Gæst Indlæg: en velsignelse og en udfordring for det nye år

Genudgives med tilladelse fra Masculinity-Movies.com af Eivind Figenschau Skjellum

(Videohilsen nederst)

201 Earth 4 har været et år med enorm forandring og vækst for mig og de fleste af de mennesker, jeg kender og kærlighed.

Hvis du er en person, der er i ærlig samtale med dit liv, jeg vil vædde på du har haft den samme oplevelse. Vi er på mange måder i over vores hoveder, med liv fuld af aktivitet. Og mens "aktivitet" bruges til at betyde, at vi gør en masse forskellige ting i den ydre tid-rum dimension, denne hurtighed er for længst infiltreret vores indre verdener så godt.

Konsekvensen er, at vi ser ud til at omdanne, for bedre eller værre, hurtigere end nogensinde før. Folk synes at være "popping" over det hele. Faktisk, vågner op fra trance af konventionelle liv synes ikke længere forbeholdt kun hardcore mediterende.

Vi er blevet fodret op med den "gamle verden", har vi ikke? Denne stramme-assed, hyper-rationelle, forbrugerbevægelsen, destruktiv, deprimeret verden synes at gradvist at miste sit greb om menneskeheden, og mens dens bevidsthed aldrig bør fjernes ( det er en del af spiralen evolutionens, at vi alle skal krydse), det ser ud til at miste sin status som top hund.

Dette er gode nyheder!

Den dårlige nyhed er, at på vej ned, synes det helt parat til at tage hele økosystem med det. Man skulle tro, at problemet er "derude", men denne proces i retning af økologiske sammenbrud er drevet af normale folk som du og jeg, der er simpelthen for travlt, udfordret eller deprimeret at gå på udkig efter svar på deres problemer i deres indre verdener. Så i stedet, holde de køber lort, de ikke har brug for, forurenende både deres indre liv og planeten i processen. Vi er nok den mest afhængige mennesker, verden nogensinde har kendt.

Denne planet har alt hvad vi behøver for at trives. Og hvis vi skulle benytte lejligheden til at vende sig mod livet for tilregnelighed, vores fremtid ser lys ud faktisk. Men for at det kan ske, skal vi på en måde, die.

Svigtende identitet strukturer i en foranderlig verden

"Verden er ændret. Jeg føler det i vandet, jeg føler det i jorden, jeg lugte det i luften ". Således åbner i starten af ​​den udvidede udgave af Lord of the Rings episke. For dem, der har gjort dybt indre arbejde og åbnede døren til mystik i deres liv, Galadriel ord ring sandt i disse dage. Den anden dag, jeg kunne føle det som en "elektrisk ladning", og en overjordisk, gravid stilhed i luften. En ven beskrev det som "den stille før stormen".

Det ser ud til, at disse ændringer i den kollektive sjæl menneskeheden og den åndelige luft, vi indånder forårsager et stort antal mennesker til at stå ansigt til ansigt med deres falske identitetspapirer strukturer. Jeg gik gennem denne proces i 2014 og mange af mine venner enten gik igennem det eller er i den nu. Vi blev så allergisk over for os selv (et begreb digter David Whyte taler om smukt), at vi blev tvunget til at droppe vores vedhæftede filer til vores gamle verdens identitet strukturer og falde i den alkymistiske smeltedigel underverden indvielse.

Og i denne opgivelsen af ​​gamle verden levn fra vores indre geografiske synes landskaber af forbundethed og mystik til at åbne op. Dette er ikke woo-woo. Sådanne fænomener studeret på værdsatte institutioner læring som Harvard og MIT (tjek forskning af Robert Kegan eller Susann Kog-Greuter for mere information).

Ikke alene er seriøse udøvere rammer deres Nekyia rejser, på vej til deres fuldt inkarneret suverænitet, er "normale mennesker" ved at vågne op så godt. Jeg har lavet mit eget bidrag til denne proces, især med min indre Throne arbejde, og mange, jeg er glad for at sige, har været vågne op gennem materiale, jeg har tilbudt. (Jeg naturligvis ikke taler om oplysning her, men for at blive introduceret til nogle grundfjeld sandheder om, hvem vi er, og hvordan vi arbejder.)

Hvad foregår der?

Det synes vi er på et stadium i menneskets historie, hvor kræfter evolution har trykket på den røde "nitro" knappen og hurtigere ud i en slags crescendo. (Husk dem sjove at køre spil fra tilbage i 90'erne?)

Hvor skal vi hen?

Jeg læser om Carl Jungs liv nu, og jeg fascineret og imponeret over niveauet af vejledning han åbnede i sit liv. Han var en virkelig bemærkelsesværdig mand. I 1913 havde han en forudanelse af dårlige tidender i verden, ligesom i Galadriel er voiceover. Og som vi alle ved, Verdenskrig startede året efter.

Dr. Jung var klart en meget intuitiv, tunet i mennesket, og jeg tvivler ikke et sekund, at hans forudanelse var mere end blot en tilfældighed. Så når en bevidst menneske kan sætte sin finger på verdens puls og læse det præcist, hvad skal vi til at tænke, når tusindvis af bevidste mennesker samtidigt føler præcis de samme ting? Hvad skal vi gøre i denne vedvarende kollektiv følelse af, at vi er på vej mod det punkt, "gøre det eller bryde det"? Skal vi vedtage struds strategi og foregive noget sker der?

Eller skal vi stige til opgaven og påtager sig ansvaret for en verden, der svæver periluously tæt på katastrofe?

Armageddon fantasier

Verden er så smuk. Det kan dog være en temmelig skræmmende sted. For den økologiske krise er ikke kun en vores: Store dele af menneskeheden nu puste til deres våde Armageddon fantasier. Millioner af "rigtige troende" er samtidigt, fra hver sin side af kloden, påberåber enden af ​​verden. "udvalgte folk" mytologier som dem i højreorienterede kristne og radikale muslimer fastslå, at den gamle verden skal slutte, før den nye verden vil blive genfødt. Konsekvensen er, at de vil mere eller mindre bevidst, opmuntre enhver udvikling i verden, der fremmer den kommende endetiden. Væsentlige, jo før verden går til lort, jo bedre. I deres sind, ser du, der er sådan en ting som paradis, og det er ikke på jorden, som vi kender det! (Det er hvad der sker, når du eksil i Lover arketype til efterlivet)

Så forstå, at der er mange mennesker, der tror, ​​at verden skulle ende så hurtigt som muligt, og at alt, hvad du gør i tjeneste for at redde det er faktisk en hindring for opfyldelsen af deres valgte folk mytologi. Selvfølgelig kan du ikke kampagne politisk med sådanne ideer, men som stadig ikke forhindre dig i at blive kørt af dem.

Når du forstår, at millioner af mennesker - og en stor procentdel af Fox News-ser amerikanerne og politikere - faktisk bor inden dette paradigme, kan du begynde at få meget bange faktisk.

Og dette er, men starten på de udfordringer, vi står over for!

Ah, menneskeheden! Vi sikker lavet et rod af det denne gang.

At blive vogtere af balance

Hvis du er en af de mange, der har haft et glimt af virkeligheden - der har set den sande ansigt af galskab, der (stadig) regulerer menneskeheden - kan du ikke længere foregive at være okay med konventionel levende. Og jeg tror 2015 er et år, hvor du bliver nødt til at acceptere konsekvenserne af, hvad du har set nærmere end nogensinde før. Dette er en velsignelse og en forbandelse. Det vil give anledning til enorme glæde, selv lyksalighed. Og det vil fylde dig med fortvivlelse.

Så meget er klart for mig: Når du tager den røde pille, kan du ikke fortryde det. Du kan ikke sætte tilbage i illusion, som hvis du ikke havde set sandheden. Det er for tegn på kun film. Som én, der kender, skal du enten påtage lederskab i processen med fødsel den "nye verden", eller du skal lide dybt forsøger at foregive, du kan være lykkelig i den gamle. Den lidelse, du kan opleve i 2015 er ganske enkelt din sjæl måde at fortælle dig, at du er ude af trit med virkeligheden. Stol på det.

Og ved, at der er en bølge af opvågnen vask over hele verden. Dette er ikke nogle banal new-age koncept; Jeg ser tegn på det i mit liv hver dag, som jeg er i den privilegerede position tælle nogle af de mest magtfulde forandringsagenter i verden som venner.

Hvad jeg ønsker for dig, kære læser, er, at du lader dig inspirere af alt dette. Der har aldrig før i hele menneskehedens historie, været en tid, hvor kræfterne i verden er blevet mere perfekt afstemt til personer som dig til at opdage og give deres store arbejde. Dette er en gave til dig. Det sker også at være en moralsk nødvendighed. Dit liv spiller en afgørende rolle i at få os alle sikkert gennem denne udfoldelse menneskelige drama. Hvis du opdager, hvad du er her for at gøre, og derefter gøre det, vi alle vil have en bedre chance for at gøre det igennem.

Og ved at tilslutte til det globale netværk af forandringsagenter, der aktivt tager på disse udfordringer, vil du opdage venskaber modsætning til alle, du nogensinde før har oplevet. I den virkelige verden, der opholder sig i matricen er simpelthen ikke så sjovt som at frakoble fra det.

