det ind i vores hoveder, at ligesom at trykke på en knap eller indtaster et nummer, bliver en mand er nemt. Bare fortære et par dusin mand-bliver-helten film, pick-up en hurtig udseende bil, gør ud med en pige eller piger, lomme et par bukke, og gøre hvad du vil, når du vil-let. Som en konsekvens, vi slå ud af den perfekte en, der ligner en mand, taler som en mand, og selv lyder som en mand, men en eller anden måde fungerer som en Jack Brisling Billy-boy forkrøblede på toppen af ​​sin mandige modning, et sted mellem hormonelle toppunkt 12-23, som ikke har nogen ønsker, hældning, eller motivation til at tjene sine striber og blive et fuldgyldigt, voksen, tænker, tankevækkende, god mand. Nu er jeg ikke sige, at du nødt til at være pavens spejder eller John Waynes Muleskinner, men hvis du ikke er ved at lære eller ønsker at en dag blive en mand, så er du altid øve at forblive en dreng.

************************************************** *********

Så når bliver du en mand, min søn?

Har du bliver en mand ved at køre rundt sorteper nøgen i ørkenen i en uge, venter på nogle gud-vision om tre krager ride bareback på en tyr elg på solens stigende? Har du blive en mand ved at gå i krig for at knippelsuppe, skyde, bajonet, eller shish-kabob nogle dumme knægt din egen alder på den anden side, der også tænkt at gå i krig ville gøre ham til en mand? Har du bliver en mand ved souping den nyeste Chevy med en 327 under kølerhjelmen og piske nogle fattige spadestik i et midnat gade træk?

Nej, du bliver en mand, når du først beslutter at sætte tingene bort barndommens, snak om barndommen og tanker barndommen. Du beslutter, fordi du ikke kan blive behandlet som både en mand og en dreng. Fordi du er enten det ene eller det andet, men du er ikke begge. Og det er ligegyldigt din alder-du kan være et barn på femten eller fyrre. Først når du som dreng beslutte du er færdig venter den mand, du ønsker at være, og begynder at være den mand, du ønsker at blive, begynder du at blive en mand.

Hvornår bliver du en mand?

Når du bliver din egen mand.

Når andre mennesker stoler dig til at gøre en mands arbejde. Stole på dig med deres navn, deres omdømme, deres tanker. Stole på dig til at se ryggen og stoler på dig med deres liv.

At blive en mand er at udføre dit ord, fordi du gav dit ord. Og dine ord er dig som en mand.

Du bliver en mand det øjeblik du forstår, at ansvar er en reel og afgørende forpligtelse til dig selv og andre, og ikke nogle dovne-hund, alt enige grynt.

At blive en mand betyder at gøre det rigtige, selvom det kan være svært eller svært. Drenge gør, hvad er nemmest. En mand gør hvad der er rigtigt, uanset om let eller ej.

************************************************** *********

Og hvilken type menneske du bør være, min søn?

En god mand. Frem for alt andet, stræbe efter at være en god mand.

Og du behøver ikke blive en god mand natten over. Ligesom en stor, solid douglasgran du skal lære at modstå al ​​slags vind, regn, lyn, sol, og endda brand-år efter år efter år og stadig stå oprejst og sandt.

En god mand i din papa bog, er en stor mand. En, der konstant stræber efter at være den bedste af mændene, for sig selv og andre. Fordi verden aldrig kan få nok gode mænd.

Og hvad gør en god mand, min søn.

En god mand er at være retfærdig. I begge dine ord og dine handlinger.

Når du indrømmer at være forkert. Og så lige det forkert.

En god mand ved, hvornår han er blevet ydmyget, og lærer af hans ydmyghed.

At være en god mand betyder at tale med oprigtighed og kærlighed med sikkerhed.

En god mand vil forsøge at handle klogt ved at tænke først og derefter handler.

En god mand fortæller sandheden.

En god mand lever for den glæde i livet og lykken af ​​at være i live, ikke lænket til ønsker af fremtidens eller beklager fra fortiden.

En god mand forsvarer dem, der ikke kan forsvare sig selv.

Og en god mand kender vanskeligheden ved at være en mand, vel vidende faldet fra nåde er altid nær ved hånden, og dermed er altid stræber efter at gøre sig en bedre mand.

Og da jeg hurtigt bliver ældre, min søn, jeg kan se, at det at blive en mand, og det at være en mand til sidst og virkelig en i samme, og de prøver og test aldrig ende. Jeg ved i min fars hjerte, og på alle de andre steder, kan jeg ikke gå til i dette øjeblik, at jeg tror på dig med al min kærlighed, ligesom tid nu forsvinder før mig. Og jeg ved, at du en dag vil blive en mand til at gøre din papa stolt-din egen mand. Gåture tro mod dine egne overbevisninger, bærer dit navn stolt nogensinde loyale over for en tapper hjerte, og tro at det at være en god mand i dette liv er en stor bestræbelse. Og den pågældende dag, vil jeg nøjes med være med dig. Og en eller anden måde, vil jeg have været din far. Jeg elsker dig.

Papa

ENDELIG OBS!

Hvis du ønsker at få en hard-cover version af denne bog ... og ... 20% rabat, skal du bruge MANKIND1

Twin Brothers, The Horse Twins

Kategori: Digte
Social Del Tællere

af Rebecca

Twin Brothers, The Horse Twins

Den Ashvino
The Horse Twins
Twin Brothers
Tall, stærk,
Lang sort hår flyder
De er Ashvino
Ring til dine brødre,
Og de vil lede dig på din vej.

Ingen ved, hvor de Ashvino Twins bor.
De gør besøg til landsbyer
Som de strejfe frit.
Når de indtaster en by,
Børnene er de første til at vide.
De går kører på deres små fødder
Pattering, griner, breder med glæde.
De Ashvino Twins,
glødende sagte lyse ligesom eftermiddagssolen,
Brune øjne lyse,
Lege med dem, grine med dem.
De pluk børnene op til deres skuldre, og holde dem stramt.
De taler sande ord til dem,
Tale til dem,
aldrig over dem eller under dem,
Som børn altid ønsker at blive talt til.
Børn overalt kalde dem,
Vores Big Brothers.

