Hiding Out in Oz
by Geoff Laughton
When you are looking at what makes your relationship(s) (oh hell…and life itself) challenging and difficult, it will help to really examine the power and Modus Operandi of shame. It’s often been called the Master Emotion, and while it may not really be that for you, you sure can count on the fact that, to the degree you have it and don’t know how to work with it, it will become your Master and the insidious, stealth bomber on the well-being of your relationship(s). It’s a huge topic, so today, I want to share about just one facet of how shame can control you that is worth paying sober attention to.
A report from Oslo in the wake of terror
Flowers outside the Oslo Peace center
Eivind Skjellum writes from Oslo
Hi everyone,
As some of you may know, Oslo, Norway is the city I call home. Some days ago, as I am confident you know, Oslo became the target of two acts of terrorism carried out by a deranged young ethnic Norwegian more or less my age.
Leaders, Old vs New
by David Kaisar, PhD.
Over at Harvard Business Review, Marshall Goldsmith discusses what he considers the mark of a good leader today, and contrasts it to leaders of the past:
Years ago, when most organizations were based on the hierarchical business model of the Industrial Age, great leaders were those who were unemotional, rational, even mechanistic. Those days are gone. Today’s leader, especially one who is in charge of a dynamic, global organization, finds himself or herself in desperate need of one key trait — self-awareness.
Three Reasons Why Shame is Your Friend
This piece by David Kaisar originally appeared in Lifehack.
OK, this one may be a big surprise for many of you, but here it is, Shame can be your Friend.
Are You On the Receiving End?
One of the biggest issues that shows up in the couples and individuals I work with, particularly in regards to their relationships, is where they are so challenged to comprehend what it means to receive. When you dig down even further with the issue, it becomes clear that a LOT of people don’t know how to fathom the notion of receiving without first having earned it and/or without being sure that the right kind of score-keeping is happening to be sure that the balance sheet of worth is properly maintained.
Broken Bones and the Father Wound
by Rick Belden
Not long ago I wrote, “Bad luck is the language of the unconscious.” In the eight weeks since breaking my right wrist and shoulder in a fall, I’ve had plenty of opportunities to ponder and explore the meaning of those words, and they have led me back, in a most unexpected way, to the connection established with my father during childhood around physical pain, and to the significance of that connection for me as an adult.
Bullying as Childhood Trauma
EDITORS NOTE: Tony Rutt has published an account of his childhood called “Mark” which is centered around the trauma he suffered at the hands of a bully as a child living in the UK. You can read his story here: http://mymarkstory.com/ – Thank you Tony for sharing this story with the ManKind Project!
Local Man Shares Childhood Trauma
interview by Sean Redmond, Hemel FM
The victim cramp of cultural relativists (and how dropping it could save us all)
Editor’s Note: Now that Eivind is a New Warrior … I feel it only right to add some of his more controversial pieces to the ManKind Project Journal, in ‘The Door’ section. ~ Boysen
by Eivind Figenschau Skjellum
I read this short article over at the Good Men Project. Something about some right wing Republican talking about African Americans and who said this in an interview:
New Play “Tickets to Manhood” July 14-30, 2011 NYC
SHOW: Tickets to Manhood by James Scruggs
WHEN: July 14 – July 30
WHERE: Dixon Place, 161 Chrystie Street, NY, NY 10002
HOW MUCH: $15 in advance, $18 at the door.
WHY: a Play about Rites of Passage, Initiation, and Masculinity in the 21st Century.
From the Editor: I will be representing the ManKind Project for a talk-back panel discussion after the July 23 performance of Tickets to Manhood. I saw an early reading of this play and was offered the opportunity – along with a number of other MKP men – to make comments on it … good, bad or ugly. What follows is from my perspective. ~ Boysen Hodgson, MKP Communications Director
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