Her er handlen: Hvis opfyldelse og bemyndiget maskulinitet er, hvad du er ude efter, behøver du ikke rigtig har et valg; du skal engagere sig med kampen om sjælen af menneskeheden så hurtigt som muligt. Alt andet vil være ude af integritet med din dybeste kald og depression og lidelse du føler vil minde dig om det hver dag.

Du kan fortælle i hvilken grad du er på rette spor fra dit niveau af vanedannende adfærd. Hvis du er alvorligt afhængige, men alligevel tænker idealistiske tanker, er du stadig et symptom på sygdommen og ikke kuren. Under gode ideer er ikke nok - du skal engagere sig med livet. Du skal acceptere din skæbne som vogter af den resterende del af verden.

Vores overlevelse er på spil. Vågn op.

Maj 2015 være din bedste år nogensinde

Der er en masse snak i verden af ​​selvudvikling skabe dit perfekte liv. Ja, det er vigtigt at have et godt liv. Jeg vil have det for dig, ligesom jeg vil have, at for mig selv. Men det er en begrænset perspektiv. Tænker, at formålet med din eksistens er blot at skabe et godt liv for dig selv vil skabe et dårligt liv for dig selv. For et godt liv er fundet i at give. At lære at modtage åbenlyst er vigtigere end du måske tror, ​​men at lære at give bæredygtigt er endnu mere så. Faktisk ser det ud til, at dit niveau af lykke er i direkte forhold til det serviceniveau, du tilbyder til andre.

I nogle mærkelig og ironisk måde, dit liv er egentlig ikke om dig. Dette er, hvad jeg vil have dig til at vågne op til i 2015. Du lever for at være fuldt gives væk. Du skal dø en tom beholder eller hvad du dør med IS beklager.

Jeg vil give al min energi til dette globale alkymi i den kommende tid. Og jeg ville være beæret, hvis du lader mig spille en rolle i din opvågnen. Den Reclaim din indre Throne workshops og online træning er stærke måder at trække stikket ud fra illusion og sætte dig på vejen til Suverænitet ( se kalenderen ). Og jeg tilbyder kraftfuld en-til-én coaching for dem, der ønsker at tage det dybere.

Uanset om du vælger at arbejde med mig eller ej, jeg håber inderligt - helt fra bunden af ​​mit hjerte - at det bliver en fantastisk år for dig. Sandelig, har der aldrig blevet et bedre tidspunkt for fantastiske år. Men indsatserne er høje, højere, end de nogensinde har været. Du kan opleve, at du vil nødt til at opgive en masse ting, som du har kært at manifestere denne glædelige liv i tjeneste.

Som for mig og Masculinity-Movies.com, jeg ved ikke med sikkerhed, hvad der vil ske. Min energi vil gå til, hvor det har den største effekt. Jeg elsker at forbinde med dig her på dette site, og hvis der holder skiftende liv, vil jeg holde gør det. Hvad jeg ved ud over en skygge af tvivl, er imidlertid, at du vil finde mig på hårdt arbejde breder Inner Throne arbejde i verden. Og jeg ville elske at se dig i en workshop eller en online uddannelse snart!

En meget Godt Nytår til jer, venner og tilhængere af Masculinity-Movies.com. Kan du stige og stige igen, med hjerte og med vildskab, og bliver, hvem du virkelig er.

Mine bedste ønsker for din bedste år nogensinde,
Eivind Figenschau Skjellum,
Grundlægger af Masculinity-Movies.com
og skaberen af Inner Throne processen

Eivind Skjellum

Eivind Skjellum, er grundlægger af maskulinitet film, hvor det oprindeligt dukkede op i sin blog. Eivind afsluttede New Warrior Training Adventure i juni 2011. Læs om hans erfaring HER. Han er også en myndighed på Robert Moore og Douglas Gillettes system arketyper konge, kriger, tryllekunstner, Lover. Eivind grundlagt Authentic Norge, en gren af USA-baserede Autentisk verden i 2011. Han er også skaberen af Reclaim din indre Throne online træning.

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Symboler Transformation - Talisman

af Randy Marks

Symboler af Transformation

Symboler af Transformation

For ni år siden, jeg blev medlem af menneskeheden Project ( MKP.org ) efter endt New Warrior Training Adventure (NWTA). Projektet ændrer verden ved at hjælpe mænd helbrede og tjene andre, herunder deres familier, venner og hele menneskeheden.

Talisman modtog jeg på det NWTA er nok min mest værdsatte besiddelse. Det oprindeligt var bare en rød pose på en lædersnor. I årenes løb har jeg tilføjet en masse af perler og andre genstande. Nogle jeg fik på andre kurser og retreats. Men de fleste kom i slutningen af ​​slutningen af ​​NWTAs at jeg bemandet for andre mænd.

Bemanding 36 NWTAs har givet mig nye venner og meget mere. Jeg har haft det privilegium at hjælpe og vidne hundredvis af mænd forvandle deres liv ved healing deres sår, omfavner en mission om service, og forbinder med andre mænd. Og jeg har vokset som menneske ved at arbejde på mål på hvert personale, såsom at sætte andre mænd til at være strålende, og som har mere tro på mig selv.

Ved at arbejde på de mål og være åben over for at lære noget helt uventet, jeg har forvandlet mig selv. Jeg anerkender næppe den irriterende, ængstelig, kontrollerende og selvhad mand, som jeg var næsten et årti siden, selvom jeg må indrømme disse kvaliteter undertiden stadig opstå.

Så jeg værdsætter mit Talisman som billede af min rejse til at være en kærlig og magtfulde mand. Det repræsenterer erfaringer, gaver givet og modtaget, transformation og empowerment, og, mest af alt, kærlighed.

Randy Marks

Randy Marks blev indviet i Menneskeheden Project i juni 2005. Han har fået sin BS, MBA og JD grader fra University of Pennsylvania. Han tjente som advokat Federal Trade Commission 1980-2014, primært arbejder for at fremme konkurrencen i sundhedsvæsenet industrier. I pension, hans mål er kærlighed, rejser, og service. Staffing NWTAs er en af ​​hans lovlydige lidenskaber. Han bor i Takoma Park, Maryland, lige uden for Washington, DC.

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Sollys Nederlag Skam

af Dave Klaus

Dave og regnbuen

Dave og regnbuen

Jeg har et meget anderledes forhold til skam, end jeg gjorde for et par år siden. Således som jeg har lært at tilgive og elske selv, det sjældent kommer op på alle. Men når det sker, vælger jeg at grave ret i, indsamle alle nyttige oplysninger fra den følelse, og så lade det gå.

Men jeg plejede at føle en masse skam.

Jeg troede virkelig, at der var noget galt med mig; at jeg var en freak, en sær snegl, sui generis: virkelig alene i verden. Når jeg har lavet en fejl, i stedet for at tilgive mig selv, jeg lige har tilføjet en anden grund til at føle sig dårligt.

Dataene er ikke rigtigt, at nyttige, men her er nogle eksempler på ting, jeg plejede at føle skam over: have dårlig acne, fortæller løgne, bliver dovne, der har ringe evne til at tale med piger / kvinder, som er privilegeret, at blive forkælet, bliver betyder for folk, og bedst af alt, skam for at være skamfuld.

Stemmen af ​​skam er kraftfuld. I modsætning til skyldfølelse, der føler sig dårligt for at gøre nogle specifikke handling, er skam det dårligt bare for at være. Sociolog Brene Brown fordel definerer skam som frygten for afbrydelse: en frygt for, at hvis en anden menneske nogensinde skulle virkelig kender mig og se ind i min sjæl, ville de rekyl i afsky og skyr mig for evigt.

Den grusomme ironi i denne tro er, at det fører til en mest snigende kur. Når jeg handle ud af skam, at min klodsede indsats beskytte mig selv fra dom og adskillelse fører mig til at præsentere en falsk front til verden; at isolere og skjule mig selv.

Den "helbrede" dermed producerer meget "sygdom" Jeg prøvede at undgå: at være alene!

Det gik noget som dette, når skam begyndte at tale: "Du er et bedrageri, et faker, du er en lort !! Hvis nogen virkelig kendte dig, ville du blive kneppet! INGEN ønsker dig! Ingen ville elske dig! Så ... Fortæl nogen sandheden. Foregive, at alt er lige stor !! Hold den i! "

UH. Det gør ondt at høre, at stemme igen.

Ved at skjule mine sande følelse, jeg oprettet en enecelle af skam.

Og i en tragisk velkendt cyklus, ville min sorg føre til skam, skam ville blive giftige, og så ville jeg uvægerligt falde i håbløshed og depression. Denne mørke funk kan vare i uger eller endda måneder, og var invaliderende til tider.

Heldigvis da Dr. Brown lærer, er der en effektiv kur mod skam, men det er ikke skjule: det er ærlighed og sårbarhed. Da jeg begyndte at ærligt dele mine følelser, frygt og bekymringer, fandt jeg, at de skrumpede og spredes overraskende hurtigt. Jeg begyndte at se, at når jeg er ærlig og kommende, når jeg gøre mig sårbar, folk rent faktisk kommer TÆTTERE stedet vige bort. Ofte de selv tak mig.

Stemmerne af skam er som vampyrer: de er uhyggelige og magtfulde i mørke, men når de udsættes for lys, de brænder væk. I den proces, de er ofte udsat som hylende morsomme og goofy jokere: Jerry Lewis foregiver at være Bela Lugosi.