De træder ind i hjemmene
Sent på eftermiddagen
Når solen står højt og gylden,
Når kvinder bager brød
Og gør aftensmad.
Kvinderne altid byde dem velkommen i
Fordi de ved, hvad Ashvino er.
De elsker dem,
På en anden måde end deres mænd,
På en måde anderledes end deres sønner.
Den Ashvino bringe deres børn med dem.
De bringer en stille, stærk glæde, der varer længe.
Når de forlader,
De jordovn vægge taler længe efter de er gået,
En dyb vibration
Beroligende, siger ting som ord aldrig kunne tale.
I et hus, hvor Ashvino har siddet,
Sygdom ikke vil indgive
Og formue af lange, varig lykke vil komme.
Twin Brothers bringe en varm, tilfreds, dyb fred.
De bringer lykke at penge eller rigdom
Kunne aldrig bringe.
Kvinderne kender dette.
De kender den Ashvino
De kender Twins.
Og det er grunden
Kvinderne er altid glade for at lade Twin Brothers.

Ingen ved, hvor hjem for Ashvino er.
Efter at de passerer gennem en landsby,
De går forbi udkanten
Ud i de rullende sletter,
Og de to brødre
Skift til heste.
De kører gratis i græsser,
I den brede flade af verden.
I tordenvejr,
De svælge i den dunkende regn
Deres hove er ligesom torden
Og deres hastighed er lynet.
Deres sorte manker er vinden.

I deres organer løber styrken af ​​en hest.
De ved, hvad det føles at være bytte
men de har i hovedet på en god menneskelig konge.
De har følt pigge af frygt i deres egen krop,
Og de er følsomme heste-
de er blide grund af det.
Og de ved følsom selvsikkerhed
er bedre end frygtsom kindness-
de kender uden den,
Heard falder i frygt og ufred.
De ved, hvad det er at være et rovdyr,
Og at som mænd er de eneste dyr på jorden
Det har et valg om det.
De er en hest og en mand i en,
det bedste af begge dele.
De er Ashvino.

Kvinder altid elske dem.
Men hvad mænd mener om dem
Afhænger af Man.
En jaloux mand siger,
"Kom ud af mit hus! Stop rode med min kvinde! "
En usikker mand ser tvillingernes let, varm tillid,
og føles tomt.
A mænd, der tror sig stærk,
men gør kun et billede af styrke på ydersiden, dommere og siger,
"De er ikke rigtig stærk. De er for blid, alt for venlig. "

Men en mand, der stræber efter at være frie, vild, venlige og stærk,
Hans hjerte længes efter dem
Fra dybt i hans sjæl.
Han ønsker at være ligesom dem.
Han ønsker at køre gratis ligesom dem.
Han ønsker at være stærk som dem.
Han ønsker at være venlige ligesom dem.

Ring til Ashvino
Og hesten Twins kommer kørende
Hurtigere end lynet
Rumlen dybt og langt som torden i jorden
Med den nemme varme eftermiddagssol,
Med hjertet af en hest
Og sindet af en mand,
De vil komme
Som jeres brødre
Og føre dig
På den måde, du længes efter at gå.

Rebecca er en kvinde, der hjerteligt støtter Mænds Movement. På hendes ord: "Vi har brug for det nu mere end nogensinde. Jeg er dybt ind jungianske studier, og jeg arbejder dagligt i retning af at leve et ansvarligt, fuld bevidst liv. Jeg har skrevet dette stykke på det sted, hvor mænd og kvinder rejser skærer hinanden. Vi gør ofte den samme ting i vores indre liv, mens du kigger på det fra lidt forskellige vinkler. De Ashvino Horse tvillinger er en gammel indoeuropæisk tradition, at jeg ønsker at bringe levende ind i vores verden igen. "

Alle / Du / I, et digt

Kategori: Digte
Social Del Tællere

af Dave Klaus

Alle / Du / I

ikke giver mig en pitch
ikke fortælle mig en historie
ikke tjener mig luftkasteller

fortælle mig sandheden

de mørke dele
de hårde dele
de dele, som ikke ønsker at blive fortalt de dele, der skjuler fra solen
(Toothy små ting, sultne for blod, sultne efter kærlighed, sultne, sultne ...)

fortælle mig de triste dele, de dele, hvor du er bange, rigtig bange. Fanget i Amber.

fortælle mig dele, når du gav op, bare gav op,
fordi du var træt, og det var for meget

de dele, du ønsker var anderledes

Jeg ønsker at se skyggerne.

Jeg ønsker at se dem, fed og elastisk, truende og gennemskinnelige.

trans / lucent

for bag disse skygger er et lysende lys
og selvom jeg ikke kan se lige på det (som solen, du kender)

Jeg kender dig

og jeg føler Lyset skinner igennem

Jeg føler, at det der, og det varmer mig, og jeg er sikker,
og det tilføjer til mit lys:

med dit lys mine skygger

Fade,

en smule,

flimrende,

eftertænksom.

Jeg ønsker at se skyggerne, fordi inde i dem jeg ser resten af ​​jer,

inde i dem, jeg ser jer alle.

inde i dem

I / Alle / dig.

Jeg har ingen exit-strategi, ingen plan for døren, ingen flugtvej i tankerne

Jeg er her. Med dig.

Jeg har ingen grund til at betvivle,
nogen rimelig tvivl
(Godt et par, måske, et par, mere end det, ok ja, fik jeg i tvivl)

Men der er ingen tvivl om I / du kan holde, hvad jeg / du fik,

fordi jeg / du er stor, og jeg / du indeholder massevis

I / du

Jeg har en vilje til at suspendere vantro, vilje til be-lieve

Jeg har en tro på, at slidbaner vand over 50.000 Favne,

hovedet over det meste

men ikke altid, nogle gange under

vil vi træde sammen, og jeg vil børste våde hår fra dine øjne.

Og når dens tid jeg vil tørre din pande,
og jeg vil sidde med dig,

bare sidde,

og holde din hånd,

I / dig.

kun så mange vejrtrækninger.

kun så mange.

så du skal ikke give mig en pitch.
og ikke fortælle mig en historie.
og ikke tjener mig luftkasteller.

Jeg ønsker jer alle.

I / Alle / du

Alle

163511_10151535429977350_1023836638_n

Dave Klaus afsluttede New Warrior Training Adventure i juni 2010 i NorCal Center og tingene har fået bedre og bedre for ham lige siden. Han er en ledende tilsynsførende i Alameda County Public Defenders Office hvor over de seneste 17 år har han repræsenteret tusindvis af kunder i sager spænder fra smålige tyveri til særlige omstændigheder mord. Han er gift og har to awesome børn. I sin fritid, han fører et stort Burning Man camp ( www.bEEcHARGE.com ), og starter en kunst kollektiv. Dette er hans første afsluttet digt.

Healing fra sår

Kategori: Digte
Social Del Tællere

af Michael Kullik

Healing fra sår

Wounded Barn

Gråd i Corner

Tabt mellem årene

Græder ud Stille
Ingen kommer
Ingen hører

Et fængsel of Silence
Omgiver mig,
Ind i en tidlig grav.