Så næste gang du hører, at hectoring og nådesløs stemme skam, drej tabellerne på det: i stedet for at skjule dig selv i mørket, åbne nuancer og lad i solen.

Prøv at dele din sandhed med en god ven, med din støtte cirkel, eller måske endda med dine Facebook-venner.

Det bliver lettere og lettere med tiden og praksis, og du vil lære undervejs, som mange andre føler præcis som dig, men var bange for at sige det. Ved at udsætte dine følelser til sollys, du vil tillade dig selv at blive virkelig set og værdsat, og du vil vise andre, at det er sikkert og nyttigt at dele og være sårbare;

Du vil helbrede verden, selv når du helbrede dig selv ved at dele denne besked: sollys nederlag skam.

Dave Klaus

Dave Klaus fundet ny lidenskab og formål, når han tiltrådte menneskeheden Project i 2010. Det viser sig i sit arbejde som offentlig forsvarer i Oakland, Californien; i sit samfund, som leder og organisator; i sit kunstneriske liv som forfatter og digter; og vigtigst af alt, i hans familie, som en engageret far og ægtemand. Han har lige lanceret en ny blog   som du kan finde på www.daveklaus.net eller   på facebook på Breathe, Burn, Bee.

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Yep. Jeg var Joakim.

af Dave K

Sidste nat tog jeg min familie at se "A Christmas Carol." Det er blevet en tradition for os, og er virkelig en af ​​de få ferie traditioner, vi fejrer. Jeg har set dette show mange mange gange, men denne ene ramte mig særligt hårdt.

I årtier var jeg en Joakim, når det kom til jul. Jeg kunne skråle og rant om at dræbe træer og kommercialisme og falske midlertidige broderskab. Jeg var humbug igennem.

Meste selvom jeg fik trist og deprimeret.

Så en år min datter, 10, annoncerede "Jeg kan ikke lide julen enten fordi Daddy bliver så trist."

Dette ødelagt mig.

Pile i, pile Out.

Jeg gik til I-gruppen den næste dag og gjorde nogle store arbejde omkring ferie og min mor og den måde hun håndterede det (og mis-håndteret det.)

I den proces, jeg kom til et nyt sted for forståelse og medfølelse for min mor (som allerede havde passeret).

Jeg åbnede mit hjerte til ånden bag ferien: den samme ånd, vi fejre og dyrke i menneskeheden Projekt: service, empati, gavmildhed, optimisme, og selvfølgelig kærlighed.

Siden den nat har jeg faktisk nydt julen. Jeg lærte at dukke op for min familie i December, hvordan man kan give slip på min kynisme og domme og ånder dybt af fyrretræ og mistelten.

I går aftes, i teatret, indså jeg at Joakim havde sin egen helts rejse, hans egen New Warrior Training Adventure.

Han udforskede sin fortid, han vågnede op til nutiden, og han tog ansvar for fremtiden. Og det rystede ham til hans knogler. Han fandt taknemmelighed; bare for at være i live, for at trække vejret, for at være menneske.

Om morgenen, når han vågner i sin egen seng, han danser og synger og siger: "Jeg er en baby igen.". Og han løb ud til at give væk hans hjerte og hans penge.

Jeg var begyndt at græde tidligere i showet (virkelig så snart Tiny Tim viste), men nu var jeg fosser.

Jeg nåede over at røre min søn, og kløede sig tilbage og følte så meget kærlighed til ham og min datter og kone.

Jeg følte så meget taknemmelighed.

Jeg føler så meget taknemmelighed.

Så til jer modige og kærlige guider, du troldmænd og engle fra fortid og nutid, du ukuelig Bob Crachits, jeg takker dig. Hvis ikke for dig Mænd og dette arbejde, ville jeg stadig være en Scrooge, gemmer sig i mørket, separat, spise den tynde grød af depression. I stedet er jeg fri.

Det er en smuk dag, og det er jul, og jeg er i live. Jeg er en baby, igen.

Xoxoxo
dave / konge bi

Dave Klaus

I processen med at grave i mit indre liv, begyndte jeg healing gamle sår og i betragtning af mine vaner og tilgange til livet. Jeg, at jeg havde været i søvn ved rattet for en masse af liv, handler ud af ubevidste reaktioner. Da jeg besluttede at blive radikalt til regnskab for mine tanker, handlinger, ord, og selv mine følelser, jeg fandt en ny lidenskab og formål. Lær mere om mig på min blog: Træk vejret, Burn, Bee.

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3-6-5 4-3-2-1 - Ignition

Kategori: Udvalgte Content , Poetry

af Mike Morrell

Mit hjerte brændte i mig gerne en molotov cocktail
Smeltende forkrøblede organer fornuft og opfattelsen
Tredje øjne blinkende åben fra opvågninger uhøflig
Iriserende nattesyn ser seværdigheder lang afdæmpet.

Tricksters, guder og monstre befinder sig trukket i
Til drenge sparker off covers afslører sig som mænd
Uden undskyldning.

Ting skjulte dele hemmeligheder ved flimrende flammer
Word-making-enheder nu vender en side.

Hensynsløs nåde dukker op - nådesløst - plukke mig op fra jorden
Forkullet nukleare skygge hvor ubrugt samvittighed engang lå
Løftede fra min levn fra den første frygtelige drikke
"God" og "onde" hallucinationer - at overmoden frugt.
(Ferment)

"Rejs dig op, mand," Kali håner mig, blå engel død
Skrumpet hoveder mænd, der døde forsøger hængende mute 'runde hendes bryster
Hendes læber blev sendt venlighed, en delt øjeblik mellem os
Turde mig at gøre det bedre, Mars stiger fra Venus

Mens Michael, ærkeenglen, skabelonen af ​​mig
Står stille, original, mester i alt, hvad han ser
Beduin kriger of Thrones, ørken Jinn og lyse djævle,
Har arbejde at gøre, når mit apokalypse afregner.

Alchemy siver ned dybt i mine knogler
Blytunge drømme længe forladte nu spinne til guld
Drengens mareridt vække at finde sig selv mands legekammerater
(Midt aftenens deadline og næste uges blyantsrettelser play-datoer)

Eden - desværre - venstre mig ikke videresendelse adresse
Shangri-La (fra gemte frø) blomstrer nu i sin stedet
Kunne dette have-byen være ny Jerusalem reden?
Jeg har været at spare 'till nu; det er tid til at investere.

Invitationen er intuition
En ceremoni for anerkendelse - min krop og blodets rytmiske gentagelse
Merkurs metal på tungen og sved på min pande
Livets transubstantiation - her og nu.

Remembrance er re-kognition
Re-membering denne disposition
Det giver anledning - dengang og altid - for at originalen med forsiden
Holy Sun Absolut skinnende husly og nåde

Pindebrænde kompost af, hvad der var begyndt
Serafer og Destroyer opføre en sådan bål
Mad til Månen fra hele venstre fortrudte
"Hvorfor ikke helt ændret til ild?"

Mike Morrell

Mike Morrell beskriver sig selv som en wannabe mystiker og profet, ægtemand og far, elsker og ven. Han er også en prydede, håbefulde opti-mystiker Guds ven i vejen for Jesus - ligesom mange andre slyngler, ne'er-gør-brønde, og vil-være hellige. Han bor i Raleigh, NC, min kone Jasmin og to piger. Han er den Communications Director for Presence, en integreret bibelstudier nonprofit dedikeret til at bygge bro. Han er også den "brygmester" for Speakeasy Network , og medstifter af Wild Goose Festival . Han afsluttede den nye Warrior Training Adventure in maj 2011.

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Den slips, der binder

Kategori: Faderskab , Memoir

Af Tim O'Connor  

Som en server på en restaurant, min søn Corey bærer en uafgjort. Som pligtopfyldende far, har jeg altid forsynet ham med den far-Assist Tie. Det er, hvor jeg binde slips, som om jeg har tænkt mig at bære det, men glider det over mit hoved og give det til ham.

Men den tid kommer, når en 20 årige søn skal købe sin far en øl i en bar. Ingen ventetid ... den tid kommer i en ung mands liv, når han skal lære at binde sin egen forbandede slips.

For nylig bragte han sin ubunden slips til mig sagde-in essence- "Tiden er nu. Lær mig denne store færdigheder af manddom. "Blot et blink siden, jeg lærte ham at cykle. Nu ... dette.

Lektionen startede med hver af os med en lang længde hængende ned i højre side af vores kister, den korte side til venstre. Jeg havde ham stå ved siden af ​​mig ligesom vi var synkroniseret svømmere. Vi har ikke synkronisere.

Man, det er svært at lære noget, jeg gør i et spejl uden at tænke. "Hvordan fanden gør jeg det?" (Der er en golf lektion derinde et sted.) Til sidst lykkedes det mig at koordinere mine hænder og ord: »Fold dette rundt, og på, nu forbi ..."

Han forsøgte omkring 10 eller 12 gange, men efter hver lovende start, den store øjeblik, hvor den korte ende trækkes til at afsløre den trekantede mirakel en sprød knude fødte i stedet til noget, der lignede en motorvej udveksling lavet af blå striber.

Vi prøvede den med ham stå overfor mig. Nope. "Intet værd at gøre er altid let, søn," Jeg messede, naturligvis købe tid. "Modgang opbygger karakter."

"Right Hobbes," sønnen hånet, rettelig.

Sensing skal han gribe faklen (godt, slipset) og væve sin egen måde, Corey bundet, retied, bundet og ... indtil han vendte ansigtet op mod himlen, slog luften og brølede: "Jeg freaking gjorde det!" High-fives alle omkring.

Der var ingen stor lærestreg for mig-bare påmindelser om at være en far til mine to drenge. Vær der, gøre mit bedste for at vise dem, hvad de skal gøre, og derefter lukke fanden op og lad dem gøre ting for sig selv.

Den vigtigste brik i alt det? Vær der. Virkelig være der. Hvis vi kan gøre det som fædre, min følelse er, at båndene mellem fædre og sønner-og døtre-vokse strammere og stærkere.

Tim O'Connor

Tim O'Connor er en forfatter, der bor i Rockwood, Ontario, Canada, med en interesse i at finde ud af moderne maskulinitet og skarphed hans golfspil. Tim er medlem af The menneskeheden Project i Canada. Tims biografi MKP medstifter Rich Tosi vil blive offentliggjort i 2015. Hans seneste golf bog, The Single Plane Golf Swing: spille bedre golf i Moe Norman Way vil blive offentliggjort i februar 2015.

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So Far Within Reach - et digt

Kategori: Digte

af Jeffrey Bates

... En lille båd sad på klipperne på stranden
da han nærmede det føltes bare ud af hans rækkevidde
årerne de lå inde halvt oplyst
den gamle mand i sin stol drømte en drøm, da han blundede.

Strømmen fra bjerget ned til kysten
Hvor båden havde drømt om den mand, det vidste før
Han nærmede sig og han saa verden uden pleje,
Da han trak vejret i solen, følte den sprøde morgenluft.

Den gamle mand, han skiftede lidt i sin stol
Han havde troet, at han så en person stående der
"Get i!" Sukkede han, da han gik på kanten,
"Båden er klar, og kysten er ingen hæk."

Han slap endnu en gang i sin stol på verandaen
Den unge mand, han følte ingen flamme, men en fakkel.
Da han skubbede den lille båd fra klipperne på stranden
Hvad der engang var hidtil var nu inden for rækkevidde.

Februar 9, 2014

Jeff Bates

Jeffrey Bates, the author and illustrator of The Little Bucket , earned his BA from Anderson College (University), in Anderson, Indiana in Religion and Sociology (1985) and Master of Divinity degree from Christian Theological Seminary, Indianapolis, Indiana (1990). He has worked with children and youth for most of his career while serving churches, both full and part time and as a volunteer, from 1986-1996 and 2011-2014. He completed the New Warrior Training Adventure in 1996.

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The Little Bucket – A Children's Book – the Answer is Inside

by Boysen Hodgson


New Warrior brother Jeffrey Bates (Bedford, Indiana 1996), has written a mythical children's story called The Little Bucket . With a poetic voice and unique illustrations The Little Bucket is a hero's journey that will enliven and stimulate the imagination. The book teaches about empathy, boundaries, how to understand bullying, reaching out for help, and also about what it's like to feel lonely and lost and not know what to do about it.

When I got the book from Jeff earlier this spring, I shared it with my foster daughters. They both enjoyed the story, and it opened a much bigger conversation about what it means to look inside when things are hard. In a culture without a lot of strong models for emotional intelligence or personal responsibility, this is a story that can open some doors. It challenges blame and shame patterns that can get embedded so quickly in a child's psyche. I have referred back to the messages of The Little Bucket when working with my daughters to remind them that the what's going on on the 'outside' is only a tiny part of the reality … the BIG stuff is on the inside.

The thematic illustrations are gentle and colorful. The poetry flows with each turn of the page as the story moves through loss and revelation of a mysterious answer to the problem.

A reviewer commented, “Jeff Bates' use of rhyme and imagination creates a story to help readers of all ages to look within themselves and live life to its fullest.” (Roxanne L. Pace, Library Media Specialist, Brevard County, Florida)

Jeff Bates says, “One of the things we lack in our approach to helping build character in our children and feeling self-confidence is a model . The Little Bucket fills this gap and provides an opportunity for deeper discussion about the things that matter most: feelings. Once we can enable the discussion of feelings, we can make great strides in helping our kids concentrate better and become strong from within.”

He continues, “We are all overwhelmed by the entertaining digital world which really distracts kids from the real learning they need to be doing. I'm just not talking about 'school learning', but learning about what's going on on the inside .”

Additionally, when kids experience social pressure to conform and to give in to others, and feel distracted or intimidated by it, they can lose track of themselves, have difficulty concentrating and then spend the rest of their lives trying to recover.

Bates states that he is interested in selling the book, not just for the books sake, but for what can happen when it's heard. The Little Bucket can help kids discover themselves on the inside and, according to Psychotherapist Larry Pesavento of Cincinnati, Ohio, discover that “happiness is an inside job.”

If you have little ones, or big ones, and you struggle with starting a conversation around feelings such as sadness, fear, anger or even joy with them, this book can be a helpful kick-starter.

The Little Bucket is available at Amazon.com or BarnesandNoble.com to order. Also visit The Little Bucket on Facebook and be sure to give him a “LIKE.” Jeff also has The Little Bucket presentation where he comes to your group/class/school to present the story, have a discusion and then sing The Ballad of The Little Bucket . You can visit the author's page at http://jeffreybates.net for more information.

Boysen Hodgson

Boysen Hodgson is the Communications and Marketing Director for the ManKind Project USA, a nonprofit mentoring and training organization that offers powerful opportunities for men's personal growth at any stage of life. Boysen received his BA with Honors from the University of Massachusetts at Amherst, after completing 2 years of Design coursework at Cornell University. He has been helping companies and individuals design the change they wish to see in the world for 15 years. He's a dedicated husband.

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Loving Through My Shadow – a poem

Category: Men and Shadow , Poetry

by Les Gaines

What is this shadow following me, damn?
Just a lie of what I truly am.
A mark from yesterday
when some guy said I wasn't good enough to play.

That old stain has been like a stone
locking away my heart in a catacomb.

How can I live?
How can I breath?
With this mirage of limitation blinding my destiny.

I pay the price to feel worthy.
But still it's clear that I'm not free.
No, just a proxy of what I should be,
offering a little taste of what I could be.

So what about a little authenticity,
If I drop my spear,
if I drop my shield
if stand before you with my shame revealed,
If I let my mind settle in this space,
and show the of years of fears etched on my face,
then can I stay?
Can I stay and love you through my shadows anyway.

That shadow has a bind on me,
nothing I can do sometimes but say I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for my mother.
I'm sorry for my father.
I'm sorry for that freak down the street.
And that' they all called a geek.
I'm sorry for my big head.
I'm sorry for my fears.
I'm sorry that I bite back hard,
when I fell attacked, and I'm not clear.

But, if I say I'm sorry for being me,
can I stay and love you through my shadows anyway.

I know that …
kings have other mansion
and, boys other toys.
Lovers have other passions
and, warriors other ploys.
But a man has only one heart to feel.
And, if he's lucky he'll hold onto one friend that's real.
So, I will stay, I'll stay and love you through my shadows anyway.

Les Gaines

After gaining victory over disabling PTSD, Les Gaines returns to his mission as a healer, coach, speaker, and advocate for disabled survivors of childhood trauma. He is a certified metaphysical healer, and an avid student of Judeo/Christian mysticism, and shamanism. Les hopes to share his journey of healing and empowerment through his love of poetry, art, and music. Les completed the New Warrior Training Adventure in August 2012, and is a grateful member of the BWOE igroup in MD.

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I know trauma – a poem

Category: Men and Shadow , Poetry

by Les Gaines

As if asleep in a sea of denial, loathing my own shadow,
my faithful friend with me along so many miles.
I know the crippling fear of stepping beyond the front door;
that hope for a better life was best left ignored.

I know trauma.

I know the doubt that comes
when everybody wrong seems right,
and everything right seems wrong;
when every arm but mine looks strong.

I know the helplessness of trying to feel like something,
while my brain is screaming that I'm nothing.

I know trauma.

The intrusion of phantom hands, sounds, and scents
that cross the gap of time making danger feel so imminent.
Flashbacks they're called,
by those who walk with memory intact.
I know just how long that panic can last.

But, I also know the power of Goodness and Life
that shields a soldier in the most vicious of fights.
I know the strength of hands, ready to survive.

You see,
I know how to thrive.
How to search the infinite resources of mind,
to unlock the chains of shame restoring innocence,
I thought left behind.

I know the power of the yearning for freedom
that made me stand from my crawl, and
throw away that doormat that read, “free-for-all.”

This is my Life!
And it's time I change
the rules of that old abusive game
to restore each fragment of my Self to its rightful place.

I'll say who I am,
Love, Life, and Freedom.
I am Choice. I am Real.
I am here … with the courage to heal.

Les Gaines

After gaining victory over disabling PTSD, Les Gaines returns to his mission as a healer, coach, speaker, and advocate for disabled survivors of childhood trauma. He is a certified metaphysical healer, and an avid student of Judeo/Christian mysticism, and shamanism. Les hopes to share his journey of healing and empowerment through his love of poetry, art, and music. Les completed the New Warrior Training Adventure in August 2012, and is a grateful member of the BWOE igroup in MD.