Hvordan starter jeg
at ånde igen?
Er jeg Nogen slave?

En såret Child
vokser, ligesom
En såret mand.

Såret Bliver mit sværd.
Ligesom hærdet stål
Jeg er stærk igen, Oh min Herre.

En såret mand Sat
Gråd Lost
Inden hans år.

Stilhed omsider blev brudt
Shattered Sår Drejede
I en flod af tårer.

Et sværd af Anger Broke mig ud,
Da jeg råbte
Skreg og brølede.

Kriminalforsorgen ikke var
Mine i Seneste
Det var jeres.

Michael Kullik er en lærer, professor, sanger og digter. Han blev første gang udgivet i 2000 i en bog redigeret af Jill Kuhn kaldet "In Cabin Six". Han har kørt skrivning og trommespil workshops og retreats for mandlige overlevende fra abuse.He har også meldt sin tid kører en gruppe overlevende fra 1999 til 2004.

Dallas Chief Eagle - Lakota på menneskeheden Project

Social Del Tællere

"MKP har vist sig at være vores mest effektive allierede i udrydde folkemord siden Cheyenne var til Lakota 150 år siden." ~ Dallas Chief Eagle

Dallas Chief Eagle

Dallas Chief Eagle

Brothers,

Dallas Chief Eagle velsignede os på Gathering i sidste uge.

Han erklærede, at efter 100 år med ingen allierede, Lakota nu allierede.

Vi, mænd af (Central Plains) menneskeheden Project, er de allierede.

Da han delte det med cirklen, jeg følte det som om taget split åbne, en stråle af lys fyldte rummet, og hjerter blev åbnet bredt. Et skift i universet opstod.

Efter et århundrede med ingen allierede, nu er der allierede.

Jeg vil opfordre hver enkelt af os til at kigge ind i Dallas 'dyb indsigt. Hvad betyder dette ord, allierede, betyde for dig?
Hvem er dine allierede? Hvilke alliancer har du / vi skal gøre?

Hvordan kan vores verdener flytte, hvis vi så verden på denne måde - en verden af ​​potentielle allierede og alliancer?

Jeg ved, at jeg vil aldrig blive den samme.

Taknemmelighed til Dallas for at tale sin sandhed.

Taknemmelighed til Steve Ramm til at kalde denne Indsamling af Central Plains, så vi kan forbinde i fælles sag gennem kraften af ​​cirklen.

Kontrol ydmyg og dybt beæret over at være en del af dette storslåede samfund af mænd,

Dan Pecaut

Medlem af menneskeheden Project

Redaktionel note:

Der er et voksende fællesskab af New Warrior Lakota mænd på Pine Ridge Reservation, som nu holder den hensigt at bringe NWTA til Pine Ridge. MKP Colorado, MKP Central Plains, og menneskeheden Project USA gennem MKP USA Diversity Scholarship Fund har ydet finansiel og logistisk støtte til at hjælpe Lakota mænd deltage i NWTA.

For mere information om den rolle af mænds samfund på reservationen, se denne historie: Native Sun News: Mændenes Oyate - At gå fra smerte til heling

Mission: Bare sige ja.

Social Del Tællere

af Stephen Simmer

En MIT lingvistik professor var belære sin klasse. "På engelsk," sagde han, "en dobbelt negativ danner en positiv. Men i nogle sprog som russisk, en dobbelt negativ fortsat en negativ. Men der er ikke en eneste sprog, ikke én, hvor en dobbelt positiv kan udtrykke en negativ. "En stemme fra bagsiden af rummet pipes op," Yeah, right. "

Jeg bruger en god del af mit liv befæstet bag en mur af pos, stikker ud fra min sjæl som fjerposer fra et hulepindsvin. Selv hvis jeg ikke taler dem, kan folk fornemme NOS strittende fra mig, når jeg går ind i et rum. Nej, jeg har for travlt. Nej, jeg kan ikke se en klar fordel for det. Nej, betyder det ikke line op præcis nok med mine værdier. Nej, jeg ønsker ikke at få alt for forarmet. Nej, jeg er ikke den rette mand til det. Nej, ville han nok bruge dollaren til at købe crack. Nej, jeg ville nok fuck det op, hvis jeg prøvede det. Nej, hvis jeg hjælper hun vil kun have mere.

Da jeg går ned ad gaden, kører handske af alle dem, der repræsenterer behovene i verden, kan jeg mærke, at disse fjerposer har to punkter. One afdelinger Others Off, forsvarer mig mod risikoen for Ja. Det andet punkt presser ind i min sjæl, stramning mig, ardannelse mig, shriveling mig. Jeg kan bruge mine børn og familie som min undskyldning-æ redde mit liv energi til dem i min umiddelbare omgangskreds, dem, jeg elsker. Men min smertefulde sandhed er, mine fjerposer af No stritter i hjemmet, også. Nej, jeg kan ikke gøre spillet. Nej, du kan ikke holde op sent. Nej, jeg kan ikke elske dig den måde, du ønsker at blive elsket. Nej, jeg kan ikke være fuldt til stede for dig.

År siden, Nancy Reagan begyndte hendes berømte bare sige nej-kampagne til narkotika. I denne har jeg overgået-jeg har lært at bare sige nej som standard til næsten alt: forsikringsselskaber sælgere, telemarketers, ja. Men også trængende gade mennesker, mine hunde, ukendte muligheder, mine børn, venner, nye oplevelser, selv min partner Rebecca. Jeg går gennem livet en uudviklede Joakim knuget mit liv-energi parsimoniously, uddele det forsigtigt ud af øre, og derefter beklager, at jeg gav noget væk på alle.

Resultatet er, at jeg lever livet bevæger sig baglæns, min vej bestemmes mere af det, jeg nægter eller undgå, end hvad jeg bekræfte. Jobbet jeg bo i er mere bestemt af de muligheder, jeg har modbevist og tilbagevist end hvad jeg lidenskabeligt har valgt. Samlingen af ​​relationer, jeg ender med, er konsekvensen mere held end valg, som om vi har hver bakket ind i dette hjørne sammen ved et uheld. Jeg amputere muligheder, så rutinemæssigt at jeg ender der, hvor jeg er, i en delvis liv, at jeg ikke har valgt med hensigt.

Jeg taler ikke her om den bevidste, lidenskabelig, kraftfuld Nej, jeg må bruge som et sværd. Denne lidenskabelige Ingen kan være en uundværlig del af en magtfuld Ja-mere om det senere. Her Jeg taler om No-program, der starter op næsten automatisk, når jeg åbner mine øjne om morgenen og kører i baggrunden af ​​mit liv hele dagen. Jeg taler om det Nej, det er den rest af min frygt, skam og utilstrækkelighed, der holder mig lukket til noget nyt, der holder mig fra at forlade hjemmet, der klemmer off mulighed, der holder mig fra Skridtstillingen mod risiko, der isolerer mig fra verden. Jeg taler om det Nej, der-i navnet på sikkerheden-er den tavse dræber, der stopper mig i at leve og elske lidenskabeligt.