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WOUNDED LEADERS: A Book Review

Category: Reviews

GUEST POST by Peter Clothier

Wounded Leaders: British Elitism and the Entitlement Illusion, ” by Nick Duffell.

First, don't assume from this book's subtitle that is irrelevant to us here in America, or to our leadership. It is of vital relevance, no matter the specificity of his target. Nick Duffell's title will have resonance for anyone who has lived through the past couple of decades in America and watched our own wounded leaders in action–or, more correctly, inaction. That said–and we'll come back to this–his central argument is that the boarding-school educated governing elite in Britain are themselves unconsciously governed by the lasting wounds incurred by the experience of being sent away from the family at an early age, and placed in a militaristic environment in which they learn to protect themselves from a hostile outer world.

I can speak to this. I am what Duffell aptly refers to as a Boarding School Survivor. As a practicing psychotherapist, he has a long-standing practice designed to bring such people back from their emotional disorientation and isolation. I could have used his services, long ago, but had to discover my own path through this maze. I was sent away to school at the age of seven, and by the time I escaped to freedom at the age of eighteen, I had received a remarkable head-oriented education but remained what I often describe as an emotional cripple. I had learned the costly and dangerous art of evasion and emotional invulnerability. As a seven- or eight-year old, I could not afford to do anything but suppress the feelings that would open me up to attack from my fellow-boarders: fear, anger, sadness, grief, the terrible pain of being separated from parents who assured me that they loved me—even though it was hard to understand the paradox of being loved and yet exiled from the family, the locus of that love.

The result of my excellent education was that I never grew up. Rather, it took me another three decades before I realized there was something wrong with living like a turtle in a shell. Boarding School Survivors, as Duffell describes them, are stunted individuals so caught up in their heads that they remain disconnected from their hearts. I simplify his profoundly well-informed and subtle arguments, whose bottom line is that Britain's ruling elite, boarding-school and Oxbridge-educated, are supremely unqualified to lead in our twenty-first century world because they get so intently focused on their distorted, rational vision of national and global issues that they remain impervious (invulnerable) to the bigger picture of human needs. They are unable to listen, to empathize with others than themselves and their own kind. They are guided by the certainty of their own sense of rectitude. To doubt, to question, to have a change of heart is to be vulnerable, and vulnerability is the last thing in the world they can allow themselves. (Duffell's final chapter, on doubt, is particularly eloquent and on-target.)

I am admittedly unqualified to evaluate the more technical aspects of Duffell's argument. To this reader, he seems impressively knowledgeable and up-to-date with the latest discoveries of neuroscience and academic psychology. He draws on a broad understanding of the philosophical development of rationalism and its critics, the countervailing social movements of repression and rebellion, and contextualizes his argument in that historical perspective. In our contemporary times, his exemplars are primarily the likes of former Prime Minister Tony Blair, England's current Prime Minister David Cameron, and London Mayor Boris Johnson, whose attitudes and actions are profoundly—and in Duffell's view—mistakenly reactionary. As he sees it, they bully and bluster their way past opposition into futile military actions and social programs that enrich the already privileged and wealthy and contribute to the continuing impoverishment of the needy. No wonder the England he describes is an angry country.

Late in the book, Duffell expands his vision of an entitled elite to include brief reference to American leaders—in particular, of course, George W. Bush, whose blind and reckless pursuit of a delusory obsession rushed us headlong into the war with Iraq. The disastrous results are with us today, in the form of a Middle East in unending turmoil. Looking at America today—a nation of people surely as angry as the British—I'd argue that what Duffell calls the Entitlement Illusion is by no means limited to British elitism. Our leaders must also be counted amongst the wounded. Our leadership is dominated by the squabbling of little boys who have never grown beyond the need to protect themselves and their own territory from those who do not agree with them. Our political problems are the same as those Duffell describes in his country: militarism, misguided and prejudicial rationalism, a lack of empathy for the poor and underprivileged, an assumption of rectitude that rejects other views without a hearing, an angry rejection of doubt or reappraisal of previously held views.

Entitlement, I'd argue, is not the exclusive property of the British elite. I myself believe it's also, more broadly, a factor of historical male privilege, the patriarchal tradition. There is a persistent myth in our culture that sees men as rational beings, in control of events, capable, practical, while women are (still, in the eyes of too many of us men) perceived as irrational, guided by emotion rather than reason, and therefore less competent in leadership positions. Duffell argues passionately for a middle path, one that minimizes neither reason nor emotion, but balances the intelligence quotient with the emotional quotient, the head with the heart, reason with compassion and empathy. I agree with him, that unless we as a species can find that balance, we are in for dangerous times ahead. His book is a timely and important reminder of the need to “change our minds” in a fundamental way, and open ourselves to the powerful–and practical–wisdom of the heart. I sincerely hope that the book will find readers beyond the native country of which he writes. Its insights are profoundly needed everywhere, throughout the globe.

Watch for Peter Clothier's forthcoming novel about masculine sexuality, “The Pilgrim's Staff” (an old euphemism for the penis.) It's told by two narrators, a contemporary figure painter and and 18th century English gentleman. Frank sex scenes and potboiler excitement! Peter is a 1994 NWTA initiate, a one-time active Ritual Elder, and a well-known art writer. His latest book, “Slow Looking: The Art of Looking at Art,” explores the values of contemplation and meditation. Feel free to write him at peter clothier@mac.com .

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A Circle of Men

by Les Gaines

I sit in a circle with Men
who are ready to go within,
whose eyes blaze like diamonds in disguise
and whose bodies are poised with determination.

Unwilling to compromise,
and using clever minds as a honing device,
the brothers listen in.
For groans and moans of shadows and doubts
that utter, “I am less than.”

In this circle of men,
we find traces of hopes we've seen before,
hidden behind childhood doors
arousing pain we must explore.

And in that journey we find our life's mission
to be who we are, without seeking permission.
To do what good men have always done,
be willing to be “the One.”

In this circle of men,
a warrior rises to the occasion,
to see the world he made
and claim his power to change it.

Here hands beat upon drums,
And, masculine roars form our songs,
calling the four directions, the sky and the earth
and upon ancestor's shoulders we take up our work.

In this circle of men,
there is power to turn ore to steel,
to dissolve every illusions that prevents
living a life that is real.

In this circle of men,
there is truth in projections
and healing when a man encounters his own golden reflections.

Les Gaines

After gaining victory over disabling PTSD, Les Gaines returns to his mission as a healer, coach, speaker, and advocate for disabled survivors of childhood trauma. He is a certified metaphysical healer, and an avid student of Judeo/Christian mysticism, and shamanism. Les hopes to share his journey of healing and empowerment through his love of poetry, art, and music. Les completed the New Warrior Training Adventure in August 2012, and is a grateful member of the BWOE igroup in MD.

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The Rising of Basic Goodness — Embodiment in a Global Society

Category: Poetry

by Two Crows Calling

First we took a hard look at our ego self
Speaking our feelings of what we wanted in love, work and a peaceful world
Discovering in our dyads and in our meditation that what
we yearned for was so often in breakdown,
“stalled”, not happening.

We saw our own self sabotage, living in illusion, deceit,
blaming others, caught in subtle consumer and family
dramas. Our list of counterfeit, cocoon traits hit home
as endlessly discouraging. For us, “looking good”so often
won out over just being Goodness.

Sitting, we connected deeply with our own “messiness”
We had placed our cart before the Wind horse of our Life.
We were not living from Buddha's last words
“Be a Lamp unto Yourself”

What good fortune the dharma overcame our doubt, fear and
timidity. We were rescued by energies far more powerful
and vast than the dominant culture's repetitive story lines.

Our practice sharpened our will and expanded our hearts.
Our teachers inspired us –breathing truth and love into us.

One day, you finally said a full and deep “YES”
You whispered into your own heart. “OK. I'm tired of being
sick and tired of all my half- hearted measures.”

You told your mind and heart. “I am ready to take it all on”.

I am ready to take the pain and heartache of society into my
own tender, vast and spacious Heart.

And you stepped forward to the front of history's grand stage
You realized the poet Rilke was right after all:

“Whatever the question, Love is the Answer.”

Starvation spreads in Africa and the Middle East while grain rots
in our Midwestern grain storage reserves. More love needed. The 37,000
infant and child deaths every day from polluted water. More of my love needed.

The seemingly endless deaths of mothers and young children in Syria.
More love needed. Clean water for the children? More love from me.
Breaking the horror of human trafficking and slavery?
More love from me.

We leaned into the Wind. Into the Storm. Into the Darkness
of our present Age. We rejoiced in the advancement of Goodness.

We found the dharma was our Shield,our Sword. Our Light.
We felt in our bones “This is my moment.This is our moment.”

And so with each breath, we opened wide our hearts to the pain
and suffering of this world.

Over time our field of action expanded more and more. Sacred warriors
of basic goodness appeared at our side. We became a Oneness.

Together my sisters and brothers
We go forth across this vast world
fertile seeds in the Wind
Making Enlightened Society Possible.
Shambhala! Shambhala!