Et ja-program er ikke svaret. Efter min mening kan dette være lige så giftige som den refleks nej. Ja, jeg vil gøre jobbet. Ja, jeg vil finansiere-raise for holdet, vil jeg hjælpe dig med at flytte klaveret, vil jeg medformand for udvalget, vil jeg re-spadestik græsplænen, vil jeg hjælpe dig med at flytte marksten. Jeg bliver et ja-mand, hvor er Ja overfladiske, og jeg aldrig rigtig beslutte, hvor at sætte min energi. Derefter får jeg spredt sig så tynd, at jeg ikke følger igennem, viser ikke helt op, eller lad jobbet ufærdige. Eller jeg tager på så meget, at jeg bliver den ledende slædehund, bærer den fulde vægt, herunder vægten af ​​de andre hunde. Jeg stoler ikke på, at andre kan hjælpe, kan undertiden bære mig. Eller jeg placere et væddemål på alle heste i løbet, så jeg aldrig rigtig tabe, men aldrig rigtig vinde. Som et resultat, er der ingen form min karakter-ingen rigtig ved, hvem jeg er, eller hvad jeg vil. Og jeg kan ikke vide, hvem jeg er, eller hvad jeg vil, enten.

Min mission er en kraftfuld sværd, som altid har været begravet i stenen af hvem jeg er.

I Arthur historie, sværdet kommer ud let, med et svirp med håndleddet. Men for nogle, (og jeg regner mig selv blandt disse) udvinding sværd mission er en langsom proces, der kræver en masse af patientens arbejde og opfindsomhed. Nogle af de alkymister tilbragt hele deres liv forsøger at udvinde ædelmetaller fra det mørke stof, ved hjælp af tusindvis af forskellige processer. Men-hurtig eller langsom, hvis jeg kan trække dette sværd ud, mit liv pludselig har en pointe, og jeg bor på forkant.

Danner en mission og leve det betyder at sige ja-bevidst, lidenskabeligt, med engagement. Jeg kender mit formål, og kan stride mod det.

Thich Nhat Hanh siger, at når en oplyst person ser på blomster, vil han også se gennem blomster til skrald, at blomsterne bliver. Og når han ser på skrald, ser han gennem skrald på de blomster, der med tiden vil kunne vokse fra affaldet. Sværdet har 2 kanter. I levende mission, jeg siger en glad og lidenskabelig Ja. Men på samme tid, jeg sige nej på en måde, der definerer mig. Sværdet er pointen med konvergens mellem denne Ja og Nej, og i sidste ende, på mystisk vis, disse to er de samme, så når jeg råber Ja, ekkoet kommer tilbage Nej, og når jeg råber Nej, ekkoet er en umiskendelig Ja.

Stephen Simmer

Steve Simmer, for dem af os privilegeret at kende ham, lever sit liv midt i den konstante strøm og temaet for mission. Passende nok, en af ​​hans formelle mission statements er, at han "skaber en verden af ​​frihed ved at tilskynde mænd med mit mod til at gøre alt, hvad de kan være, og for at være alt, hvad de kan gøre." Ved erhverv en psykoterapeut, han arbejder løbende på at inspirere mænd til aktivt at finde og engagere sig i deres egen mission i denne verden. Dr. Simmer afsluttede New Warrior Training Adventure tilbage i 2001, og har aldrig været den samme mand siden.
Hvis du vil vide mere om Steve og hans arbejde, du kan besøge hans hjemmeside

Mænd: Indefra

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Gæst indlæg: af Garry Gilfoy

Jeg blev for nylig bedt om at levere faglig udvikling til nogle terapeuter om emnet af 'mænds problemer.' Jeg forlod min søns fodboldspil at gøre det og fundet en forsamling af omkring 60 mennesker. De ti eller deromkring mænd deltog sad på periferien af ​​rummet.

Jeg varmede op ved at læse et digt kaldet Rain fra Nowhere af Murray Hartin. Den fortæller om en mand med en ung familie. Vi fanger ham på den dag, han har til hensigt at afslutte sit liv. Efter flere år med tørke, kan han ikke se nogen måde at holde på familiens gård. Samme dag modtager han et brev fra sin far fortæller ham om de hårde tider, han havde haft på gården, og hvor vigtigt det var at hænge i der for hans kone og børn. Alt vil være i orden, forsikrer hans far. Det er en hjerteskærende digt. Jeg kan ikke læse det uden tårer rullende ned mit ansigt. Hele Værelset græd med mig. Når jeg komponeret mig selv igen, jeg spurgte, hvad det drejede sig om digtet, der flyttede dem. Det var forudsigeligt, far-søn forhold.

Jeg spurgte alle til kort overveje nogle ord, de ville bruge til at beskrive Gud. Så at overveje det samme spørgsmål om deres fædre.

Før jeg kunne gå på, en lys gnist talte op til at sige de deskriptorer for Gud og deres far var de samme. Andre gentog deres aftale. Et par chirpy kvinder tæt på fronten sagde nogle dejlige ord som "ubetinget kærlighed", "accept" og "støttende" Jeg takkede disse kvinder, løftede mine øjne til horisonten og sagde "mænd" Out det hældes - ".? Fjernt , vred, ikke-eksisterende, fordømmende. "Kontrasten var skarp.

Jeg havde været bedt om at tale til denne gruppe dels fordi jeg træner terapeuter selv, men også fordi jeg medvært regelmæssige mænds weekender. De er stærke begivenheder - ingen sprut eller stoffer, ingen eksperter taler ned til folk, ingen teoretisering, ingen behandling og ingen taler over mennesker. Vi taler åbent og ærligt om vores egne livserfaringer. Vi byder velkommen til tavshed. Tårer og latter er rigelig. Inden for få timer, knus er hverdagskost. Ved udgangen af ​​weekenden vi gøre en bekræftelse ceremoni, hver enkelt af os at sige lige, hvad det er, vi sætter pris på om de andre. Det er det sværeste af alt - at blive anerkendt for det, vi bringer til andre.

Når disse begivenheder begyndte, troede vi, det var vores pligt at skabe temaer til at guide weekender. Vi behøver ikke har gidet. Uanset hvad vi troede kunne være nyttige - relationer, vores arbejdsliv, skiftende roller - igen og igen emnet tilbage til far-søn-forhold.