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The Butterfly King – Edmond Manning on Writing and Daring

Category: Memoir , Men and Sex , Reviews

by Edmond Manning

By what right does a white man tell the story of a black man? Describe that man's struggles, the lifelong challenges he faces, the hardships of living in a white-centric culture?

I have asked myself this question many times.

In September, the third book in my 'Lost and Found Kings' series, The Butterfly King was published. The premise is the same in each book: a gay, Midwestern car mechanic invites another man to spend the weekend together. He promises “…if you submit in every single way, I will help you remember your kingship. I will help you remember the man you were always meant to be.”

Lyder det bekendt?

It's a bastardization of the NWTA weekend. Well, kinda. There are absolutely no affiliations or mentions of MKP in the novel. There is not a fictional organization cleverly renamed “LKP.” Nope. No crossover activities. None. The car mechanic narrator relies on Joseph Campbell and the masculine archetypes to create experiences that help each man discover his unique giftedness. Combined with fairy tale storytelling, emotional manipulation, and a healthy scoop of man-on-man sex, these books have attracted attention for their innovative look at the masculine psyche and the possibility that all men are kings.

I've delighted in writing about different types of men. My tall tales celebrate the power of men, the beauty of men, which includes their woes: the lifelong consequences on a man whose father died young (the first book, King Perry), an angry man who feels betrayed by love and how shitty his life turned out (the second book, King Mai), and the most recent book, my third, deals with a black man in New York city who sacrificed his own future to care for his family.

The Butterfly King.

But by what right does a white man tell a black man's story?

No right.

I find myself in a curious and difficult position. I want to write about interesting people and fascinating lives. It's what writers do, I guess. But how dare a pasty-white, middle-class man attempt to get inside the head of a man of color? I can't possibly know the circumstances of prejudice he experienced growing up and throughout adulthood. It's very possible my attempts to portray empathy come across as condescending, ill-informed, and patronizing. I worry about this. It keeps me awake at night.

A curious parallel exists in my fiction genre.

Right now, most of the books written about the men-loving-men are written by heterosexual women. I'm not kidding. They compose the lion's share of the market of both writers and readers. Some have adopted a man's name for better acceptance or to hide their identities, afraid of the backlash. Most are open and proud of their writing prowess. In fact, gay men now find it difficult to publish their stories—honest-to-gayness-men-loving-men stories—because women so dominate this field and their preferences have become industry traditions. Gay men must conform to these industry standards to get published or be marginalized.

Huh.

The debate comes up three times a year or more in the blogosphere. By what right do women step in and tell gay men's stories? By what right? They don't experience gay bashing, homophobic slurs, and hell, they don't even have the right junk.

And yet, they write. They dare.

The reasons fascinate me. They feel called. Because the stories are about love. Because it's more interesting than writing about their known world, male-female relationships. Some of these women have gay kids, gay friends, gay garage mechanics and they want to make the world safer, more accepting. Whatever their reasons, they dare.

I love this. They dare.

Don't we also dare?

As men in MKP, don't we dare to love men different from ourselves? Don't we step outside our comfortable skins to love men of different ages, of different colors? Don't Republicans sometimes cradle Democrats as they weep over lost marriages? Have you not seen some granola, hippie leader love a young corporate go-getter, doing whatever it takes to honoring that man's kingship? I know you have.

I've seen it, too.

We do not interfere in each other's lives because it's our right to do so. We do it because we dare to love each other as men, as brothers.

I researched this book thoroughly. I read about shifting ethnic migrations to and from New York City from the 1950s through the 2000s. I read books about race. I read articles about white authors attempting to write black characters. I read blogs about blind-spots in dominant culture and how it shows up in insidious, exclusionary ways. I'm glad I did this research, but none of it gives me the right to write.

But I dare.

I write about men of color because I have loved men of color. I have wept in their arms and they in mine. We told our sad stories and felt each other's masculine healing. On staff weekends, we have wiped away each other's sweat and tears, and went back to the carpet if not refreshed, certainly more sturdy. More ready to bear the next sorrowful tale.

We celebrate each other by telling these stories, stories which are not always ours to tell.

I remember a night long ago when my I-group decided my work that night was to share my coming out story. I shrugged. Although I had been complaining of the lifelong estrangements it has caused, I felt it wasn't really relevant. Happened over two decades ago. As I told the experience telling my parents I was gay, two of the straight men in my group cried. Another man said, “Listen to me repeat this to you.”

When I heard my own story coming from his mouth, I cried myself because the story —surprise, surprise— was sad. Although he repeated a few details wrong, he heard and honored the spirit of the tale. Apparently I had to hear it from someone else to recognize the sadness.
When I think about this latest novel, I'm sure I fucked up in a few places because, like most of us, I sometimes fuck up when I'm attempting a big project. That is one story about me. Here is another story I learned by working with MKP: I am also glorious, ridiculously bold and I radiate effervescent, sparkling love from my fingertips when I type fiction. I have the power to reveal how gorgeous, how beautiful men can be.

I celebrate us.

And so, I dare.

Butterfly King

Edmond Manning is the author of a series, The Lost and Founds. The first three books in this series include King Perry, King Mai (a Lambda Literary finalist 2014), and most recently, The Butterfly King. Feel free to say hello at remembertheking@comcast.net .

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Arbejde på Min "To Be 'liste

by Stephen Simmer – MKP USA Mission Circle Coordinator

I don't read emails, I scan them. The idea of slowing down and staying fully present with a thought is very difficult, very foreign to me. If you're like me, you might notice a persistent voice, right now, telling you to hurry through this email, to grab the point that Simmer is making, deposit into the meaning-bank for possible future use, and move onto the next email waiting in the inbox. If you're like me, right now you're saying to yourself, “I got it” and hurdling over phrases and sentences to get to the next paragraph to see if there's more you need to grab. If you're like me, you don't read, you plunder for necessary meaning as if you're looting a store for a couple of things of value.

I'm also aware that I'm that way with many parts of my life I supposedly care about. I listen with a half an ear to my kids, I listen to my wife impatiently, hoping she will get to the point so I can move on, I hurry down the road with my dogs to get the walk out of the way as fast as I can so I can get onto some other tasks that I can also hurry through.

When I think of working more on mission, there is a voice in me that says emphatically, “I don't have time to do any more.” The conveyer belt is too fast already. I need to work, sack the trash, lug the air conditioners back to the garage, order the stone for the patio, pick up the prescription. Mission? Maybe I can schedule some world-transformation Tuesday between my son's soccer game and grilling the burgers. If I can't sandwich it in there, I'll get to it next lifetime, or the one after that. My mission gradually becomes my o-mission, what I leave out.

This is all wrong. I was taught on my training many years ago that a mission statement had a vision and an action. An action: I saw it as another task on my endless to-do list. But what if mission is not a job? What if it's really a presence? What if it's a challenge to do less, with magnificence? What if it means slowing down, committing to be fully present in this ordinary, splendid moment? What if mission means that I commit myself to be a human be-ing rather than a human do-ing? What if busy-ness is a symptom of evasion of what really matters?

Athletes talk of special times when the game slows down, and maybe mission is really about a commitment to slowing life down so that moments become momentous. These are the moments of Flow that Mihaly Csikszentmihaly identified. This precious moment with my son outside school when he quietly takes my hand as we walk. This encounter with the CVS clerk. This walk with my dog in the rain, both of us dying, him probably a few steps ahead of me, leading the way. I'm ditching my to-do list and starting a to-be list. And what is startling to me is that there is only one thing on the list: to answer the door and welcome the visitor who has been waiting.

Stephen Simmer

Steve Simmer, for those of us privileged to know him, lives his life in the midst of the constant stream and theme of mission. Appropriately enough, one of his formal mission statements is that he “creates a world of freedom by encouraging men with my courage to do all that they can be and to be all that they can do.” By profession a psychotherapist, he works continuously to inspire men to actively find and engage in their own mission in this world. Dr. Simmer afsluttede New Warrior Training Adventure tilbage i 2001, og har aldrig været den samme mand siden.
Hvis du vil vide mere om Steve og hans arbejde, kan du besøge hans hjemmeside

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My Poem 310: Meeting Wisdom

My Poem 310: Meeting Wisdom

The shaman knows those noises…
They sometimes disturb the hunt…they
are sometimes the result of the hunt…
You see, the shaman has kept
to his roots, not like the shamans
reed flute, having been cut from
its root, its soundings are the
lamentations of the broken hearted
which the shaman knows but he
Also knows of the healed heart…
knows the Icy grags and shadowed
vales…becoming knowing of the songs…
Of the void between notes, between
the lyrics, between the breath taken
in and the breath expelled… There
he finds the knowing of Wisdom…
There, he meets Her…Mother Sophia

——-

Addenda i54: Oscar Wilde said,

“Ah! Don't say you agree with me. When
people agree with me I always feel that I must be wrong.”

Do our poems have
to please everyone?
Do we have
a responsibility to be provocative?

Ja! MEN!
We Have That Responsibility!

Of course! We have that responsibility!
Wilde said that! Wilde lived that!
Our 'modern' circumstances demand that …
How could we not … but to invite another Hitler …

Gaia, Mother Earth is demanding that!
Creating storm after massive storm
beyond our experience …

I am demanding that! … of
my Brothers & my Sisters!