Og der var noget, jeg har bemærket gennem årene gennemgang denne uudtømmelig brønd sorg. Gang på gang blev jeg dybt berørt af de følelser af disse modige mænd, der ville snakke og græde foran folk, de ofte ikke havde mødt før. Min egen far, lange døde, blev følelsesmæssigt fritliggende i bedste fald. Men han var ikke voldelig, ikke uansvarligt, ikke en alkoholiker eller følelsesmæssigt misbrug. De mange samtaler om fædre ikke var sandt for mig, men de fandt en meget dyb resonans inden i mig. Jeg begyndte at erkende dette som, hvordan vi oplever arketyper. Disse historier går dybere end vores personlige forhold til vores far i dette liv.

There is a very profound father-son archetype that lies at the root of our relationship to our own God, or higher self, or whatever you deem to be the part of us that needs desperately to shine but so often cannot. Rather than the popular Jungian struggle for dominance between father and son, I'd suggest the higher archetype can be found in the Biblical phrase, “This is my Beloved Son in whom I am well pleased.” It's about recognition and acceptance. And the damage or neglect that came from our own fathers is reflected strongly in this relationship with our higher self. We know deeply that this is not how it's supposed to be. At some level we experience that great being of light at the core of our own self, and long for its expression in our lives. When we struggle, we do so against the backdrop of unconditional love that we sense awaits us, yet is never quite attainable.

By the end of my talk I felt I had to affirm the many female therapists in the room. They struggle with their male clients, and many with the men in their private lives. I could only applaud them for caring so much and continuing to try. They know men are worth it, whether they see much evidence of this or not. Women are very often the first port of call for men who finally muster the courage to ask for help. Yet, in the end, I think that men need to make meaningful contact with other men. It's only here that we can redeem our Gods and our demons.

Garry Gilfoy was raised in Canada and lives in South Australia. His formal education includes Theology, Education, Social Science (Counseling) and is currently a PhD candidate. Garry trains counselor's, is author of The BIG Picture: Insights from the Spiritual World, contributes to The Huffington Post and co-hosts regular men's weekends. His website is http://www.garrygilfoy.com .

New Warrior Training Adventure: My first staffing

Category: Men and Initiation
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by Gonzalo Salinas

A few weeks ago, I had the chance to participate as staff for the first time on the New Warrior Training Adventure.

I had completed my own weekend in Central Florida in April 2013. I remember the feelings in my heart right before it started. Fear, excitement, anger, happiness, more … every moment was a discovery and I remember going through every emotion I've ever felt in my life.

I had similar feelings on my first staffing. The staff arrives one day before the participants, to prepare the site, get staffing directions, and for a first-time staffer like me, to see the “behind the scenes” of the Weekend. I witnessed the huge amount of work that close to 40 other men were putting in as volunteers to help the men who would be arriving on Friday (often called initiates) have a flawless experience: Men of Service, Elders, the Certified Leader Team, the Lodge team, in general every member from the staff adding his gifts to accomplish the main goal: to offer a group of men what could be one of the most powerful weekends of their lives.

This time I was the one on the other side of the wall. On my weekend I was discovering and living my experience, but this time I was more concerned for every man in front of me going trough their process. Something that I couldn't avoid, almost immediately I began to care profoundly for every man going through the weekend.

lover magician warrior king Talking with one of the elders about why I was feeling my staffing experience in a more heartfelt way than my own initiation, he said to me with a big smile:

“Now you have the privilege of being in service to your brothers.”

One by one, I saw men breaking through. Understanding the importance of accountability in their lives, seeing how every action, no matter how small, has an impact on our families, on our society, and on the world. Seeing how they had set themselves up, and seeing the way through to a new way of being as a man.

At the end of the weekend, driving back to South Florida, with fresh memories of the men going through their process, a thought hit me, and I fully realized what happened on the weekend:

“The cycle has been fully completed,” I thought, “some other men voluntarily did the same thing for me on my weekend, and now I'm doing the same, so other men can realize they are complete, whole men, great men, strong and loving men that can exercise power and compassion, love and accountability in every act. Now they know what I only learned less than a year ago.”

The words of the writer Sam Keen were resonating in my heart:

“A man must go on a quest
to discover the sacred fire
in the sanctuary of his own belly,
to ignite the flame in his heart
to fuel the blaze in the hearth
to rekindle his ardor for the earth”

After arriving in Fort Lauderdale, I went to my girlfriend's house,

“How was your weekend?” she said, excited to see me, giving me the most tender hug.

I hugged her dearly (a long and a very strong hug), and the words came from my heart:

“My love, the cycle has been fully completed.”

She smiled and continued hugging me. Now I can return to the “real world” satisfied that I've witnessed many miracles on the weekend.

Gonzalo foto

Gonzalo Salinas is the MKP Journal assistant Editor for the ManKind Project USA, a nonprofit mentoring and training organization that offers powerful opportunities for men's personal growth at any stage of life. Salinas studied Literature in Lima, Peru at San Marcos University, and has been living in the United States since 2003. He lives in Miami, FL, and is committed to his development with the organization and the dissemination of the message of the Mankind Project.

Man Up – Jonathan Martin, Richie Incognito and the measure of a “Warrior”

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ruffian Are you strong?

How do you measure your strength?

What does the idea of Warrior Culture mean to you?

What about within the context of American Football? In my time, I have stood with men I consider Warriors. Men I have met through the Mankind Project and outside of it. Men I consider strong for their trust in me and the people around them, and their ability to stand in vulnerability and be a mirror for my own choices. I love this article for how it speaks to the complexity of what it means to be a man, and a warrior, in today's society.

I found “ Man Up – Declaring a war on warrior culture in the wake of the Miami Dolphins bullying scandal ” via Patton Oswalt's sharing of this article by Brian Phillips with his fans on Facebook. Share what you think in the comments.

http://www.grantland.com/story/_/id/9939308/richie-incognito-jonathan-martin-miami-dolphins-bullying-scandal

Alex Bender was initiated in Santa Barbara, CA in September 2007. He currently lives outside St. Paul, MN with his wife and their menagerie of cats and greyhounds. He sits on the local MKP Board as Vice President and works for growth in personal mission and community leadership.

Turning Weapons into Instruments

Category: Multicultural , Opinion
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Editors note: by Gonzalo Salinas

“I believe that the purpose of Art is to come up with ways to transform the most negative instincts, into creative instincts.” ~ Pedro Reyes, a Mexican artist who came up with the idea of transforming guns into musical instruments in a powerful project called “Disarm”.

In a previous installation, “Shovels for Guns,” the people in Culiacan, a violent city in Mexico, donated weapons and after melting them they created more than 1500 shovels used to reforest the city.

The project you'll see on the video is breathtaking. Faith in Humanity: Restored.

Gonzalo foto

Gonzalo Salinas is an Assistant Editor for the ManKind Project Journal, a publication of the ManKind Project, a nonprofit mentoring and training organization offering powerful opportunities for men's personal growth at any stage of life. Salinas studied Literature in Lima, Peru at San Marcos University, and has been living in the United States since 2003. He lives in Miami, FL. Salinas is committed to his own personal development, and to spreading the word about the vision and mission of the Mankind Project .

Creating Candor: blog post by Alain Hunkins

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Editor's Note: by Gonzalo Salinas
The Oxford Dictionary defines the word candor like this:

candor

Syllabification: (can·dor)
Pronunciation: /ˈkandər, -ˌdôr/
noun : The quality of being open and honest in expression; frankness:

a man of refreshing candor

I just found another way to explain that word: In this family story, simple and tender, Alain Hunkins brings a new meaning to that word and how to apply it on our daily lives. I hope it brings a smile.

If I speak up candidly, it'll be a career limiting move.

I can't tell you the number of times I've heard this phrase in organizations.

On the surface, it seems ridiculous. How could honesty sabotage your career?

But this belief doesn't come out of the blue. It comes from experience.

If you spoke up in the past and got dinged for it, you won't do it again.

So you don't speak up.

Don't rock the boat.

How often have you heard that phrase at work? As if the “waters” to navigate today's hyper-changing economy were calm.

Psychologist, Paul Ekman, author of Why Kids Lie reports that the #1 reason that children (of every age) lie is to avoid punishment.

Adult employees aren't much different. If you're afraid of punishment on the job, you're more likely to lie, or at the very least, withhold the truth.

And when you withhold information in a knowledge worker industry, you sabotage success. Hvordan? By supporting a low trust, status quo seeking culture.

So what can you do as a leader to create a culture that supports open, honest dialogue?

Click on the following link to read the rest:

Creating Candor; Pioneer Leadership Blog

Alain Hunkins leads personal and professional development trainings for individuals, teams and organizations. Over the last two decades, Alain has facilitated for over a thousand groups, ranging from at-risk youth to Fortune 500 executives. He moves between the educational, artistic, not-for-profit, government and corporate worlds. Alain sharpened his facilitation skills as an Educational Consultant in New York City, developing programs on many subjects, including Conflict Resolution, Networking, Customer Service, Communication, and Leadership.

Alain earned a Bachelor of Arts degree from Amherst College and his Masters of Fine Arts from the University of Wisconsin/Milwaukee Professional Theater Training Program. He is a certified Leadership Challenge & MBTI facilitator, as well as a certified co-leader for ManKind Project International, whose mission is to help men lead missions of service in their families, communities, and workplaces. Alain completed the New Warrior Training Adventure in 1995.

I'm a weak man.

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by Brooks H.

I'm a weak man.

I'm not strong enough to live up to this _warrior_ shit
24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year, 160 years a life.

lord knows I try.

Just can't do it all the time.

Sometimes I just want to run away and hide.

Curl up into a little ball and tell the world to fuck off.

Scream 'NO' into the face of any asshole that wants me to do ONE MORE FUCKING THING!

help in ONE MORE FUCKING WAY. No way, FUCK OFF!

and I feel bad about it.

feel guilty that I'm not strong enough.

feel guilty at the mistakes I make being irresponsible, self-indulgent, un-conscious, un-truthful, withholding,

un-feeling.

and then, when it gets too big,

I realize that I _am_ feeling …

feeling sad.

and as I let myself feel that, I begin to think about my I-Group,
and what they would say if I brought this into a circle.

I imagine the number of raised hands of men I know that have fallen in these same ways

I can feel the smile starting on my face as I begin to feel again, what it means to be human, and fallible,

and supported.

and know that this is all it takes to keep going on,

to keep watching my behavior, and changing some habits,

to keep getting better.

...

and I take a breath.

and another,

and the smile begins to warm the cold places and I am grateful.

and into that gratitude comes the feeling of being blessed by this community.

Some warriors do get bloody. Their brothers help them up.

Thank you men for being in my life,

It's time to get on with my day.

peace and blessings,

Brooks

Brooks H. completed the New Warrior Training Adventure in June of 1999, at Clara Barton Camp in Central Massachusetts. He is a member of Men On The Loose I-Group, a ManKind Project Men's Group meeting outside Boston on a weekly basis. He lives in Arlington, MA.

Wisdom Bought and Sold – 25¢

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by Craig 'Snake' Bloomstrand

A Day at the Park

A Day at the Park

I've been writing about Wisdom recently and decided to do some field research.

I made two cardboard signs -

Wisdom
Bought and Sold
25¢

My friend Alan and I drove to the lake intending to buy or sell wisdom for a quarter a dose. We headed for a bench next to the walking path, strategically placed our signs for best visibility and got right to work.

Two young women stopped before we'd even settled. One held a 14 month old baby and the other obviously a soon to be mom.

“You're selling wisdom?” One asked. “What a great idea.”

“Well actually we're buying and selling wisdom.” I responded.

“I'll take some,” the expectant mother said, “How does it work?”
She rummaged through her purse looking for a quarter.

“First we have to agree on a definition,” I explained, “Then we can decide what type of wisdom you'd like to purchase.

“Ok,” she agreed, what is the definition?

I've been studying various published definitions and concocted my own hybrid from what I've read.

Wisdom is the ability to learn from life experience and use it to shape the future for the good of all.

I shared my definition along with my unexpected discovery that the difference between knowledge and wisdom seems to be embedded in the last few words.
“For the good of all.”

The two women accepted my definition commenting they never thought about the difference and agreed for the good of all did indeed fit. “Why are you doing this?” they asked.

“We believe the world could use a little more wisdom. We decided offering a clear definition and assigning a dollar (Quarter) value, we'd encourage people to value wisdom and use it consciously in their daily lives.” I explained.

“Why here at the lake?” the woman holding the baby asked, “Shouldn't you be in Washington selling wisdom?” I laughed replying, “this is our first day out. We thought it would be wise to start at the grassroots before stepping onto the national stage. We figured only very wise people would be walking around the lake on a sunny Tuesday afternoon.

The expectant mother suddenly piped up, “I have some wisdom.”

“Great,” I encouraged, “Lets have it.”

“Never be too quick to judge other people,” she offered adding, “I'm quick to judge people based on what they wear or how they look. My husband is much better at withholding his judgments until he gets to know people better. He's a more reliable judge of people than I am.”

“Never be too quick to judge other people,” she repeated.

“It fits the definition,” I acknowledged, “Something you learned that could shape the future and certainly for the good of all.”