The call has been made! It is international!
grass rooted, calling but walked upon …
springing back up into the calling air …
but CALLING again … every society … every Heart
The Mother and mothers everywhere are calling …
Fathers drop war from your consciousness.
It has no future … It begets no future …

But … ITSELF!
And an Earthen hell is the result …
Over and over … again and again …

MEN! What more proof need be portrayed than that goriest
Glorious 20th Century …???

MEN…WHO ARE WE THAT WE CAN”T SEE
IN ALL THIS LIGHT???!!!

Wali Qutbuddin Loren Ruh Smith
August 6, 2014

Qutbuddin Loren Ruh Smith: I'm 75 years old, born in Tacoma, WA and went to high school in Arcata, CA. I served in the US Army, met my first wife and had our first son in France. I started writing poetry in my first college English class in 1961. I've published a book called The Path to The Beloved and I have several books ready to publish. I lived in the Sierras in Grass Valley for 30 years before moving to Albuquerque, NM, in 2012. My book about fathers and sons called This Child and His Tree will be going to the publishers shortly.

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BOYHOOD: Not Exactly a Film Review

GUEST POST: by Peter Clothier

Originally published at the Buddha Diaries

(for Luka, a bit later in his life)

I woke this morning thinking about Barack Obama, and how perfectly he fits the model of manhood proposed by Rudyard Kipling in his unjustly maligned and frequently parodied poem “If.” In case you don't remember it, here's how it starts out:

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise…

Doesn't that sound like Obama?

First, though, Boyhood, which provoked these thoughts. We finally got to see this beautiful and profoundly moving film last night. I loved the twelve-year journey of these skillful and committed actors, playing out the emotional development of fictional characters engaged in a fictional narrative as they themselves physically aged. I loved the “truth” of the story itself, of a family struggling with the realities of life—the failed and failing marriages, the financial woes, the abuse of alcohol and drugs, sibling love and feuding, school and the relationships with classmates, the pain of the teenage years, and so on. All along, start to finish, the story had the convincing “feel” of life as most of us experience it.

And the film is true to its title. It is about boyhood. Even at the end, the young boy, Mason, whose life we have been following from elementary school to college has not yet emerged fully into manhood. The last shot shows him, literally high in the beautiful natural surroundings of the mountains, and high on the mushroom fed him by his brand new college roommate. With a lovely young woman at his side—they sit still shyly side by side and not in some false, premature embrace—he gazes out in ecstasy into the landscape as though into a future filled with allure. But it is abundantly clear that he is still a boy. Boyhood still glows in his face; he's all promise, no completion.

Which should not surprise us. He had no models of real manhood as he was growing up. Mason's biological father is a charming rogue in his early years, unable to accept the responsibilities of marriage, job, and family. The subsequent relationships his mother forms are with men whose manhood is as questionable as his father's: a smooth academic whose insecurities lead him to drunken tyranny; a former military man whose immaturity is revealed in his insensitivity and inflexibility. With one notable exception—a photography teacher who attempts to move our Mason beyond his obstinate, lethargic adolescence—the strong, mature figures who surround the growing boy are women. The men are simply grown-up little boys.

Which leads me to reflect, beyond the parameters of the movie, upon this question: what are the qualities of manhood? We find what I think of as a real man all too infrequently in our contemporary world. We are surrounded everywhere by ungrown men: the drunks, the abusers, the workaholics; priests and teachers who take advantage of their positions of trust and exploit the vulnerabilities of children; lovers who take what they need and reject responsibility; politicians who lack the spine to govern and capitulate too easily to those who would manipulate them; gun-toting idiots who insist so stridently on their “rights” and are quick to spurn the rights of others; sports heroes pumped up with illicit drugs and phony testosterone; spoiled cultural idols, many of them scarcely more than teenagers.

Too often, the models of manhood we are offered are characterized by a false notion of strength. To return to the President and his current predicament, surrounded as he is by well-meaning progressives to the left and fanatics blinded by their own rectitude on the right, all nipping at his heels and demanding displays of strength. They fail to understand that the qualities of true strength are not intellectual inflexibility and rash, foolhardy action (the former President and his enablers come inevitably to mind) but the maturity to step back and take the longer view, the wisdom to listen and, when necessary, to change. Even to bend. That too is strength. They have not learned the ancient lesson of the oak tree and the reed .

The qualities of manhood, in my view, are these: integrity, a sense of mission, a devotion to service. We know how to teach these qualities. We do it with our military men in boot camp (women, too, these days, of course, but I'm concerned here with men.) While I'm not a fan of militarism in any form, I'll concede that in most cases even this crass form of initiation can produce admirable men—men who have not only strength and skills, but a sense of purpose greater than themselves. Our armed forces are worthy of the respect that they receive. What turns boys to men is this kind of ritualized initiation—a process that's significantly lacking in the development of the youngster who's portrayed in “Boyhood,” as it is to the majority of us today. Of myself, if I'm to be honest, I must acknowledge that I reached some measure of manhood only in my fifties. For genuine initiation in our culture we have substituted such tepid rituals as Christian confirmations and bar mitvahs.

They don't do the trick. In traditional cultures, the transition was a far more dangerous journey, involving genuine threat to life and limb as boys were sent out into wilderness or jungle to temper the vulnerability and fearfulness of boyhood into the steel they would need to function as a man. We in the modern Western world have no wild animals to deal with, unless we count those within. We forget that these are powerful enough to rule our lives if we don't learn to acknowledge and confront them. The early myth of initiation for us is the ordeal of the knight apprentice, who rides out into the forest to test his mettle against the dark knight—or the dragon—and returns prepared to serve his queen.

What is integrity? In simple terms, it is the fortitude to say fearlessly exactly what I mean, and do exactly what I say. Which implies, of course, a clear vision about who I am and what I am given to do. If I'm in doubt or confusion, I lack resolve. I dither. The answer lies not in denying doubt and confusion—they are a part of being human. No one escapes them. In denying them I risk precipitous and futile action, when what I need first is to consult the inner wisdom that I've wrestled with myself to find, and rediscover the clarity before I act. A man of integrity is a man who “has his act together,” in the sense that his actions are in full congruence with his words. He has “integrated” the four mainstays of his being: mind and body, feeling and spirit, and they are properly in balance. Action that is not backed by all four of these in unison–action that lacks thought, or heart, or energy, or purpose–is as ineffectual as the failure to act at all.

Inseparable from a man's integrity, then, is the understanding that he has left behind the innocence of boyhood, along with the freedom that accompanied it. He lives in a world of accountability to others and acknowledges his duty (yes, sorry, a quaint, old-fashioned concept!) to serve others than himself. Sadly, it's true that most of us fail to live up to this ideal. We look around us, searching vainly for the most part for our Mahatma Gandhis, our Nelson Mandelas, our Martin Luther Kings—men who were certainly not lacking in the failings that made them human, but who managed to be magnificently greater than their weaknesses, and of spectacular, historical service to their fellow human beings.

We cannot all be men like these, but we can be men. Without the challenge of traditional initiation rites, we are required to find, or invent, our own journey from boyhood into manhood. It is no easy task to face the darkness and the inner demons that, without our awareness, can control our destinies. All of us need some form of support as we make that journey: a church, perhaps, a spiritual guide, a trained therapist… And the journey, for most of us, is never ending. Who can sit back on his laurels and say with certainty: I have reached the fullness of my manhood? Even in, at best, my last quarter here among the living, I still struggle with my own.

So we leave our young protagonist, in “Boyhood,” with the journey into manhood still ahead of him. He may already have been initiated into sex and drugs, into the drudgery of work and now, finally, the college dormitory, but none of these has opened the door to the real, deep, inner work he will have to do if he is to become the man he needs to be if he is to fulfill his life's destiny. And that is yet to come…

Watch for Peter Clothier's forthcoming novel about masculine sexuality, “The Pilgrim's Staff” (an old euphemism for the penis.) It's told by two narrators, a contemporary figure painter and and 18th century English gentleman. Frank sex scenes and potboiler excitement! Peter is a 1994 NWTA initiate, a one-time active Ritual Elder, and a well-known art writer. His latest book, “Slow Looking: The Art of Looking at Art,” explores the values of contemplation and meditation. Feel free to write him at peter clothier@mac.com .

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The Transformational Power of Daily Rituals

By Gonzalo Salinas

According to Charles Duhigg author of The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business , approximately 40% of what we do every day, we do unconsciously. We have formed a habit that we tend to repeat every day, and it's making our choices for us.

So, think about all the things you do every day. Some of them probably don't serve your highest purpose but still, you repeat them religiously … even knowing specific behaviors are putting you away of the reality you want to live. Duhigg explains that every time you repeat those habits your brain reinforces them … so it craves, later on, this repetition. Even if is not beneficial, you get a neuro-chemical reward in your brain that not only will create some sort of addiction but also reinforces the identity you have created for yourself.

I have tried many times to change bad habits and create new ones. With a sincere heart I must confess that I have failed more times than I have succeeded. But I noticed something happened every time I was succeeding; the positive new habits were daily rituals.

Ja. I do have rituals. Ritual – “a series of actions or type of behavior regularly and invariably followed by someone.” I repeat certain rituals every day, and believe me dear reader of the MKP Journal, to repeat an action every day, is not an easy task, especially when I am trying to create a new self.

Let me share some daily rituals hoping that this will inspire action to enhance lives.

I do my rituals first thing in the morning: I wake up and I go for a run. The running part is simple. I already told myself that as soon as I hear the alarm I must jump out of the bed. At the beginning it was hard, now is automatic. My recommendation is to avoid dealing with ANY logistics – so your sportswear must be ready next to the bed from the previous night.

rising-sun

A second ritual is: I carry in my wallet one handwritten page. One side of the page is divided in two: on the left side I have a few statements: my flaws or weaknesses to become aware of what I want to change, and on the right side my good qualities and virtues to remind myself the tools I have for my own growth. Deliberately this second list is bigger than the first one. On the other side of the paper I've written a brief composition about who I want to be. I've included goals and projects and a description of how I see myself in the next three years.

I read this paper three times a day. As soon as I wake up, at lunch time, and before I go to sleep. It takes me two minutes each reading. When I read it I focus on staying present: just reading.

Third: In the morning I also do a brief visualization … right before I come back from running I stop and I visualize: It takes me three to five minutes. I visualize the same three goals I have written on the paper I carry on my wallet.

Finally, is my gratitude time. On a notebook I got specifically for gratitude, right before I go to sleep, I write three things that I'm grateful for that day. It doesn't matter if it's as simple as “the kid I saw having some ice cream at Lincoln road in South Beach.” If I feel like writing it, I write it. Then I say a brief prayer, and I go to sleep.

These four rituals have changed my life   dramatically in the last two years. Have I been 100% consistent with them?… absolutely not. I used to give to myself a guilt trip, this usually led me to abandon my regular practice for a while. If for some reason I miss my rituals now, instead of the self punishment, I just carry on.

Det er det. Just a couple of thing before I finish: You may notice that my rituals are very simple; they are simple because when I create a complex plan, I find I'm planning to fail. Start small and keep going; it is a great exercise of self love.

And lastly, be creative with your rituals! Some people create a vision boards with images, others do mantras or incantations, others meditate or do breathing exercises. The rituals become habits because of repetition, and the daily practice causes transformation.

I've got more from my 2 years of rituals than from my entire previous life without them. Use them and then you tell me!

Gonzalo photo

Gonzalo Salinas is an Assistant Editor for the ManKind Project Journal, a publication of the ManKind Project, a nonprofit mentoring and training organization offering powerful opportunities for men's personal growth at any stage of life. Salinas studied Literature in Lima, Peru at San Marcos University, and has been living in the United States since 2003. He lives in Miami, FL. Salinas is committed to his own personal development, and to spreading the word about the vision and mission of the Mankind Project .

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Your Distraction Vortex – Purpose Block #3

af Chris Kyle

If you missed the special Live Q&A call on April 15 for the Man on Purpose Course and want to listen to the audio, go to the Man on Purpose Course web site to listen.

Over the last week, I've shared with you the first two core Purpose Blocks which are:

Purpose Block #1 = the Fear Triad
Purpose Block #2 = the Doubting Voice

Now it's time to explore the third of the 3 Purpose Blocks. Purpose Block #3 is the Distraction Vortex .

In our modern, media-saturated and technology-driven culture we have a never-ending list of things we can do in our daily lives to keep us busy and our schedules extremely full.

The daily choices are mind-boggling … TV shows, books, internet surfing, sports, phone calls, porn, email, movies, hobbies — and on and on and on. And all of this is in addition to our daily work (that hopefully pays the bills).

All these possible activities make up the Distraction Vortex: a swirling pool of constant and seemingly endless things TO DO … that can suck up all of our precious time.

None of these activities, in and of themselves, are inherently “good” or “bad.” However, if we are spending much of our time in the Distraction Vortex — there is a good chance that we are also distracting ourselves from what we might want most in our lives: deeper connection, greater joy, more meaning, and a clearer sense of purpose.

And because the journey into these states can be more subtle and unclear, it's frankly easier and likely more soothing to numb-out or check-out with a juicy distraction like a TV show, a series of YouTube videos, or a trashy novel.

The challenge and question is, “How do I consciously navigate this Distraction Vortex, so it doesn't suck up all of my time — and instead frees up my time for focusing on living more fully into my purpose?”

Here are three steps you can take to help set you free from the Distraction Vortex.

1. Slow Down and Observe Your Activity
The first step is to use whatever stillness practice you have, like meditation or mindfulness, to slow yourself down each day (and if you don't have one, then start one), and begin to observe what pulls your attention toward what you would consider unhealthy distractions.

Then take on a one week “distraction awareness practice” by tracking where you are spending your time in the activities that you consider distractions. This brings to conscious awareness what activities YOU use as distractions to not face something else in your life.

2. Notice What You're Avoiding
The second step is to notice what you may be avoiding in your life that the distractions helps you not have to face. It is typically something you don't want to look at, and which makes you uncomfortable… something that you struggle with in your life.

Being more conscious of the activity, feeling or the energy that you're avoiding helps to burst the bubble on your distraction patterns. Now you have the awareness to make a new choice about whether to engage the specific distractions or not.

3. Recommit with Support
As you see more clearly how your particular distractions don't serve you, you can now recommit yourself to the actions and activities that truly support and serve you — your own growth and your purpose.

By declaring your commitment to the activities that feed your passions and purpose to another person close to you helps you stay accountable to not slipping back into the unhealthy distractions. This support is key to breaking out of the Distraction Vortex.

In the Man on Purpose Course, starting tomorrow (April 17, 2014), we spend two of the 7 weeks on looking at the patterns and habits that take us out of the fuller expression of our authentic power, creativity and purpose. This helps clear the way to bringing more energy and power to our purpose.

To your distraction-free purpose,
Chris

PS The Man on Purpose Course starts tomorrow, April 17th, and there's still time to register and lock in your seat in the course. Go here to register for the course. One man who took the course last year said:

“The course opened me up to the desire and passion to start living as a man who lives to be more of service in all aspects of life. Not “what is my purpose?” but rather how to LIVE with purpose!” — Edward Werger

Chris Kyle

Chris has trained and coached hundreds of individuals to achieve greater success in their businesses and their lives. In partnership with The ManKind Project® USA, he recently created The Power of Purpose Summit and the Man On Purpose online course. He is also the co-creator, with Amy Ahlers, of the ongoing tele-series, New Man, New Woman, New Life.

In addition to his leadership development work, Chris has spent over 24 years as an executive, entrepreneur, consultant and business coach, working in Fortune 500 companies and owning his own eco-adventure travel company. Chris uddannet fra Stanford University, hvor han studerede statskundskab. He lives with his wife in Northern California.

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Curious about Why you are Here? Special Q&A Call!

Special Q&A Call Tonight & Important Announcement

We've received a lot of great questions over the last week around the topic of purpose and wanting to know more about our upcoming course — Man On Purpose: The Essential 7-Week Online Course for Men which starts on April 17th.

As I mentioned in my last post, George Daranyi and I will be hosting a special interactive Q&A call tonight – Tuesday April 15th. We will be answering some of the most frequently asked questions about the course, and also about how you can access your hidden power to activate your passions and purpose in the world.

If you have any lingering questions about the course, please join this special Q&A call TONIGHT, MARCH 15TH at 5:30 pm Pacific Time to get the answers you need.

===========================================

Here's how to access the Q&A Session with George and me:

TONIGHT at 5:30 pm Pacific / 8:30 pm Eastern / 12:30 am+1 UTC

To listen by webcast online, go to:

http://InstantTeleseminar.com/?eventid=54169320

To listen by phone dial:
Number: (425) 440-5100
Access code: 405934#

============================================

A number of men who have experienced the work with us were eager to share how it had improved and changed their lives:

“They showed me how I had been asleep for most of my life, and how I needed to “awaken” and take charge of my life, to take responsibility and be accountable for my actions. In the program, I received the tools to get back into integrity with my family, my friends, and mainly with myself… I learned that it in order to make a difference in this world, to live into my purpose, I first had to change myself.” — Joe A.

“Chris' approach helped me to see where I'm not showing up fully in my life and the shadows that were holding me back. His intuition and awareness guided me to confront these shadows and helped me stay present, even when it was uncomfortable. With Chris's help, I found my growing edge and learned how to take what I experienced in the sessions into my professional and social life, my intimate relations and most of all, my inner journey. By experiencing this place of “deep knowingness”, purpose and fierce love, I experienced the essence of my true nature.” — Tim C.

I also wanted to let you know that our 3-payment option ends this Friday. So if you're planning to register for the course and would benefit from the option of spreading the payments over three months, be sure to register by tomorrow to take advantage of this opportunity.

To learn more and register visit the course information page.

To living your purpose,
Chris Kyle & George Daranyi

Chris Kyle

Chris has trained and coached hundreds of individuals to achieve greater success in their businesses and their lives. In partnership with The ManKind Project® USA, he recently created The Power of Purpose Summit and the Man On Purpose online course. He is also the co-creator, with Amy Ahlers, of the ongoing tele-series, New Man, New Woman, New Life.

In addition to his leadership development work, Chris has spent over 24 years as an executive, entrepreneur, consultant and business coach, working in Fortune 500 companies and owning his own eco-adventure travel company. Chris uddannet fra Stanford University, hvor han studerede statskundskab. He lives with his wife in Northern California.

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