She seemed very pleased with herself and refused the quarter I offered saying, “No, I'd rather trade, now you give me some wisdom.”

“What flavor of wisdom?” I asked. She paused for a moment considering my question. I noticed her hand slowly caressing her pregnant belly.

“How about children? She asked, do you have any wisdom about raising children?

I raised two children who are now about the same age as these young women. When it comes to childrearing I'm no master but I am experienced and I have learned a lot through the years. I offered up the first thing that came into my mind.

“You can never love a child too much. Spend as much time as you can simply loving your child, you and your child will be forever grateful.”

We agreed we'd made a good trade of wisdom, said our goodbyes and the young mothers continued on their walk. I watched as they walked away, two women filled with the special beauty motherhood bestows.

We did encounter the skeptics, cynics, and the joggers determined to complete one more mile and far too driven to stop and take a moment. I'm grateful for those who did stop. Although no money changed hands today we did go home with our pockets full of wisdom. I imagine we sparked lively dinner conversations last night. I hope so. People have collected a lot of wisdom yet are often shy or hesitant about expressing it. We will continue to hit the streets with our signs. Look for us and stay tuned.

- Snake

EDITOR'S NOTE: Follow the ' Wisdom – 25¢ ' Adventure on their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Wisdom-25/207834646061043

Snake

Craig “Snake” Bloomstrand is a Certified Leader in the ManKind Project, and a self-described 'Social Adventurer.' He is a founding member of the Minnesota MKP Community.

A Long Lost Letter From Your Innate Creative Self

Category: Men and Mission , Opinion
Social Del Tællere

By Gonzalo Salinas

iStock_000001635209Small

Time to wake up?

On www.highexistence.com , I found this article about creativity written by Stephanie Kaitlyn Torres, aka Satori, a great blogger, traveler, and photographer. I think it's amazing.

How many times have I put aside my creative self just to fit into the social conventions? How long has my creative self been sleeping? On this “Letter from your Creative Self,” I hope you find what I found, a very interesting voice, speaking some truth. Click on the link below to read the article:

A Long Lost Letter From Your Innate Creative Self

Enjoy, and don't forget to comment.

Gonzalo foto

Gonzalo Salinas is the MKP Journal assistant Editor for the ManKind Project USA, a nonprofit mentoring and training organization that offers powerful opportunities for men's personal growth at any stage of life. Salinas studied Literature in Lima, Peru at San Marcos University, and has been living in the United States since 2003. He lives in Miami, FL, and is committed to his development with the organization and the dissemination of the message of the Mankind Project.

Waiting for the Blessing of My Father

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By Gonzalo Salinas

In October it will be ten years since I've seen my father.

I remember clearly the last time I saw him. We were at the National Airport in Lima.

Let me back-track. The flight to Miami was at 8 pm. For international flights, you are supposed to check in three hours in advance or risk missing the flight.

I was at home, waiting for my father to say goodbye at 6 pm. Still a fifteen minute drive away from the airport. I was late and pissed off. It was the same story. Waiting for my father. Putting all my expectations as a kid on that man. The architect. The eloquent speaker. The storyteller. Great talk but limited results. And yet I still never lost hope of seeing him awaken.

Twenty three years of my life waiting. Waiting for him to stand up and take action; for my brothers Victor and Fernando, for my Sister Mariola and my mother Soledad. And there I was; about to leave Peru, and I was still waiting.

Peter Putnam, a writer and ManKind Project supporter, in his extraordinary book : “The Song of Father-Son: Men in Search of The Blessing,” writes that a man craves the blessing of the Father more than anything else in the world.

“We crave the blessing of our father. Our father whoever he is. Wherever he's been, hugging us close and saying these simple magical words: Son, I'm proud of you . You have all you need to be a strong, loving man.”

Later, Putnam emphasizes that his entire book, and his entire life, are about that hug and those words.

And there it is. My whole life I was always craving the blessing of my father. And to give the blessing, he needed to show up.

In October 2003 I didn't know that what I wanted was my father's blessing. I was feeling the same familiar feelings of disappointment, anger, and frustration that I felt many times towards him. My life in Peru was about to come to an end. I was about to start a new life in a new country where I couldn't speak a word of the language. I was longing for something from him … waiting for him to come and save me.

He arrived at 6:30 pm. I was furious. I wanted to scream at him and blame him for whatever unpleasant things were happening in my life.

He came pretending like nothing was wrong … and I screamed,

“Dad, I had to be at the airport at 5!!!”

He reacted like he usually did; serene, almost as if he wasn't involved.

He said, “I'm sorry.”

I've heard that I'm sorry so many times.

We went to the airport. As soon as we arrived, my brother, who was waiting there, told me that the flight was delayed two hours …

Four other friends were at the airport to say goodbye. A friend of mine brought me chocolates made by his mom, another friend asked me if I had some soles (the Peruvian currency) “You won't need it in the US” he said. Despite my anger, I gave him like thirty bucks in Peruvian soles.

Everyone was pretending that this was another get together, the usual frivolous conversation; girls, soccer, cars.

I was begging deep inside for my father to call me aside … to say something meaningful.

Boarding begins. I start saying goodbye to my friends and family. At the time I thought I was leaving for only two or three years. It's now ten years without seeing my father. I saved the last goodbye for Him, (Him with capital H). It was very simple goodbye. A brief hug and a kiss on my forehead.

“Behave,” he said.

Throughout the years I have carried a lot of resentment towards my father. I blamed him for many things. I've always thought about how he could do better on this or that area. It's been ten years. Now, after my New Warrior Training Adventure, and ongoing work in my men's I-group, I notice that I didn't have to look at my father, but at myself.

Looking back, I see that he did the best he could with what he had, from where he was. If he didn't do better, it was simply because he didn't know any better. Maybe he was also craving the blessing of his father. Men's work, for me, has included learning to forgive. Forgiveness for my father. Forgiveness for myself. I didn't know what I needed, and I didn't know how to ask for it. He didn't know how to give what I could never ask for, the blessing of a Father.

Only after I forgave, I accomplished something that I thought it was impossible: I have learned to love my father. Just saying it give me a sense of freedom: I love my Father. Yes, I love Him and I can't wait to see him again. To look into his eyes and hug him. Not only as the man who gave me life, but as my brother warrior that he is, doing the best he can with what he is given.

Gonzalo foto

Gonzalo Salinas is the MKP Journal assistant Editor for the ManKind Project USA, a nonprofit mentoring and training organization that offers powerful opportunities for men's personal growth at any stage of life. Salinas studied Literature in Lima, Peru at San Marcos University, and has been living in the United States since 2003. He lives in Miami, FL, and is committed to his development with the organization and the dissemination of the message of the Mankind Project.

True Voice Process – A Conversation with Alan Little

Social Del Tællere

af Boysen Hodgson

Alan Little

Alan Little

As has been said … necessity is often the mother of invention. Alan Little thought he had it all worked out, and then it all started crumbling. In some new ways, it still is. But the slippery slope from 'I've got this all figured out,' to 'What the heck is going on!?' happens in different ways for different folks. In Alan's case, it helped him arrive at a moment of clarity that gave rise to the 'True Voice System.'

I spoke with Alan in August about his system, and took a few hours to walk through the True Voice Process work-book. I'm glad I did. In a few hours I added new language and some new tools to my personal growth tool-box, and came away with more clarity about what I value deeply and what I won't tolerate in my life.

Alan completed the New Warrior Training Adventure in 2007.

Check out the interview, and if you would like to learn more about the “True Voice System,” check out Alan's web site .
2013-09-27_TrueVoice Interview

Boysen Hodgson

Boysen Hodgson is the Communications and Marketing Director for the ManKind Project USA, a nonprofit mentoring and training organization that offers powerful opportunities for men's personal growth at any stage of life. Boysen received his BA with Honors from the University of Massachusetts at Amherst, after completing 2 years of Design coursework at Cornell University. Han har været at hjælpe virksomheder og enkeltpersoner designe forandring, de ønsker at se i verden i 15 år. He's a dedicated husband.

Rolling in the Tides of Ash

Category: Poetry
Social Del Tællere
by Ryan Keaton

Rolling in the Tides of Ash

A speck of gold
In a sea of shadows
Rolling in the tides of ash
It's getting late and I am tired

I step outside myself
Only for a moment
And in that moment
I am free

Free to laugh
To smile
Free to cry
Or breathe deeply
Free to be myself
And it doesn't hurt

And suddenly a whisper
A doubtful wind
Sweeps across my eyes
I fall to the ground
Knees to the Earth

There is a light that glows
Buried deep beneath
Memories of salted tears
And broken glass
There is a light that glows
It is small but I can see it

It is familiar
It has a face; a name
It has wants and needs
Hopes and dreams
A voice that wants to speak
And a longing to be free

And suddenly
I am afraid -
I am afraid of me

A speck of gold
In a sea of shadows
Rolling in the tides of ash

Original writing by Ryan Keaton, a ManKind Project member in the greater Washington DC Community.

Sublime and the Drugs

Social Del Tællere

By Gonzalo Salinas

On May 25 th 1996, Bud Gaugh, drummer for the Californian band Sublime, reported to the police that his friend Brad, leader of the band, had disappeared. After trying to call him ten times he stopped because it kept going directly to voicemail. Nobody had any information.

It had been a wild night: they played at a festival in San Francisco and after searching without any results, Bud returned to the hotel where the band had stayed the previous night. The manager opened the room that was supposedly empty and both found a somber scene: Bradley James Nowell was kneeling on the floor with half his body on the bed. On the bed was a puddle of vomit and Bud thought that after the concert Brad had gotten drunk and passed out before even being able to get in bed.

When they moved him, a more serious picture emerged. Next to him were needles, a lighter, and a small bag with white powder. Bud brought his face to Nowell's chest, confirming that his heart was not beating. The police statement declared that Bradley James Nowell, 28 years old, died from a heroin overdose that stopped his heart. He could have been saved but nobody was present to help him in that lonely hotel room.

Two months after his death, the album they had been working on for the past year was released. Then came the avalanche of success. For several months, they were ranked first in the Billboard Rock charts, they made the rotation on MTV, won gold and multiplatinum records, and Rolling Stone magazine awarded Sublime's album as the best of 1997 thanks to hits like Santeria and What I Got.

Bradley Nowell left an important legacy, influencing singers like Ben Harper, John Mayer, Jason Mraz, and Jack Johnson. He also left behind an 11-month old orphan, a wife, a band, and a Dalmatian. He never enjoyed his fame or wealth. He made bad decisions and the heroin ultimately stopped his heart. Brad Nowell Brad Nowell was perhaps a reminder to us all of the consequences of these excesses and where they lead us.

Today we live in a world where mind-altering substances – and we're not just talking about drugs – often dictate our choices. It's not 'over there,' and it's not 'them.' Det er os. It's people just like you and me.

It is common for people to live with some sort of addiction, be it hard drugs, soft drugs, or even legal drugs such as alcohol and tobacco. The frenetic rhythm of our society has created other addictions as well, many not yet officially recognized; coffee, video-games, media, pornography.

Today, when debates are held in Uruguay (as well as in numerous state houses across the USA) to decide the legalization of marijuana, people on both sides are writing articles, granting interviews, and opining left and right on a subject that needs to be honestly faced in the entire western hemisphere. If the senate ratifies the law approved by the chamber of legislators, Uruguay will have taken the first step that will serve as an example for Latin America. Not so much to decide whether we are for or against the matter, but as a statement that actions are being taken on a cancer that is having a profound impact on our society. The drug economy, as noted by Moises Naim in his book, “ Illicit: How Smugglers, Traffickers, and Copycats are Hijacking the Global Economy ,” doubled from 1990 to 2002, without calculating the parallel powers it creates, the mafias and the cost that the ensuing crime has on governments.

Being for or against decriminalization, the “war on drugs” is a war that was lost at the beginning, and our action is needed now. Many of us and our fellow beings live in a state where we need a substance to survive and “bear” life. How do we get back to a healthy balance point? Where is the emotional health of our society standing? Do we fill in the gaps in our spirit with addictive substances or compulsive behaviors to forget reality?

Many of us, in our daily activities, are using alternatives that bring us closer to sanity or the elevation of the spirit; yoga, exercise, meditation, 'clean' food, and appropriate amounts of rest that balance out the frenetic pace that our work requires. But this is far from the norm in our culture. We have arrived at an alarming moment.

Maybe it is time to consider that everyone has a personal responsibility in creating a healthy society. It begins with our own emotional sanity that will lead to a collective sanity. We can search for that sanity together, or we can keep running. And it will continue to cost us. When some substance or addiction that allows us to carry on with our lives slams into reality, when we have our own personal version of Bradley James Nowell's story in our families.

Click here to watch the video Santeria by Sublime

Gonzalo foto

Gonzalo Salinas is the MKP Journal assistant Editor for the ManKind Project USA, a nonprofit mentoring and training organization that offers powerful opportunities for men's personal growth at any stage of life. Salinas studied Literature in Lima, Peru at San Marcos University, and has been living in the United States since 2003. He lives in Miami, FL, and is committed to his development with the organization and the dissemination of the message of the Mankind Project.

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